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AIBU?

To miss that new relationship feeling

7 replies

TraineeBabyCatcher · 31/01/2013 01:28

Been with dp for over 2 years, we have a fab relationship and can't fault it in any way. But I kinda miss that 'everythings new and exciting' feeling that comes with a new relationship. I often daydream about meeting dp all over again.
Am I being daft or is this a normal phase?

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StuntGirl · 31/01/2013 01:36

Honestly? I couldn't wait for that feeling to fade. I felt so overwhelmed with love and joy at first it was actually unbearable sometimes. I couldn't wait for the feeling to 'mature' to something more stable.

I love him with all my heart, I really do. I'm just glad I don't feel like my heart is going to explode anymore.

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LesBOFerables · 31/01/2013 01:45

I don't know- it's like having children really, I think: you enjoy them being newborns, then cheeky toddlers, then growing individuals, then funny and interesting teenagers etc that you love watching tackle the world. You are never done, basically. Or you shouldn't be, if it's right. And, as with kids, you tend to blank out the bad stuff. People forget that their tiny babies made them exhausted, just as they tend to forget the 'will he/won't he call me, does he feel the same way I do, is this row a sign we aren't compatible' stuff that was so stressful. As long as you keep making plans, and still have fun together, you can enjoy all the confidence and comfort that comes with a maturing relationship. You never have to date a twat again!

If you are happy together, all it takes is doing something a bit different and fun once in a while, and you can look after that spark. Have a little adventure together, but appreciate the trust and confidence you've got in each other. That's what the aim of the game is, I reckon.

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StuntGirl · 31/01/2013 01:47

Awh, very wise and lovely post from BOF!

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LesBOFerables · 31/01/2013 01:48

Stuntgirl, I sort of get what you mean Grin. Always 'on' with the intensity, and shattered from staying up all night. I literally didn't sleep for six months. Now I can at least read a book Grin. Keeping that up would have killed me, wonderful though it was. There is still lots of love and excitement, but we don't have to be the romantic equivalent of Keith Richards...

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TraineeBabyCatcher · 31/01/2013 02:10

Yeah good point, I like that I feel secure now and that we are making proper plans for the future, not if we stay together plans. I was just watching something and made me think about it.

I think aswell, because I have literally no sex drive (never have, its not down to dp) that I wish it was like the beginning a bit more because I felt like having sex more then.

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LesBOFerables · 31/01/2013 02:56

Hmm, that's a slightly different issue. Are you missing the version of you that enjoys and wants sex? Or do you worry that he won't stay interested? Or something else?

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YorkshireDeb · 31/01/2013 03:19

I think you can revisit the good bits if the early days. Do you still go out on kid free dates together? It's really lovely to spend quality time as a couple. You may want to try that pretending you don't know each other game (although I never understand how people can do this with a straight face!). If you feel like you wish you wanted more sex, maybe you do want more sex? Put on something nice & charm his socks off! X

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