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AIBU?

To ask son to shower every night?

93 replies

mrsgregorypeck · 27/01/2013 10:11

I ask my son (11) to have a shower every night before a school day. This leads to lots of huffing and puffing and occasional temper tantrums.

To be fair, I remember my brothers at that age were required to have a bath every Sunday and only "a good wash" at the sink in between.

Have our perceptions changed of what constitutes acceptable levels of cleanliness or am I just being unreasonable?

OP posts:

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BoysAreLikeDogs · 27/01/2013 10:16

my chaps shower every night (pre teen and teen); it's evolved from the bathtime routine when they were wee.

No bad thing to be clean, this age is when the whiffyness can start, and we can all remember going to school with a smelly child.

Milliways · 27/01/2013 10:20

At 11 mine started showering every morning - it's what wakes him up! He staggers out of bed at 6.20 - 6.30 and stands in the shower for far too long, but he does it without question and is always ready to leave for the bus at 7.20.

CreamOfTomatoSoup · 27/01/2013 10:21

Unless he plays rugby daily then he doesn't need a shower daily. A 'gentleman's wash' at the sink, cleaning his armpits and bits, should be enough. Do his arms and legs smell?

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 27/01/2013 10:22

YANBU. My 8 yr old DS is getting to the stage where he needs to shower every day. At the moment it is probably 5 days a week he showers. I don't want him to turn into DH who thinks 4 or 5 times a week for an adult male is sufficient!

CreamOfTomatoSoup · 27/01/2013 10:22

i said daily too much!

Startail · 27/01/2013 10:22

Yes if you like paying to heat water.

I don't get this washing when your not dirty habit.

DeafLeopard · 27/01/2013 10:23

I disagree Cream - at that age the hormones are kicking in and they get quite stinky without a daily shower.

Branleuse · 27/01/2013 10:26

not unreasonable if hes stinking.

I make mine bath every other day

redexpat · 27/01/2013 10:28

It depends on your reason, like whether or not he smells, or if he has trouble geting up in the morning.

valiumredhead · 27/01/2013 11:02

I have to ask ds who is the same age to shower every night or he honks of sweaty pre teen He does a lot of sports at school so needs to.

DoItToJulia · 27/01/2013 11:05

My 7 yo showers most days. YANBU.

Toughasoldboots · 27/01/2013 11:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

valiumredhead · 27/01/2013 11:08

At 9/10 ds could get away with every other night, now it is definitely needed every day.

escape · 27/01/2013 11:08

The OP makes a good point though - think it is totally the norm these days for all and sundry to be bathing/showering every day .
BUT, 'back in the day' we never did, and the fact remains, whilst, yes, there was always the few who needed better personal hygiene, the fact remains - most of us were perfectly clean. Teens/Tweens/Kids/Adults are no smellier now that they were then..

dinkystinky · 27/01/2013 11:13

My kids have baths or showers every day - they'd be like that kid from Charlie Brown, all hidden in a miasma of dirt and stink, if they didnt.

tallwivglasses · 27/01/2013 11:41

Enjoy it while it lasts. Soon you won't be able to get him out of the bathroom!

daffodillady · 27/01/2013 11:47

I was always taught that you bath/shower to stay clean not to get clean.

Locketjuice · 27/01/2013 11:50

No that's no unreasonable...it's just hygienic!

mrsgregorypeck · 27/01/2013 11:51

Thanks for all these supportive replies. It's not as if we are expecting him to wash at an outdoor cold tap in the yard; he has a very nice shower-room all to himself. And I look forward to tallwiv's prophecy coming true, as I'm sure it will.

OP posts:

LadyBeagleEyes · 27/01/2013 11:52

Don't worry Op, girls will be on the horizon very soon, and your ds and the bathroom will have a permanent smell of lynx.
DS has been showering everyday since he started High School.

everlong · 27/01/2013 11:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tailtwister · 27/01/2013 11:54

YANBU. I think they really need to wash properly every day at that age and if there isn't time in the morning then it's sensible to do it at night. I couldn't function without washing properly at least once a day (each morning at a minimum) and would do at night too if I had time.

I think it's a good routine to get into.

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BlackholesAndRevelations · 27/01/2013 12:33

Not sure why anyone would think this is U.

SolidSnake · 27/01/2013 12:36

YANBU, personally I feel greasy and yuck if I don't shower every day

CecilyP · 27/01/2013 12:38

Agree with tallwiv and LadyBeagle, so I wouldn't worry about it while he is only 11. Then you will feel glad he has his own shower room as you won't have to make your way through a fug of Lynx in order to get your own shower.

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