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AIBU?

to say its rubbish, that WOHMs dont have so much tidying to do...'leave a tidy house, come home to a tidy house'?

154 replies

KhallDrogo · 25/01/2013 22:19

I've read it on many a thread now....WOHM don't have so much to do, because kids are in childcare setting all day, get picked up, brought home-dinner, bath bed- no mess Confused

I reckon mess-made can be plotted against time, and there is a maximum mess, where no more mess is possible, when everything is out of the cupboards and on the floor already and covered in crumbs and spilt juice. Here the graph plateaus

My kids can reach 'maximum mess' in approximately an hour. Mess saturation point

On the days I work, I definitely have as much/more to do than the days I am at home, and less time to do it in

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Xmasbaby11 · 25/01/2013 22:22

DD makes a mess instantly too! And I prepare all her food for nursery, and she has breakfast and tea at home. Probably less work than if we were at home, though.

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Crikeyblimey · 25/01/2013 22:24

Yep. I work from home some days and can quickly tidy bits and bobs whilst I'm here. When I'm away from home I can't reach anything to put it away, so to speak.

1 hr can certainly equal maximum mess. Plus, I'm home by 5.30, ds goes to bed 8.30 - a LOT of mess can be made by 2 adults and even just 1 child in 3 hours. Plus dust settles even when people are out. Still same amount of cleaning to do, just fewer hours to so it in.

The only time I left a tidy house and came back to one was when I lived alone.

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larks35 · 25/01/2013 22:25

I've never come across any thread that says this, but as a full-time WOHM I totally agree that the mess is just as bad, if not worse than when I'm on hols with them. I need to do a toy cull, did a kind of one after Christmas but DS seems to have emptied all his toy boxes recently and there is useless stuff everywhere!

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AllDirections · 25/01/2013 22:26

YANBU I've often wondered about people saying that. My house is never tidy when I leave for work on a morning, think dishwasher half emptied, discarded clothes that DD3 has taken off or changed her mind about, school stuff lying around that isn't needed that day, letters that haven't been dealt with, breakfast pots all over....

That's what I come home to Sad

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Shakey1500 · 25/01/2013 22:27

I work 37hrs a week, finishing at 1pm on a Friday. This gives me 2 precious hours to clean until leaving at 3pm for school pick up. Today I did 2 loads of washing, dusted everywhere, swept and mopped the floors (including the minging bit under the dining table Blush as well as picking up a hundred things that belonged in other rooms.

After about ooooooh 3 hours, it looked like a bomb site. Dinner crumbs on the floor, more washing in the machine, about a hundred toy cars littered around the place and a spilt drink Hmm

YANBU

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knackeredmother · 25/01/2013 22:29

I never quite get this either, when people say work is the easy option, particularly when said by SAHM whose dc are at school.. When I'm at work I still have all the jobs to do like shopping, cooking, cleaning as when I'm not at work. I just have to do them AFTER work instead of having all day to do them.
I realised I will get flamed for this but I genuinely don't get it.

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missmapp · 25/01/2013 22:30

I'm not sure, I work fulltime and the house work is easier to keep on top of than in the holidays when the boys are home all day.having said that, they can make a Lego chaos mountain within minutes of us getting home!

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KhallDrogo · 25/01/2013 22:31

Haha...yes the mess created in the morning is unbelievable! Grin

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bigbuttons · 25/01/2013 22:35

i have just gone back to work. Have 6 dc's and am a single mum( recently) and I am too knackered to keep on top of it all. I've a feeling it'll be weekend tidying in the BB household.
It was much easier when I was a sahm, not just time- wise either,energy-wise too.

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Patchouli · 25/01/2013 22:35

Oh no. Really?
I'm going back to work soon - was looking forward to a tidy house.

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Morloth · 25/01/2013 22:37

My house is messier on my work days, because I don't do any housework then and I also do whatever is easiest to get everybody, fed/happy etc. Easy usually equals messy.

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Nospringflower · 25/01/2013 22:39

I do agree with this a bit. I work 30 hours so am out all day and I do think it's much tidier/cleaner on days we're all out than during the holidays when we're home. You can't make a mess when you're not there Grin

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Meglet · 25/01/2013 22:39

YANBU.

My DC's can destroy the house in the house between getting up and leaving the house. Breakfast is thrown, but I rarely have time to pick it up properly. Hanger and pj's are flung in the living room. Toys are got out while I get ready, cbeebies alone doesn't contain them.

When we get in they play and make more mess. We still need to eat and wear clean clothes and that is crammed into the time after work.

My house is a mess these days, I've sort of given up (it's not SS levels or anything though!).

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KhallDrogo · 25/01/2013 22:40

Sorry patchouli! Best you find out like this Grin

Gawd Yy to lack of energy

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mercibucket · 25/01/2013 22:46

nah, yabu, it is way tidier when we're all out

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EndoplasmicReticulum · 25/01/2013 22:48

Ha ha ha ha.

Would work if they left the house and got back at the same time as me, perhaps. However they have an hour in the morning and a couple after school with their father adding to the mess.

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gaelicsheep · 25/01/2013 22:49

Sorry can I please qualify this thread? I believe it might be said that families where BOTH parents work don't have as much tidying to do - I might have said it myself even, although I accept it might not be true. Being a WOHM does not mean your kids are in childcare any more than someone being a WOHD means that. Just saying. As you were.

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changeforthebetter · 25/01/2013 22:50

Bollocks to that! The DDs can create havoc play creatively for 20 mins while I dry my hair and apply war paint. Tis creative pretendy stuff and they are dressed and breakfasted. And Oh my days - the detritus after the school/work departure... Gloves, socks, scarves, water bottles, Barbie-shit..... I was an SAHM many moons ago. I think WOHM is a bit easier in that you are not surrounded by chaos all dayGrin

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KhallDrogo · 25/01/2013 22:56

Yy change tis true, you don't have to look at it all day Grin

And Yy sheep quite right to pull me up on covert sexism (i sometimes forget about dads, because my x is so useless, I forget they can have input/a role.....shhh)

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Summerblaze · 25/01/2013 22:57

I think it depends on a lot of factors such as how long are you out of the house, your children's temperament, time before you go out.

I am a SAHM now but worked 2 days a week a few years ago. On them days I got up mega early and made sure that the house was tidy before I went out so obviously that is what we came home to. I worked a long day so by the time I got home my dc's had been given their tea by my parents, DS was straight to bed and DD isn't the dumping her toys all over type so just sits and draws etc. On these days my house was tidy, much tidier than when I was at home all day with DS.

Now I don't work at all and DD and DS1 are at school, my house is tidy all day as DS2 is only a baby and doesn't make much mess......yet. However, at 3.45 pm, my DS1 can trash the place in an hour.

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catgirl1976 · 25/01/2013 22:58

YANBU

I leave DH in the house all day so I leave a tidy house, come home to a shit tip, which DS then adds too.

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TreadOnTheCracks · 25/01/2013 23:04

My dc are 5 and 7, I have been back at work (21 hrs a week) a year: since the youngest started school.

I have to say I do find there is less hoovering to do now we are all out of the house all day.

I make the dc have a quick tidy up of what they have been playing with before we leave in the mornings (otherwise they have to do it during their screen time later).

I also have an hour in the afternoon where I can tidy up a bit.

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Startail · 25/01/2013 23:05

Small DCs make instant mess, older DCs are definitely worse in school holidays.

Mine were home due to snow and they baked and got their own lunch and have definitely made more mess than playing SIMs and doing HW in an evening.

Oh and they've covered the kitchen in wellies, dripping coats, gloves and waterproof trousers too!

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Bumblequeen · 25/01/2013 23:20

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at poster's request.

nailak · 25/01/2013 23:27

maximum mess can be created in an hour, and it is a mess before leaving in the morning, but you only have to deal with it once not multiple times.

for example i would get my oldest ready and in morning she would chuck clothes off, have breakfast things etc, so then i have to tidy that up

then younger two would have breakfast and get changed creating another maximum mess so i have to clear that up, then they will play, again mess to tidy up, lunch to cook, lunch to tidy up, hoover to be done, get ready to go to nursery which would be same sort of mess as in morning, then come back tidy up, then after two hours start school run at 3, be back by 4 from 2 mile walk with crying hungry cold 3 under fives, who come home take off all their stuff which makes a mess demand food so again cook, clean, washing up, hoover, etc, and then we have dinner, and again washing, cooking, hoover etc.

so compared to if i got them ready dropped them at childminders then came home and had to cook once and tidy up only breakfast things and morning mess is definitely less housework!

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