Aibu to think Dh spoilt the cake?

[ChandlerBingsNubbin]

Spend ages doing a giraffe cake for ds' 5th Bday. Get it all finished and iced, and dh, who for some reason thinks he is Jamie fucking Oliver, comes along and goes to dust some coco powder on it, why I don't know, but he just chucks half the box over the middle of the cake. It looks crap, he is now in a bad mood, since I asked why he could not just leave it alone, he always has to bloody well fiddle with stuff when I'm cooking or doing something. It is very annoying. I spend all day on the cake for him to come along and chuck a load of bloody coco powder over it. It now looks like it has some sort of skin condition since he has sort of mixed it in with the icing!

[LadyMaryQuiteContrary]

Can you go over it with food colouring?

[PureQuintessence]

Leave the bastard.

Something is seriously wrong in your relationship if you think he is deliberately ruining the food you make.

[LittleBoSqueak]

Use a hairdryer on a cool setting to blow it off or a clean paint brush etc?

I would be annoyed too! Did he ask you if he could do this?

[ChandlerBingsNubbin]

Oh, I don't think he did it on purpose, but he worked as a "chef" ie he worked in a kitchen for all of 2 months when a student so he has, you know culinary experience! I spent ages getting the colour for the icing right so it was a sort of orangey giraffe like colour, then put a load of spots on with chocolate butter cream...but he always thinks whatever I do needs a little bit more!

If he thinks that when he is cooking fine, but I get fed up of cooking to find him just adding something or other to it as he thinks it will be nice. It was nice before!

[MmmnoodlesoupIsDueXmasEve]

Ooh he's a spoonyfucker. LTB.

[ChandlerBingsNubbin]

Although tbf, I messed the eye up, made it too small, and too far forward, then to make it look more like an eye tried to add eyelashes. Looks more like a spider crawled on there and died tbh!


Poor ds. He should have stuck with the Goldfish cake he originally wanted!

[AreYouADurtBirdOrALadyBird]

Have you got an unused blusher brush? That would be soft enough to brush off the cocoa.

[HumphreyCobbler]

This would make me rage, however much he didn't mean it.

[AnneTwacky]

Your DS will still love it. He won't notice the eye or the cocoa powder.

[Sparkletastic]

Absolutely agree with the spoonyfucker diagnosis. Pop his knackers in your food processor.

[StuntGirl]

Agree with humphrey, and the spoonyfucker diagnoses. You have to kill him, it's your only option.

[NoelHeadbands]

Yy spoonyfucker and cheffytosser

[ChandlerBingsNubbin]

Yes ds is still very happy with his cake, he wants to eat the head!

Dh has not been drinking, he rarely drinks tbh.

He just had this idea in his head that he would make it look "better" and instead messed it up.

But the cooking thing, I actually stopped doing any cooking for about 6 months a few years back, as I got fed up oh him adding a dash of this or that to make it better! So I get irrationally annoyed now when he messes with my cooking!

it is an unwritten rule, baking, Yorkshire puddings, gravy and roasties are MINE TO DO and he does not get involved unless expressly invited. Usually I get him to measure everything out as he has a freaky eye and 9/10 gets it spot on without trying. He has now broken this rule so I shall have to wait till he is asleep and put toothpaste on his eyebrows or something.

I am now refusing to cook tonight at all, and demanding take out.

[pregnantpause]

aaarrgghh ! This kitchen shit infuriates me! my dh has but one flaw, and it is following me into the kitchen, two steps behind, stirring this, adding a dash of that leave it a bloody lone you interfering old sod!
One memorable occasion was when I thought there was.something wrong with slowcooker as everything tasted odd, on speaking to dh he advised its probably because I had not been putting enough sugar in things, and as I'm sooo funny about him adding things he was only putting a pinch in himself. Dick

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Yes he did - ban him from meddling with your efforts.

However, couldh't you just switch a fan onto full power to blow the cocoa powder off?

[MyThumbsHaveGoneWeird]

I bet he adds salt to your cooking when you are out of the room too doesn't he? But adjusting a decorated cake is really crossing a line. You need some rules and you need to make them absolutely clear. He does NOT get to be the wronged party in this one.

[MyThumbsHaveGoneWeird]

Ah x post! You're there already :)

[Wheresmycaffeinedrip]

Send him to spoons fuckers anonymous!!! I bloody hate it when the men interfere!!!!

[ChandlerBingsNubbin]

He sort of stirred the cocoa powder into the icing after I had erm... calmly asked what one earth he thought he was doing, so it will have to stay like that now!

It is like for DS's 1st birthday, I did a rubber duck cake, a standing up one, took me 12 hours that fecker did. Got it all iced, looking brilliant, made a little pond, Dh iced the pond for me, as I was still working on the cake and then it was all "look at the cake we made" from him. WE!!? hmph


Mind you, he does do me heart shaped eggs to go in my bacon and egg sarnies he makes me on my birthday or valentines day.

[PessaryPam]

I am married to an opinionated spoonyfucker and yesterday we had friends round and we did a pot of food each. I contributed 0 helpful comments to his effort. He contributed circa 10 unhelpful comments to mine. I have more or less given up cooking now, the kids think I am a slut but I can't take the continual input. If he knows better he can fucking well do it! Arrrrgggghhhh!

PS the guest ate both his and mine and liked it.

[MyThumbsHaveGoneWeird]

Do as I do. Embrace the fact that he likes cooking and let him get on with it while you get on with mumsnetting important things.

[fishandlilacs]

Please explain the term spoonyfucker?

[ripsishere]

My DH has the potential to be a spoonyfucker (I think). He seldom cooks, generally his signature dish - roast chicken is done on Sundays while I take the girl to the cinema.
Today he didn't fancy cooking . As a rule, he stays out of it, sometimes though and with increasing frequency he sidles up to me as I dish it up. He is groaning more and more like his weaslyingratiating father.

[ripsishere]

growing.