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please share your tragic stories with me to help me. Or do me an Ocado.

(60 Posts)
InNeatCognac Sun 20-Jan-13 14:58:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Salmotrutta Sun 20-Jan-13 15:43:19

I don't know why I said manure ...

It seemed appropriate, somehow confused

InNeatCognac Sun 20-Jan-13 15:43:57

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RowanMumsnet (MNHQ) Sun 20-Jan-13 15:46:33

MrsLouisTheroux OP wanting to "wank himself purple" isn't worthy of a MN delete then?

Sorry MrsLF - we don't delete for bad language, if that's what you mean? (Apols if I'm missing the point)

AlistairSim Sun 20-Jan-13 15:46:52

Are you the poo-troll, Salmo??

BupcakesAndCunting Sun 20-Jan-13 15:47:13

I am married to Peter Andre.

InNeatCognac Sun 20-Jan-13 15:49:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ripsishere Sun 20-Jan-13 15:51:08

Do you know, I keep getting drawn back to this thread even though I should be in bed.
I had a dream about me and Pete. We lived on the Isle of Sheppy.

MrsLouisTheroux Sun 20-Jan-13 15:51:30

RowanMUMSNET Your rules.

suburbophobe Sun 20-Jan-13 15:52:39


Salmotrutta Sun 20-Jan-13 15:53:32

No I am not the poo troll Alistair!!

How very dare you ...

Salmotrutta Sun 20-Jan-13 15:53:51


Salmotrutta Sun 20-Jan-13 15:55:22

I'm supposed to be doing school prep and marking.


BupcakesAndCunting Sun 20-Jan-13 15:56:20

If you multiplied my love by infinity, by thrice the circumference of the earth, by the distance in miles to the farthest planet in our solar system then again by number of grains of sand on earth, my love would still only equate to one hundreth of PALFHK.

AlistairSim Sun 20-Jan-13 15:59:13

I think you protest too much, Salmo.

I bet you're sniffing out skidmarks right now.

Filthy beast.

LesBOFerables Sun 20-Jan-13 15:59:52

My aunt and uncle live by the ocean. They share a boxroom and talk about bedroomy things.

Salmotrutta Sun 20-Jan-13 16:00:15


TheCunnyFuntIsAGrittersWife Sun 20-Jan-13 16:01:01

My BIL is from the Isle of Sheppey!!

This is a Wacker plate.

MrsGeologist Sun 20-Jan-13 16:04:30

If only we could harness the power of PALFHK, then there would be free power for everyone.

DameFanny Sun 20-Jan-13 16:07:02

I have 3 husbands that I'm sharing with 8 other wives. Send donations to ohgoonthen@paypal and I'll put pictures on my profile.

Oh, AIBU to think that straw makes the perfect hair accessory?

Salmotrutta Sun 20-Jan-13 16:18:46

I'm down to my last polo pony.

CryptoFascist Sun 20-Jan-13 16:21:07

The squashed mum troll! My favourite! (I am a namechanger but not a poo/penis/compactor troll I swear dib dib dib).

Although I found where ol' Squashy hangs out, it's a yahoo group called Flatopia (was easy to find by googling his key phrases). Check that out if you want a serious wtf moment.

ripsishere Sun 20-Jan-13 16:22:33

I see, you live and learn. I thought they were called road thumpers.
Peter Andre and me lived in a flat above a 7-11. We had to split up when he wouldn't let my DD bring her friends home.
I think the reason for the dream was DD learning mysterious girl in choir and singing it. And singing it. And singing it. And singing it, and you tubing it......

Portofino Sun 20-Jan-13 16:33:38

I was orphaned young and then adopted by my Aunt and Uncle, who stole my inheritance and spent it on building a donkey sanctuary on my parent's farm.

ripsishere Sun 20-Jan-13 16:44:14

sad poor Porto. Aren't you in CH where donkeys (amongst many other animals) have to be kept in pairs?

Portofino Sun 20-Jan-13 16:55:57

I have not seen my twin sister since 1987 when she went on a day trip to Belgium.

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