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To HATE my husband's thick orange beard???

(133 Posts)
SplitHeadGirl Sat 19-Jan-13 19:44:25

My husband has grown a really thick beard that covers half his face and completely covers his mouth. He has gone from being gorgeous (like a young Richard Armitage) to looking like a scruffy, unkempt pensioner who has had a really hard life!

I told him weeks ago (stubble stage) that as it was his face, he could of course grow a beard, whatever he wanted and I would support him. BUT....I hadn't counted on how it has affected my physical feelings about him. I find him unattractive and strange to look at, like I don't know him. sad I miss the face I fell in love with.

He is a lot grumpier now too and as he now looks older he has started to ACT older and I wonder if losing his young looks (he could easily get them back if he shaved that damn thing off his face) has made him lose his young personality.

I am cross with myself as I KNOW it is just facial hair and I would hate it if he didn't find me attractive anymore for some stupid physical reason. He has even joined a beard forum (a beard board) where he and a bunch of other guys post pics of themselves and support and encourage each other's beard growth!!!!

Shouldn't I just get over it??? I feel like I am being unreasonable...but I hate that I can't see his beautiful face anymore and that he has changed so much and I hate that I don't find him attractive like this.sad

mrsjay Sat 19-Jan-13 21:18:52

my dh did the same before christmas not ginger but he looked like a hobo grin and I told him so after weeks of hinting and being subtle about it . he went and got it trimmed and shaped when he got a haircut I have let him keep it for now

quoteunquote Sat 19-Jan-13 21:38:28

When I was a small child I was terrified of men without beards, as my dad has always had a beard, and all of his friends have beards (scientists)

one of them had a red beard that he wore in two plaits they reached below the waist, he also had very long red hair which he wore in a big plait, he also always wore red dungarees and red kickers,

but he didn't have the most impressive beard out of the group, it seemed very competitive.

Dad still has a massive beard which is now brilliant white, no matter where in the world he is every child that spots him thinks he is father christmas/santa much to their parents embarrassment, he does tend to walk round in a kilt and Norwegian jumper, but even in Hawaii on the beach children run up screaming santa, he secretly loves it,

OP, make sure your husband registers with an extra agency, he will get work, TV and film companies are always looking for interesting men.

Porkster Sat 19-Jan-13 21:42:50

Yuck, yuck, yuck.

My dh grew a beard, in competition with a friend.

Within 2 weeks, he resembled Desperate Dan with a hideous, black beard.

I refused to kiss him, so it didn't last long.

kalidanger Sat 19-Jan-13 21:49:25

I was very disturbed how much less attractive I found my ex without a bit of stubble/short beard* shock He just didn't look as hot, even though he was, of course, just as hot hmm Just didn't make me think phwoar and the strength of that was very weird and I felt bad and I kept it to myself until now but I know how you feel, OP. I was older than him too and perhaps him looking older made me feel less odd about that too. What a mess no wonder we broke up.

* this is obvs the sand the other way around

earlyriser Sat 19-Jan-13 21:50:05

My DH grew a beard, which i didn't mind after the stubble phase was over, but when he shaved it off, it instantly made him look 10 years younger. I think he was quite chuffed at that. (ponders if growing my own beard then getting it waxed off would make me look 10 years younger) grin

PomBearWithAnOFRS Sat 19-Jan-13 22:45:09

Useless fact for the day - Pogonophobia is the fear of beards grin

EuroShagmore Sat 19-Jan-13 22:48:02

Face pubes. Yeuch.

In fact, referring to the beard constantly as "face pubes" might help your case.

VisualiseAHorse Sat 19-Jan-13 22:51:31

I like my OH's beard. He looks very strange without it.

Narked Sat 19-Jan-13 22:52:37

YAB really U. It's his face.

overmydeadbody Sat 19-Jan-13 23:04:16


I prefer my DP with his beard, he looks different if he ever shaves it off, and he knows I prefer it so doesn't ever shave it off any more. It is short, he clippers it regularly, but not shaped at all, just natural hair growth. It is very sexy I tihnk, and lovely to rub against.

SupermassiveLBD Sat 19-Jan-13 23:04:38


DonderandBlitzen Sat 19-Jan-13 23:04:53

Could you let all your hair grow everywhere? Under your arms, down below etc and say that you will keep it for as long as he keeps his beard

DumSpiroSpero Sat 19-Jan-13 23:07:33

Awww Massive - you beat me to it! grin

Alconleigh Sat 19-Jan-13 23:07:57

My ex had his beard shaved off at the barber's, on a whim. When he got home, I actually cried blush He did point out that this was a bit much. He did look like a fat lesbian without it though. I am going to get flamed for that,aren't I?

DumSpiroSpero Sat 19-Jan-13 23:08:53

OP, perhaps he just needs some styling tips!

SupermassiveLBD Sat 19-Jan-13 23:13:23

grin Spiro.

Theshriekingharpy Sat 19-Jan-13 23:14:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MumofWombat Sat 19-Jan-13 23:14:18

My DH grew his beard just before I met him, and I totally fancy him with it! His friends and family want him to shave it off - and they really stepped it up before our wedding. I told him that if I walked down the aisle towards a clean shaven person I didn't recognise I'd be walking back up it pretty darn quickly!
I've seen photos, he's much hotter with the beard. But he does groom it, gets regular trims etc.
We are considering doing a beard shave for the charity that supports our DS with his heart condition. Reckon it might be a bit more interesting as I've never known him beardless!

soaccidentprone Sat 19-Jan-13 23:26:30

maybe these have inspired him?

sorry blush

NotGeoffVader Sat 19-Jan-13 23:38:06

Another beard-lover here. Not those great big bushy ones that you can hide a badger in though - just a 'face-hugging slightly longer than stubble one'.

And on DH, not on me. grin

Lindsay321 Sat 19-Jan-13 23:46:18

Dp sometimes has a beard, I think he thinks he looks "Jedi" with it.

It's totally fine by me. It's his face. I just hate it when he's out in the cold and it get's all condensation-y then he kisses me. Yuck! All wet and cold!

MusicalEndorphins Sat 19-Jan-13 23:46:25

I wouldn't hint I didn't like it, I'd say I hated it. (I do hate facial hair). Can he go all those weeks without sex?
My oldest son grows a beard a few times a year, he says some women like scruffy men.
I don't mind neatly trimmed and groomed facial hair, but not the caveman look.

quoteunquote Sat 19-Jan-13 23:49:25

get him to do this

join this
or these

If you go to a weekend you end up very very drunk on homemade mead and beer.

LadyBeagleEyes Sat 19-Jan-13 23:51:03

You either like a beard or you don't, personally I loathe them.
If he was always beardy, fair enough, but to suddenly produce one mid marriage/relationship is not on.

foreverondiet Sat 19-Jan-13 23:51:13

I hate beards.

But say someone's DH said they didn't like their wife's hair or excess weight?

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