This is eating me up. I don't know if it's my biological clock or what.
I spilt with DS's dad when he was 18 months. I always wanted two or three children and to get married. I preferably wanted my husband to be my DC's father. I don't feel that was an unreasonable expectation by any means.
After we split, I never met a man who wanted children with me or who wanted to marry me, so I'm still not married. DS is now 14 and is an only child. I honestly feel like it's a personal failing on my part.
I now have a DP, but he doesn't want children. He mentioned marriage a few times, but it's expensive, and he hasn't made much effort to sort it out anyway. No ring or actual proper proposal, so he can't be serious. So, last time he said something, I got really narked told him to save the money and that I'm not bothered about getting married now anyway. I feel rather crushed by him bringing it up whilst drunk when he obviously didn't mean it.
I love DS to bits and I know I am lucky to have him, but I still feel so upset that I'm 35 and my time is running out. It's unlikely that I'll have any more children. I feel so sad when I see friends and family that are married, or have more than one DC. I just feel like I'm not good enough for someone to marry, nobody wants to have children with me either. Am I really that bad?
I'm glad other people have good relationships and have beautiful children, but I wonder why they can have these things and I can't? What is so wrong with me that I'm 35, nobody has ever wanted to marry me and I have never found anyone to have another DC with?
Sorry for pity party, but AIBU to be really upset about this?
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AIBU?
To feel really upset about the fact that I've never been married at 35 and I want more children?
45 replies
BunFagFreddie · 19/01/2013 09:32
OP posts:
Adversecamber ·
19/01/2013 09:48
This reply has been deleted
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Adversecamber ·
19/01/2013 09:50
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