Have spent most of today in tears and am disgusted with myself.
Have DD 3.5 and DS 16months. Just cannot seem to cope and don't know how others do.
DS requires my atention full time. He is very high maintenance. He is into everything and you cannot turn your back on him for a second. He is quite a clingy and tearful baby and I just feel I cannot look after him and DD and DD suffers. All she ever hears from me is Later, Not just now, Sorry I have to look after DS.
She got lots of lovely toys for Xmas, jigsaws, games, etc and all she wants to do is play with me but it's literally impossible, DS comes and trashes whatever she is playing with or I need to stop playing with her after a few minutes to take his fingers out the socket/stop him pulling furniture on top of himself. I love him so much it hurts but I do not know how to manage them both. She still has a nap so the only time we get together is a brief half an hour before her bedtime, which is often interrupted by DS waking. DH works long hours and is rarely home before 9 - no option for this to change.
Today he wouldn't stay in his high chair at dinner and screamed his head off to get out, when I let him out he just kept climbing up on the dinner table, so I put him in his play pen thing and he just screamed. Eventually poor DD was left to eat dinner herself while I managed him. Earlier today it genuinely broke my heart, after trying and failing to do her jigsaw with her a few times and DS breaking it she packed it in his box and went up to her room and did it by herself. I sat and cried.
My house is a filthy mess, I am exhausted and overweight, I don't have the time or energy to make healthy meals so just stuff crap in my mouth all day. I haven't washed my hair for days and I have BO. When they go to bed I spend 2 hours cleaning then go to bed myself. We couldn't afford a cleaner. I have no time to read or watch TV or do anything. I always have the intention of taking them to playgroup but by 9am I'm so exhausted I can't face it, I told you, I'm useless. More often than not I stick the TV on in desperation for DD as any attempt at play is just thwarted. I found myself screaming at DS today WILL YOU JUST LET HER PLAY!!! Then burst into tears as I was so disgusted with myself at shouting at my baby.
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AIBU?
to think I am a USELESS mum - don't know how others do it.
76 replies
abouttohaveameltdown · 13/01/2013 20:21
OP posts:
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