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To have 'The Rage' and hate myself for it.

(35 Posts)
GrrrrArrgh Sat 29-Dec-12 01:12:33

DH and I have been trying for another DC for the best part of a year. No joy.

A lovely friend of mine has been trying for a similar amount of time. She messaged me today to tell me she is pregnant.

God love her she told me first. Of course I went straight back to her to tell her I am thrilled for her. I AM thrilled for her.

Then I cried and cried in a bitter jealous rage. Then DH told me I am insane and a horrid person because I should be happy for her.

I am happy for her, but I am sad and utterly jealous and bitter for me.

Now I feel like a complete cunt. And I may have to cry a bit more, and seethe a bit, and possibly throw myself to the floor and stamp my feet.

I don't know what is wrong with me tbh, I know IABU.

MrsKeithRichards Sat 29-Dec-12 09:09:36

Been there, totally normal. Have you seen your go yet? I went after a year I'd trying, I was 27 with one dc already and he was quite surprised I hadn't came in sooner really. He done that 21 day test which was fine, said to get eh to hand in a sample and mentioned he'd see me in a year with a baby. he was right, he done my son's 6 week check almost exactly a year later.

PessaryPam Sat 29-Dec-12 09:39:50

Are you sure you should have a child with your 'D'H? He sounds like he will not be supportive if he can't support you now and understand your sadness and frustration.

shlomojo Sat 29-Dec-12 10:00:12

YANBU imo totally normal reaction, and the only person who saw it was your DP. It's not like you cried and screamed to your preggo friend ffs! He should have been more understanding that you do have emotions as well.

It's NOT normal to be calm and placid all the time!

Perfectly normal, your dh is a twat.

Who wants to be with someone who expects you to swallow your own normal feelings at home?

Maybe he was frightened by the strength of your reaction? But to try to take it away from you is unacceptable.

TheShriekingHarpy Sat 29-Dec-12 10:17:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

peaceandlovebunny Sat 29-Dec-12 10:30:35

normal. 100% normal.

MummytoMog Sat 29-Dec-12 10:33:12

Very normal - I'm not even trying for DC3 yet and I had to sneak off to the loos to cry when my colleague announced she was pregnant with twins (PMS strikes again).

I had a tough time getting my first, second was quicker DH has had snip and I STILL get emotional when anyone tells me they are PG, even though I am too old for babies. Colleague had 6 years of IVF then baby was stillborn, had a natural PG soon after and was not trying again, 5 years later she tells me in secret she is PG again, I cried in genuine delight this time.

TerraNotSoFirma Sat 29-Dec-12 13:49:11

Completely normal reaction.
We'd been trying for 9 months after our first pregnancy ended in an ectopic and loss of a tube.
My good friend, hadn't even been trying but was late, As I had hundreds many pregnancy tests, I offered her one, she POAS, positive result right in front of my eyes.

I held it together while she was with me, but when she left I was inconsolable, bitter and jealous.
I got over it and I'm sure it will pass for you too. It's a totally normal response.

GrrrrArrgh Sat 29-Dec-12 14:23:30

Well I am feeling a bit better this morning.

I suspect DH felt a bit guilty since he brought DD down this morning, breakfasted her and took down the Xmas tree, tidied all the stuff away and cleaned the sitting room.

He let me sleep til noon blush

Now just waiting for AF to start the bitch and I can start the New Year with a positive attitude... maybe

thanks to all.

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