PIL dog - advice please(267 Posts)
We're currently visiting the in laws for Xmas an their dog has just gone for me, u bent downto give him a sausage and he went for my face - punctured my eyelid and caused a blood blister and a lot of bruising - I'll be getting one of them to take me to the doctor tomorrow morning, they're very rural, and everyone has had a bit too much to drink, so cannot drive.
This in itself is bad enough, but the dog shortly after snapped at dd and hurt her hand - he did not draw blood, but obviously scared her.
My question is how do I handle this - in laws are brushing it under the carpet - I've not been able to speak to DP alone since it happened. But I just want to leave, I am worried about going to the doctor, will I have to report the dog? It's not the first time he's had a go at me, but it is the first time he's made contact.
I'm kind of scared of the dog an can't stand being around it or even have DD in the same room - and I'm normally a massive dog person.
Aside from a banging headache I'm ok, I've cleaned it up and taken some ibuprofen, it's a bit swollen and bruised but I think it'll be ok.
Any ideas on how to handle this?
Why not offer to take the dog for a little walk....somewhere near a canal? You could always say it ran away.*
*I am not being wholly serious.
Oh please! Not every dog sees cats like that, many dogs have had the hunter bred well and truly out. You are making excuses. There are more than 2 reasons for a dogs agressive behaviour, and training and upbringing is one of them. The dog was reacting agressively to the cat, it behaved agressively to the OP and her DD. Its an agressive dog.
I am a dog owner and would have done the same in the OPs position. No one is going to stand by and watch a dog rip a cat to shreds! And a dog who is in the process of attempting to rip a cat to shreds is highly unlikely to notice being kicked and file the perpetrators details away for the future!
I do agree though, the dog isnt entirely to blame. Its owners bear the responsibility and blame for its behaviour. It should be adequately restrained when in the presence of other people and animals!
MTB. Please update when able. A bit worried about your eye.
And let us know whether ht that wretched dog has been. Dealt with.
Hope all is ok for you.
CoolaYuleA - the kick was done to stop dog attacking/mauling the cat. It's OK to use force to protect another animal. It's not like the OP was just randomly kicking the dog!
The dog is obviously very aggressive and dangerous.
Leave ASAP. Go to the GP and get the wound looked at/reported. Has the dog hurt anyone else? I strongly suspect this dog could easily kill a child.
Explain that you/kids are never going to be in the same room/house as dog. There is no discussion to be had. That is what is happening.
Report the dog. Imagine how you will feel if the dog actually does seriously injure a neighbor/child and you have done nothing.
Morning all, the fall out has started, in that I've refused to let DD into PiL's room where te dogs sleep this morning, something I'm normally happy with. So have had to do a lot of explaining to DD as to why, and because I said so sadly doesn't work in this case. DD will not be out of my sight today. DP thinks I'm over reacting.
We'll be heading out this morning to the nearest town so I'll make sure I go to the walkin clinic there. My eye is less swollen but vision is quite blurry in that eye, and I'd be lying if I sai I wasn't concerned about it.
Just to clarify a point, the dog I kicked was PiL's other dog, and since that incident has not gone for my cats again. I'd also like to stress that kicking it was a last resort, I'd tried pulling it off the cat, but it was not responding. I grew up with dogs and have always loved them, an would never hurt a dog unless it was an absolute last resort. Just to add one more point, they did not have this dog that bit me when the cat incident occurred so did not see me hurting it's friend.
It did come to light last night that the dog has bitten FiL in the past, again unprovoked and put a couple of holes in FiLs cheek.
Why they didn't tell me this before hand I dot know, I would never have even let DD anywhere near the dog
Sorry to drip feed just reading last nights and this mornings posts...
I would feel awful if the dog hurt a child and I could have stopped it by reporting the dog.
After a lot of thinking dogs will not be welcome in our house ever again. It makes me so sad as I'd finally got DP roun to the idea of having a dog, but now I just wouldn't risk it.
MIL has just been through to try and convince me I don't need to get it checked out. I just don't understand why she's being like this - thing aren't great between us but why risk her DGD?
If your tetanus is not up to date you'll need a vaccination, so go to the doctor asap a there is a time limit after the bite for this. The doctor will ask if it was your dog or someone else's, so you can report this if you want to without telling either your PIL or your DH. (I was bitten when separating a dog fight recently so am fairly up to date on this)
You need to get to the A&E asap you could have damage to your eye that is not apparent yet. Please.
Oh dear, you poor thing. Glad you are getting your eye looked at this morning' you do definitely need to. Personally there is no way I would be staying in the house With DD any longer. Your PIL are clearly not taking this seriously and I wouldn't trust them to make sure the dog stays separated during your visit.
Given that the dog has already caused a facial injury I find it amazing they let it near your DD in the first place. It's now caused two facial injuries and bitten your DD. that would be the end for me, there is no way I would be visiting them again or having the dog in my house, I wouldn't accept any contact between the dog and DD again. Your DH and PIL aren't taking this seriously so that only leaves you to. I say that as owner of large brown mutt currently snoring on my bedroom floor.
Everyone who should be supporting you isn't and is undermining your correct thoughts, feelings and instincts. The PIL and your DH are trying to minimise the incident, it is just a small bit to your eye, it hardly scratched your DD, it doesn't need checking out, we don't need to do anything about the dog, your DH doesn't have to deal with the fall out from his parents over a bloody dog.
What about you, your eye and your DD. I cannot believe how blind these people are to the danger to your DD, your DH is seriously out of order and should be taking you to a clinic and going home. Good luck with this, trust your instincts and don't let them make it out to be your fault, it is theirs for not training and controlling their dogs.
Agree with WynkenBlynkenandNob completely. They should be making sure that their DGD is safe not the bloody dog.
My advice :
Get your injury checked out urgently. Take DD along to double check that there is no unseen injury to her hand.
Tell DH that you and DD are leaving as you will not be spending any more time in a house with dangerous dogs.
Look into reporting the dog - perhaps the hospital staff will know how this is done or can do it as part of their recording process ?
Get your eye checked out and go home with DD. Leave the PIL with their dogs, don't worry about the fallout, that's for your DP to handle however he can.
many dog owners are irrational about their animals, so an extended discussion to explain how and why and what and who is pointless.
Stay calm, state your reasons for leaving and never coming back and stick to them.
Despite any frothing, justifications or insistence that you are being over-protective and worrying about nothing. You aren't. You are being sensible.
'Dog bite don't tend to lead to infections so I am sure you will be ok, just do what you feel is right in your heart.'
eltsih, are you for real? Dog bites usually lead to infections, including deadly ones like blood poisoning. Where did you obtain this misconception from?
Please report the dog. It has bitten three times. Imagine it was a child.
There was a link the other day on mn about a family dog who bit their child, it caught an artery in the child's neck. The little boy died.
The dog had never bitten before, your pils has. It really needs to be PTS.
Ill see if I can find the link.
I think the reason your mil doesn't want you to go to a and e is she knows there will be awkward questions asked
Please go to a&e, insist on it now. This is serious, why is pils feelings more important to your dh than your sight?!?!?
Not to worry you OP, but if a dog bite breaks the skin it needs to be seen by a doctor as soon as possible. The risk of infection is huge and your eye isn't really an area you want to mess with. Check out the NHS choices website for confirmation if your IL's are trying to fob you off.
Do please go and get checked if your vision is blurred but don't get hung up on the issue of reporting it. The law on dangerous dogs only applies in public places so there is nothing anyone can do about a bite on private property. There have been campaigns about this but that's how it stands so they have not committed any offence and the dog can't be seized.
You really really need medical attention for yourself, to keep your DD away from this dangerous dog and to report the dog as it is a danger to other people too. Your PILs are clearly very irresponsible people so you have to be the responsible one.
Huge dog lover here, I am shocked how your Pil are treating this. Surely their DGD comes first?? Your MIL seems to be trying to brush the issue away...but I have a feeling they know more and are desperately trying to protect their dogs. Anyone with common sense would suggest a Dr visit asap...she obviously thinks her dog is in danger. I would go to drs, get checked out, feign/exaggerate illness (to allow DH a get-out clause) and get home. And don't visit again for a very very long time. Keep us posted OP and good luck.
Blurry vision in the injured eye sounds very worrying. You definitely need to get that checked out ASAP - no matter what MIL says!
Also a huge dog lover here.
You must get the wound seen ASAP (also a HCP)
Dog bites carry huge risk due to bacteria in dogs mouth and you should never delay where eyes are concerned.
Would also tell them I wouldn't be visiting again unless dog was away in a separate room but they are welcome to visit, minus dog.
They need to acknowledge their dog needs some serious training, their apparent denial is dangerous and doing the dog no favours.
I could make excuses for dog, excitement, change to routine but I won't as why it bit is less important than ensuring you and DD are not at risk again.
please get your eye seen.........
Join the discussion
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.Register now
Already registered with Mumsnet? Log in to leave your comment or alternatively, sign in with Facebook or Google.
Please login first.