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Would you shag Santa?

(38 Posts)
SomeTiggyPudding Mon 24-Dec-12 22:47:41

And what would he be like?

Would he go "Ho Ho Ho"?

Would he empty his sack in your stockings?

Would you give him a mince pie afterwards to say thank you?

Yes, I know this thread is very unreasonable and definitely unseasonable. I just wondered.

ZebraInHiding Mon 24-Dec-12 22:49:42

Yes. But only because in thus house, Santa is Dh. Guess that makes me Mrs Claus! smile

BigShinyBaubles Mon 24-Dec-12 22:49:55

Just imagine how quick he would be!
If he can deliver all those presents in one night he must be over and done as quick as a flash in the bedroom.
I'd like to have a snuggle with him grin

BluelightsAndSirens Mon 24-Dec-12 22:50:35

I had a fleeting moment when I thought I had!

Took the DC to see Santa and he said "I know your mummy, we have met before"

DC were all ooohhhh and I'm thinking "no,surely not. You must be about 50, did I?"

He asked the DC to leave us alone and them admitted he lives down our road and recognised the DC from us walking to school/park.

Phewfuckingphew.

AgentZigzagHasABigYuleLog Mon 24-Dec-12 22:51:14

Depends on what he's got in his sack for me.

GilmoursPillow Mon 24-Dec-12 22:52:18

If Santa was DH or Felix Baumgartner then yes. If it's a fat stranger in a red suit and a white beard, then no.

Leverette Mon 24-Dec-12 22:52:42

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SantasHoHoHo Mon 24-Dec-12 22:53:44

You all ought to hang your head in shame!

poocatcherchampion Mon 24-Dec-12 22:56:46

Santa is my dad here so I'm going with no.

<gets out brain bleach>

SomeTiggyPudding Mon 24-Dec-12 22:57:03

Do you think his winkie looks like a candy cane?

scaevola Mon 24-Dec-12 23:01:21

DH has a FC costume. So I think I may be about to find out grin

KatyPeril Mon 24-Dec-12 23:02:42

Yes. Sadly though, I'm not sure there's many I'd turn down.

apostrophethesnowman Mon 24-Dec-12 23:04:49

ohhhh you're all sick!

SomeTiggyPudding Mon 24-Dec-12 23:04:59

I wouldn't. I don't do guys with beards. The most I would do is give him a blow job in the sleigh.

oopsiforgot Mon 24-Dec-12 23:05:55

Oh my God, what is wrong with me?? I definitely would!!! blush but not some random shopping centre fake bearded bloke, only the REAL one.

TheSecretSantaDNCOP Mon 24-Dec-12 23:06:26

I saw mummy sucking Santa off
Underneath the mistletoe tonight...

No way!! I cried one year in a local shop... so the Santa took his beard off .. it was my Grandad blush confused

The one in town though.... [thinks] Yeah I would jump his bones!

Yes, dh is currently wearing his Santas sack thong.

minge pie for afters if he was lucky thank you to SantaDNCOP for that one knew I could use it somewhere

TheCortanaThatStoleChristmas Mon 24-Dec-12 23:11:54

I am jealous of you scaevola, I have been dropping hints that DP should get a Santa costume. wink

SomeTiggyPudding Mon 24-Dec-12 23:12:01

When Santa got fucked up the chimney
He began to shout:
"You girl or boy, take your dick or that toy
And quickly pull it out!"

CatPussRoastingOnAnOpenFire Mon 24-Dec-12 23:14:10

Oh dear! grin

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Mon 24-Dec-12 23:14:18

the question is "would he want me to?" grin

ShiftyFades Mon 24-Dec-12 23:15:00

Ewwww, white haired, bearded, fat old man? Not a chance, never, not even when I'm grey Er, old Er and plumper than I already am!!

How on earth am I going to sleep with this thought in my head now? sad

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