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AIBU?

Anyone want to join me writing a Christmas murder mystery?

19 replies

ZumbaZara · 21/12/2012 16:57

The polite smiles hid so many secrets. The day of the Secret Santa draw was here. Everyone sttod waiting.
Arleen in the main office had created the spread sheet, but the lies,deception and scheming had started well before that.

OP posts:
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MoonlightMerrimentandMistletoe · 21/12/2012 23:09

Probably around the summer solstice - a fitting balance really, what started on the longest day would finish on the shortest.

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lovelyladuree · 21/12/2012 23:18

Then she pulled out her AK47 and shot every motherfucker in the room. The End.

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MoonlightMerrimentandMistletoe · 21/12/2012 23:24

Here, no-one told me it was flash fiction! Xmas Grin

So, for the next one, and no more than 400 words all in, the opening sentence is:

"Not even the Bounty lady dared risk it."...

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steppemum · 21/12/2012 23:32

No, no, ignore the AK47. I was looking forward to Arleen at the centre of a bribery scam about who wasn't going to get Jake as their Secret Santa, after what he did last year...

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MoonlightMerrimentandMistletoe · 21/12/2012 23:41

steppemum - do tell?

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quoteunquote · 21/12/2012 23:49

Agatha Christie always said that you write the story with the murder, gather everyone in plot together in a room,

Then decide which character is the least likely to of committed the murder, make them the murderer, go back and tweak the story to fit.

So if this story is set at christmas, then father Christmas is the murderer.

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steppemum · 22/12/2012 07:51

'As Jake walks through the room people involuntarily move away. He has the ability to make the most confident feel nervous. When he first arrived, he was popular, but after last year, well the incident with Gladys was just too off-beat for the most liberal of colleagues. Gladys never returned after Christmas, rumour has it that she is now living on a remote Scottish island with a flock of sheep.

As everyone stood around waiting, the CEO appeared at the door. 'Morning everyone, are you all ready? Jake my boy, so good to see you, Your mother is expecting you for drinks at 7 - don't forget'

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steppemum · 22/12/2012 09:06

(not sure when this is set, seems to be a bit a la agatha)

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Enfyshedd · 22/12/2012 14:26

Sharon checked her bag. Alongside the Secret Santa present waiting to be placed on the table was a heavyweight cream envelope with distinctive handwriting and Scottish postmark...

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steppemum · 22/12/2012 15:52

Mike leaned against the filing cabinet, eyes narrowed as he watched Kevin chatting amicably with his ex

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BumpingFuglies · 22/12/2012 17:05

It was me! I did it!

With A Sprout, in The Dining Room, whilst shagging Prof Plum. Grin

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MoonlightMerrimentandMistletoe · 22/12/2012 20:14

Slurred Tracy, while necking a bottle of cheap rose, her wig askew. The others turned to look at her, then went back to glancing at Jake.

Tracy threw the bottle against the wall, killing a dying wasp in the process.

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AhhYouWillYouWill · 22/12/2012 21:55

Arleen rushed in carrying a half filled sack of presents and glanced in surprise at the bottle of expensive bubbly on the table "Now that's a change" she wondered "who's splashed out on that?"

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steppemum · 22/12/2012 22:44

Tracy hiccuped loudly then noticed Jodie trying to hide in the corner

'Oh look at you quite posh with you clothes on aren't you? Enjoyed the Christmas party did you? Saw you with Jake (whispers) hope you didn't go back to his place, that's what Gladys did'

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MoonlightMerrimentandMistletoe · 22/12/2012 23:24

Jodie didn't answer, instead, checking the time and looking back at the door - the atmosphere began to thicken.

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FirmlyInTheClosetAsImAMonster · 22/12/2012 23:50

Jake glanced over, and wiggled his eyebrows at Jodie and Tracy. Suddenly, as if the eyebrows themselves had activated it, the lights shut off.

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BerlinerBelle · 23/12/2012 00:05

It was pitch dark and silence loomed.

"Oh Fuck!" A voice called out in the night. It sounded like Sharon from Merchandising

When the lights came on again, Sharon was standing by on top of the table, next to the trifle, with her skirt hitched up to her waist.

Kevin from the post room ran aghast into the now silent room.

"Brazilian" he shouted. And then fell to the floor.

The crowd gasped as they saw the bloodied dagger protruding from his back.

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steppemum · 23/12/2012 00:09

there was a crash a door banged and then the screetch of tyres on tarmac.

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FirmlyInTheClosetAsImAMonster · 23/12/2012 00:16

"Oh look it's 5 o'clock on a friday" Barry said to the suddenly more empty room. "Who just left!?" Sharon cried angrily, glancing from person to person.
"Most of the marketing team" replied Barry.

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