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To want DH to get a permenant job

(6 Posts)
TheGrinchWhoStoleXmas Thu 20-Dec-12 14:25:21

Rather than the series of part time temping jobs that always stop at really inconvenient times sad
He is currently a student, his course is only 3 days a week and he is doing very well on it and enjoying it.
But I work FT shifts, we have 2 DCs, and even with the amount of stuff in the home he does, we are really struggling at the moment.
And my wages are only just stretching to cover the basics, this month I'v been past my overdraft twice and have incurred charges because of it.
I am not feeling at all festive, DH is currently wrapping presents and I just cannot shrug the feeling of impending doom.
I know that furthering his education is better for us all in the long term, but AIBU to feel like he should jack in the course and get a FT permanent job?
not that i will ask him to but i need someone to tell me i am being very unreasonable

Theicingontop Thu 20-Dec-12 14:30:14

I was in the exact same position as you. The exact same. It did work out! But I was so tired of it and it caused so many arguments, I was just so stressed out about money. Not to mention the fact that while he was working part time and doing his course, he didn't lift a bloody finger in the house while I was doing 12 hour night shifts >sad

But if your DH is certain that this course will help, I say give him a chance. But you should be communicating, tell him you're under pressure and see if he can do anything to help, even if it's giving you a break or sitting with you to budget more efficiently so money isn't such a huge concern.

TheGrinchWhoStoleXmas Thu 20-Dec-12 14:41:30

He knows about the money situation, there's not a lot either of us can do about it. I did do some overtime shifts at work but they have now stopped offering overtime and i was completely knackered , and he is not getting as much work from his temping job as he was initially promised, the job finishes in Jan.
He is very easy going, and has offered to give up his car (we have 2 cars because there is very little public transport available), which would only serve to make life more difficult, but would save us a fortune.
I'm just worried sad

WeWilsonAMerryChristmas Thu 20-Dec-12 14:46:28

As long as he is pulling his weight at home, I think you have to suck it up, sorry! I do sympathise but I think you have to take the long-term view. In 5 years time, things will be different, kind of thing. And I'd get rid of the car. Im sure it is more convienient to have two, but do you really, really need 2?

TheGrinchWhoStoleXmas Thu 20-Dec-12 14:54:05

We can live with only 1 car, its a lot of hassle but I suppose the saving on the insurance will be worth it. Insurance is due in Jan so I'll just not renew it. Can I get a refund on the road tax?

Essexmamma Thu 20-Dec-12 15:23:12

Will the course definitely be worth it in the long run or is it a bit uncertain? If not guaranteed, have to say I'd be asking him to take responsibility and seriously consider priorities, I know how it is to not know how you will pay the bills next month and it's a terrible strain on the family. Can he not get extra work on a more permenant basis, something different, a couple of nights even? I think it's important the family financial burden is completely shared and not just on one party even if that does mean a few tough decisions and sacrifices. The long run is all very well but at what cost in the short term. Yanbu IMO

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