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AIBU?

To actually be considering a very real job opportunity in New York. Yikes.

18 replies

BlingLoving · 17/12/2012 21:48

It's super early days, but its possible I could be offered a job in New York. Great firm, amazing boss, good money (I assume although I have no idea what relocation package would be like). But its crazy : ds is 18 months and we have been thinking about getting on with another one, dh is a sahd so could move but would be entirely out of his comfort zone, we have pets who we might not be able to take with us....

On plus side, we've both always wanted an opportunity to live in New York. We do have one or two friends there so wouldn't be completely alone and from what i hear, New York is a ffriendly place.

But man, it's such a huge thing to even contemplate. Are we crazy? Should we be settling down with what we have? Enjoying ds and thinking about giving him a brother or sister? Will New York as parents of a young child be completely disappointing compared to our barely articulated but nonetheless glamourous dreams?

OP posts:
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ll31 · 17/12/2012 21:50

With kids that young virtually anywhere is fine, grab opportunity! Only thing is if you're having 2nd baby, american mat Leave is not good!

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LynetteScavo · 17/12/2012 21:51

I think it is possible to get pregnant and give birth in NewYork Grin.

This is not something you should pass up. It would be a great experience. And so much easier with an 18 month old than a teenager.

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LynetteScavo · 17/12/2012 21:52

I too was thinking American maternity leave is not good...but OP's DH is a SAHD, which will make things easier.

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McChristmasPants2012 · 17/12/2012 21:52

sound a wonderful opportunity.

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StuntGirl · 17/12/2012 21:54

I wouldn't pass up an opportunity like this! If its super terrible Britain will still be here if you want to come back Grin But seriously, go for it.

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clattypatty · 17/12/2012 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ImperialBlether · 17/12/2012 21:55

Sorry, I'm too jealous to reply.

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drcrab · 17/12/2012 21:57

You'll have to consider the lack of maternity leave and therefore even if dh is the sahp you'll still need time to recover from the birth, natural or otherwise.

If say you can afford to take 3 months no pay leave or save up to that amount, then go for it! Keep in mind also the fact that you'll have to take that amount of leave from work. Will they allow it?

Also where will your pay allow you to live? Will it be near work which may be in central ny so cost a lot of money for a 2 bed flat? Or will you commute? Do you currently live in a big city so you are used to it?

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emsyj · 17/12/2012 22:02

New York is so fabulous, go go go! And so friendly too - I went with a friend a couple of years ago and we didn't sit down for a single drink/dinner/lunch/coffee without being approached and chatted to.

As my DMum would say - nothing is carved in stone. If you hate it, you leave. If it all goes tits up, you leave. Make sure you put some money by to enable you to move if you need to - remembering obviously that the exchange rate will fluctuate and you may need a lot more to move back to the UK than you need to move UK to US. Then go, safe in the knowledge that if it doesn't work out, nothing lost.

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BlingLoving · 17/12/2012 22:02

The lack of ma leave is definitely a concern. Plus it's a pretty senior job so I wouldn't feel comfortable getting pregnant for at least a year as I'd need time to really settle into the job before I could start with the whole pregnancy thing followed by mat leave.

Living space is a huge issue. We would want to live in city - what's the point of moving to New York otherwise - but we currently live outside London and have the space efc that goes with that. Including the ability to let our cats out. One cat would not cope as an indoor car.

I have told them we are interested for all the reasons you've all mentioned. And it very well might not happen (they don't usually bring people from other countries so the hassle for them might put them off) but it still feels quite intense.

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TheCatInTheHairnet · 17/12/2012 22:05

As long as you realise that maternity leave is rubbish, there's nothing stopping you coming!

My only word of warning would be, if you're coming on an expat package in the current economy, have a back up plan and a healthy bank account to fall back on. I know a few expats who have been forced to go home recently as they were made redundant. NY is definitely not a good place to be unemployed in!

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Sonofagun · 17/12/2012 22:07

What do you do? I want a job in NYC Xmas Grin

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BerryLellow · 17/12/2012 22:07

You have to at least try - otherwise you'll always wonder 'what if...'

Go for it!

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Arthurfowlersallotment · 17/12/2012 22:37

OP I used to live in NYC. It's a fantastic city, very friendly and there is so much going on you will never be bored.

ML and annual leave sucks, and people really do live to work, but it's definitely a great experience. Space wise, Brooklyn has bigger properties than Manhattan and is not as expensive. It's also an easy commute and a very family friendly part of the city. (Williamsburg is really naice).

Just make sure you have air con/house in hamptons as the summers are disgusting. Good luck with whatever you decide.

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Tarenath · 17/12/2012 22:40

Do it! We've recently moved with DH's job. Make sure you get temporary accommodation with the relocation package until you get on your feet! We're really not city people so we're living in NJ and DH is commuting in. It's no worse than commuting in to London.

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PacificDogwood · 17/12/2012 22:43

Do it.

You'll regret more not having done it, than doing it and not liking it.

Mat leave, cats, future babies - all the practicalities can be sorted through if when you get the job.

Please, may I come?? Grin

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nooka · 17/12/2012 22:47

Your biggest issue will be getting a visa. It is very difficult getting into the States to work except through intracompany transfers, and if the company haven't done it before they may not realise how hard it can be.

Another thing for you to think about is that you will be somewhat in thrall to the company, as your visa will be totally tied to the company - if you lose your job for any reason you will have to leave the country. So you need to make sure you get a really good contract and everything about your package in writing (including repatriation arrangements).

I know that you said your dh was a SAHD but if he changed his mind and decided he did want to work it's worth knowing that it is highly unlikely that he would be allowed to do so (most temporary workers get a H1b visa, if you are can be proven to be exceptional then you might get an O1 visa - neither of which would allow your husband to work).

New York is fun although very expensive. We lived in Queens for a while, and I've a cousin who lives near Prospect Park in Brooklyn which seems to be a very child friendly area (we thought was somewhat like North London).

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Nancy66 · 17/12/2012 22:57

I worked in NY for a year and it was amazing. I was single with no kids though.

Holiday allowance is shite too - 2 weeks a year on average.

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