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To have filmed my ds1s preschool nativity play even though

(283 Posts)
Nooneelseisallowedafergus Sat 08-Dec-12 13:58:40

We were expressly told no filming.

I did zoom in on just him ( as much as was possible ) and only filmed a few short clips, not the whole event.

I felt I would have really regretted not having captured the memory, and my son loves watching himself on film, and has already enjoyed watching the clips and singing along to the songs.

And I just don't see how a video of fully clothed children would be satisfying viewing for a peadophile. With this vein of thought surely we should start making our children wear burkas.

ilovesooty Sat 08-Dec-12 14:56:34

If they are purely for you and you children to view, then there isn't any risk

But how on earth could the school know that?

saintlyjimjams Sat 08-Dec-12 14:56:45

I think foster parents aren't allowed to give permission for filming. Ds1's school has the rule because they have fostered children attending, ds2 and ds3's school allow filming (quick chance for anyone to object before the performance) because there are no fostered children.

I find the performances without all the shuffling to get the best shot better tbh smile

WorraLorraTurkey Sat 08-Dec-12 14:58:53

Laurie read my post again.

The kids do take part...just not in the public performance.

Their parents/carers get to see them perform in the school performance which is exactly the same.

TantrumsAndBalloons Sat 08-Dec-12 14:59:40

What if the op shows it to her family and friends and someone recognizes a child and passes that info on to someone else?

The reason for no filming is because there are too many "what ifs"

DameMargotFountain Sat 08-Dec-12 15:01:12

i'm really angry that i fell for this thread too

<brings mulled wine>

Nooneelseisallowedafergus Sat 08-Dec-12 15:01:22

I just had to sort some laundry - hope that doesn't breach any child protection laws.

Thank you for your informative replies. I didn't actually think about the child protection thing. I just assumed it was peadophile prevention policy. PPP.

Anyway. They did allow photos of your own child, as much as was possible on a crowded stage, but no filming. So I can't really see the difference? They did ask us not to put any photos on any social media sites, and of course I won't do that. (even though two of my friends have done this, but instagrammed the other children's faces to make them blurry).

The clips are just for me and my immediate family to enjoy.

But I do take on board all your advise. But still confused how photos are ok but not videos.

SugaricePlumFairy Sat 08-Dec-12 15:02:12


The school forbid any filming.

OP said bollocks to that, I'm filming anyway!

Great respect towards the school. hmm

Nooneelseisallowedafergus Sat 08-Dec-12 15:02:42

And I am not a troll. Just naive.

WorraLorraTurkey Sat 08-Dec-12 15:04:39

Photos are allowed but not videos because it's quite simple to photograph just your own child.

If you're videoing your child walking across the stage and doing whatever their part in the play consists of, you're going to get the faces of a whole lot of others in the shot.

It's not rocket science OP.

WorraLorraTurkey Sat 08-Dec-12 15:06:29

Plus there's sound

So when the teacher mentions "The children here at blah blah school", anyone viewing it on a social media site will know.

Nooneelseisallowedafergus Sat 08-Dec-12 15:06:38

Ok. I admit. IABU.

But the video is sooooo sweet.

RooneyMara Sat 08-Dec-12 15:07:07

Unreasonable and not too bright.

RooneyMara Sat 08-Dec-12 15:08:02

Oh, x posts.

ilovesooty Sat 08-Dec-12 15:08:21

But the video is sooooo sweet

Oh, well that's ok then. hmm

WorraLorraTurkey Sat 08-Dec-12 15:08:27

Everyone thinks their own child is sweet....I'm sure we all do.

However, I tend to view other people's children as annoying little snot bubbles on legs grin

atacareercrossroads Sat 08-Dec-12 15:09:03

In that case op its more likely imo that the school have made a dvd of it and want to rinse the parents of a tenner in the run up to xmas

I honestly don't see the issue as long as you're not one of these parents who shares every aspect of your kids life with the world.

DoesntTurkeyNSproutSoupDragOn Sat 08-Dec-12 15:09:13

instagram is not a verb

YABU for that alone.

Angelico Sat 08-Dec-12 15:09:33

OP I don't know if you are being unreasonable - my first ever sit on fence in 'AIBU'! I'm very dubious of the child protection argument when so many schools do their own recordings and then flog them to parents. And I can totally understand that you would want to record your own child - I would feel exactly the same.

The flip side is that the consequences can potentially be so severe. IMHO it would be better to allow parents to film but ban them uploading - but then it relies on parents making sensible decisions and not being twats and for some this is impossible

So OP I guess my point is I sympathise with your frustration!

RooneyMara Sat 08-Dec-12 15:10:49

Look OP I'd imagine that if any of the other parents noticed you filming it, they probably think less of you because you chose to break the rules while they respectfully adhered to them...what makes you so special that you should be allowed to do this while they're not?

I'm just boggling at your sense of entitlement. Though I am glad to see you accept you were unreasonable from the CP perspective.

MissVerinder Sat 08-Dec-12 15:11:05

As a foster carer of I would go ballistic if ant school tried to say my dc couldn't take part (as in worras example). Looked after children have enough to cope with without schools discriminating against them

^^ What Laurie said with (jingle) bells on.

OP you are being unreasonable. And selfish and thoughtless etc etc.

chrismissymoomoomee Sat 08-Dec-12 15:11:30

Oh you should have said the video was sooooo sweet YANBU at all hmm

RooneyMara Sat 08-Dec-12 15:12:25

And of course, there's the yearly thread titled 'AIBU to upload my recording of the nativity on FB?' After all, the school shouldn't have allowed filming if they didn't want people to share footage...

do you see the problem.

TandB Sat 08-Dec-12 15:12:53

The problem is that if you are the kind of person who is prone to such major attacks of PFBitis that you just can't control yourself and find yourself overcome with the need to ignore the no filming rule, you are probably also going to be vulnerable to just not being ale to resist the urge to put it on facebook.

The school can't control what people do with the film once they have it, so they are trying to stop it being taken in the first place.

SorryMyCandyCaneLollipop Sat 08-Dec-12 15:13:41


I have two adopted children who could be easily recognised and traced by their birth family if they were spotted on an "innocent" clip like this.

Schools have rules to protect children like mine.

It makes me very cross that some people just don't bloody think.

WorraLorraTurkey Sat 08-Dec-12 15:13:49

Do jingle bells prevent you from reading?

<< Confuddled >>

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