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AIBU to breastfeed my toddler in public?

(368 Posts)
RainbowsFriend Mon 03-Dec-12 21:10:14

My 18 month DD still breastfeeds a lot. Day and night, if I'm around and not at work.

I don't have a problem with this, (although I would like more sleep! grin) but it's increasingly becoming awkward when out and about, as toddlers don't cuddle in nicely but squirm and pop on and off a lot.

Today we were in a garden centre cafe, and having polished off most of her lunch, half of my sandwiches AND most of a flapjack, DD wanted mummy milk.
So I obliged. As discreetly as possible with one top up/ on top down, DD tucked in under my jumper and facing a wall.

Then all I can hear is the group of mums on the table behind me saying "it shouldn;t be allowed when they're that age - they should be down to morning and evening feeds MAXIMUM - in fact they should be on formula/cows milk by 6 months/a year" etc. There were about 5 mums all loudly discussing it....

I think my daughter should be allowed mummy milk for as long as she wants it personally. She's not still going to be feeding aged 8 - and she's only 18 months now! I am getting VERY fed up with stares when this happens and really don't want to be confined to the house. I could ask her to wait, but she doesn't really understand that yet - and just asks louder and louder grin

So WIBU to feed her in public?

squeakytoy Mon 03-Dec-12 21:11:35

Cant you express some and take it out with you?

And the expression "mummy milk" is a bit icky...

HairyGrotter Mon 03-Dec-12 21:11:51

No, do what suits you and DD, sod everyone else.

I never had these comments, pains me that I didn't cause I'm all about 'WTF did you just say'. Shame really

Sirzy Mon 03-Dec-12 21:12:21

Ignore them. As long as you are happy and more importantly your daughter is happy sod everyone else.

You made the effort to be discrete and nobody was forcing them to look.

mrskeithrichards Mon 03-Dec-12 21:12:47

I'm pretty sure no one said anything.

LivvyPsMum Mon 03-Dec-12 21:12:50

I love to see babies breastfeeding, but tbh I hate to see older babies/toddlers doing it. Sorry. I think it just looks wrong. You weren't being unreasonable though. That is just my opinion and obviously the opinion of the women discussing it, but in reality its no one else's business.

Iggly Mon 03-Dec-12 21:13:10

Why is mummy milk icky?

That's what it is hmm

Why should she express? When toddler has a perfectly good method for getting it out.


Wisteria36 Mon 03-Dec-12 21:13:39

No, if more of us did perhaps people wouldn't make these comments. It's none of their business and 18 months is not even very old imo!

dwagdays Mon 03-Dec-12 21:13:48

Not at all unreasonable.
Nothing to do with anyone else.

Coconutty Mon 03-Dec-12 21:14:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertieBotts Mon 03-Dec-12 21:15:23

Not at all - I did up until DS was at the age where he only wanted it at home which was somewhere between 18 months and 2, and after then on the very rare occasion he really wanted it and nothing else would do. Mostly nobody even noticed TBH. It's not like you need to stand up and announce "BTW I'm going to feed my two year old now with my boobs, I hope none of you are offended!"

18 months is barely a toddler confused My friend used to feed her 18 month old all the time and nobody batted an eyelid.

yousankmybattleship Mon 03-Dec-12 21:15:39

Yes YABU. Totally inappropriate. As you said, your child was not hungry. It is not like feeding a baby who needs it.

LadyBeagleBaublesandBells Mon 03-Dec-12 21:15:49

YABU to use the expression Mummymilk.
What's wrong with breastmilk?

ChippingInLovesAutumn Mon 03-Dec-12 21:16:34

YANBU to bf her in public.

YABU if you expect everyone else to think it's great.

It's entirely up to you what you do about that though.

RainbowsFriend Mon 03-Dec-12 21:17:23

DD can't say breastmilk, and it's what she says when she doesn't want cows milk, but my milk so...

... I think it's better than what some of her little friends do - which is shout "boobies!" grin

skislope Mon 03-Dec-12 21:17:26

I still feed my 18 month DD myself and she also has cow's milk. Wouldn't occur to me to express, that was enough of a hassle when she was exclusively fed!! :-S Honestly I don't think it's a big deal to see an 18 month old being breastfeed, am surprised people commented? Weirdos!

BertieBotts Mon 03-Dec-12 21:17:50

Because it's not about food at that age, battleship. Denying it is like denying a cuddle to a child who isn't breastfed - they do need it. The fact you can wean them off that need is beside the point, OP has chosen not to and that is a valid choice.

(I'm going to be here all night now aren't I? grin)

3monkeys3 Mon 03-Dec-12 21:18:56

YANBU at all. I can't believe the attitudes of some people. 18 months is still a baby.

FredKiller Mon 03-Dec-12 21:19:00

I feed my 18mo out and about when he asks (which isn't that often now tbh). I neither notice nor give a toss what anyone else says or thinks. I certainly couldn't be arsed to express and carry milk around with me.

BertieBotts Mon 03-Dec-12 21:19:26

"Mummy milk" is twee but so are lots of toddler sayings. I found "milk" was sufficient but "mummy milk" was a useful clarifier.

squeakytoy Mon 03-Dec-12 21:19:45

I will always be of the view that if they are old enough to ask for it, they are too old to be doing it.

So shoot me.

Coconutty Mon 03-Dec-12 21:19:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tailtwister Mon 03-Dec-12 21:21:05

Yanbu. If people don't like it that's their problem. Seriously, why should you give a shit what some random people think? You are doing what you think best for your child. They should butt out and concentrate on theirs. I would have turned around and called them on it. I do wonder about the skewed attitudes some people have about breastfeeding. Very ignorant and misinformed.

LadyBeagleBaublesandBells Mon 03-Dec-12 21:21:26

Yea, but you're not 18 months old op, and you're on an adult forum.
The expression mummymilk just irks.
Apart from that do what you like, and ignore though I'm always surprised the number of people out there who make loud judgements about perfect strangers.

iwillsleepagainsomeday Mon 03-Dec-12 21:22:11

just ignore.
can't see why it's more logical to feed a human child cows milk rather than human milk. But hey that's me.

In any case, even if people do not like seeing someone bf a toddler (A couple of years ago I would have thought the same simply because I was ignorant and not used to it) they should not be so rude as to point their opinion out so in your face.

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