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AIBU?

to take my DD to the doctors/HV

17 replies

WorriedMumNeedsHelp · 28/11/2012 20:53

I have name changed.

Around 8 weeks a go my DD aged 3 managed to lock herself with the key into my walk in wardrobe.

Since then she is afraid of the dark, will not stay in her bedroom on her own and crys until she comes into my bed. When i get her she is literally shaking.

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AnyoneforTurps · 28/11/2012 21:01

What are you expecting the GP/HV to do?

stargirl1701 · 28/11/2012 21:04

She's clearly had a fright. It will pass. You need to acknowledge her fears and help her see they are groundless. Don't bring it up unless she does.

I don't think a doc could do much tbh.

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 28/11/2012 21:04

I don't think a GP would necessarily be able to help, but if you're really worried and don't know how to tackle it yourself (to be fair, I wouldn't either) a child therapist might be able to help. Better able to help than a GP, anyway.

frogspoon · 28/11/2012 21:05

They could probably refer her to a counsellor/ child psychologist. If her reaction happens every night and has been going on for 2 months it may help to see a professional who is an expert in helping young children with phobias (which it sounds like this could be).

WorriedMumNeedsHelp · 28/11/2012 21:05

I am not sure tbh.

I am just very worried about her, I am very tired at the moment and i am not thinking straight.

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Sirzy · 28/11/2012 21:06

I don't think a GP could do much at this stage. It is pretty normal for children to be afraid of the dark really.

I assume you have things like a night light for her?

Floralnomad · 28/11/2012 21:06

Has she got a nightlight? I also can't see what a dr/HV could do .

Sirzy · 28/11/2012 21:07

And have you tried reading stories like "The Owl who was afraid of the dark?"

Read them during the day and talk about how the owl was feeling and try to get her to talk that way

WorriedMumNeedsHelp · 28/11/2012 21:09

not tried books like that, but could go to the library tomorrow to get some. I have got her a nightlight.

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DeWe · 28/11/2012 21:09

Depends on your GP/HV really.

I know ours would take it seriously and discuss methods of dealing with it (he's got 4 dc and knows that sort of thing).

If they're just going to go "one of those things, will grow out of it", it isn't much point.

I would move her bed (or the mattress) into your room, or get her a night light that stays on. Perhaps a special toy that "watches over her" and let her feel that she's welcome there as long as she needs to be.

ooer · 28/11/2012 21:12

Poor wee thing. 8 weeks is a long time. (I am still a bit claustrophobic after being shut inside a box-seat at a similar age!)

Do you know how long she was in the wardrobe? Did you talk with her about how she felt scared because she was locked in? Could you gradually work up to getting her used to seeing you go into the wardrobe and joining you when she feels like it?

Presumably when she is in your bed she is not afraid of the dark. It's bedtime and it's supposed to be dark so we can go to sleep.

But by all means speak to the HV - YANBU.

Floralnomad · 28/11/2012 21:12

What about one of those toys that has a light in them ,bedroom door open and hall light on . Do you think it's possible that it started off as fear and is now habit?

WorriedMumNeedsHelp · 28/11/2012 21:16

she was locked in for about 5 minutes, DH had to break the door down.

The toy sounds a good idea. I will get her one of them and some books.

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Salamanger · 28/11/2012 21:17

I would expect a GP could refer to appropriate department if you can get them to understand it is affecting normal life and causing her distress.

It's sounds more serious than just children's normal fear. I remember DD after I tried to bath her with v sore bottom- she was hysterical at bathtimes for a couple of weeks. If you don't make a big deal it might pass. Would she settle for a lamp on that you could then phase out over time?

Persuasion · 28/11/2012 21:21

Worth a try, GP or health visitor can refer to CAMHS (child and adolescent mental health) at the right level. They're honestly not scary (i'm working there at the moment!) but the sooner you deal with it the easier it wil be sorted, may well only take a few sessions to come up with a practical plan that helps you help her.

drivingmisspotty · 28/11/2012 21:24

If you're worried and it's tiring you both out I think you should go to Dr. The worst they can do is tell you not to worry or they might be able to refer you to a counselor or play therapist who could help. If it was me I would go without my dd, though, as it would stress her out more if she knew I was worried.

In meantime I second talking about it, nightlight s (can she have a torch or lamp she cAn control herself?) And reassuring her you are available in night. Maybe get baby monitor out again so you can hear her early or sleep in her room for a bit so she feels more comfortable there. (Aware you have probably tried all of this!)

Good luck

WorriedMumNeedsHelp · 28/11/2012 21:26

thankyou all.

will go to the HV as seeing her is a walk in clinic where a doctor appoinment can take up to 3 weeks

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