Advanced search

to bugger off and leave DP with DS over night? -long

(149 Posts)
lola88 Sat 24-Nov-12 15:29:57

not so much AIBU but should i?

DP seriously thinks maternity leave is a year long holiday and i sit about watch telly and drinking cups of tea all day. DS still doesn't sleep through the night at 10mo but i quote 'it's not like you have anything to do in the day' so it doesn't matter that i'm constantly shattered because i'll obviously just be sitting around all day and can sleep when i want. Obviously this is bull i hardly sit down these days.

So last night i stayed with my mum as i had the downstairs carpets cleaned and it's not practical keeping a crawling baby off the floor for 24 hours so DP got a full sleep andd lie in, i got 5 hours sleep and up at 7. Dp went out with his mum at 2 taking DS with him as i said i didn't want to go (came home for some peace) DP has already been on the phone complaining that DS has been screaming his head off because he was woken up from a nap to early rookie error and when he comes home it's my turn.

My mums invited me round to hers tonight as she's having a few friends over and said i should stay to let DP see what it's really like being me (he's never been up in the night then got up in the morning) I had said no as i'm worried that DP won't cope with no sleep and i was away from home last night but after this whining phone call about the baby crying and it being stressful as if i've never had to deal with it i'm thinking about going round to stay at my mums.

DP said i should go tonight when i told him about it last night so he won't object so should i chuck him head first in the deep end and just go out?

TeeHollyandTeeIvy Sat 24-Nov-12 15:31:25

Hand the baby over and walk out the door. Turn off your mobile.

Try to be gone for more than one day.


lookingfoxy Sat 24-Nov-12 15:32:32

Yes go.
And don't be back first thing in the morning either.

3littlefrogs Sat 24-Nov-12 15:33:53

Absolutely. GO.

You need a break, and your DP needs to learn to be a parent.

Kafri Sat 24-Nov-12 15:34:10

Go for it!! Your nights out are few and far between. DP is a big boy, he'll cope.
If he's capable of making the baby, he's capable of taking care of the baby!

And, if he sees its not all a walk in the park (not that I'm saying you don't enjoy it, just that its not always easy).....BONUS!!!

EasilyBored Sat 24-Nov-12 15:35:21

Go. Have a good time and a decent lie in the next day.

ScrambledSmegs Sat 24-Nov-12 15:35:46

Do it. You need proper rest. He needs to learn what a twat he is bond with his son.

Win/win grin

FluffyJawsOfDoom Sat 24-Nov-12 15:37:51

Go! And ask him to do the washing up/laundry/whatever task you usually have to do but which he'll find impossible while watching dc grin wink

YourHandInMyHand Sat 24-Nov-12 15:38:18

Definitely go! Cannot believe baby has got to 10 months and he has never got up in the night and then up in the morning. I'm sorry but that's pretty shitty of him!

Give him a taste of his own smug ignorant medicine!

Besides, I'm assuming you haven't had any "time off" in 10 months. Can't exactly begrudge you an evening at your mums can he!

Does he think DS sits cooing during the day and lets you have a catch up on the sleep you've missed during the night?? hmm

LemonBreeland Sat 24-Nov-12 15:40:00

Go Go Go!!! He can't screw up too much in one night and he may respect you a little more tomorrow.

Make sure you turn your phone off or he will be begging you to come home at 6am tomorrow.

UrbanSpaceManBaby Sat 24-Nov-12 15:40:07

Go, I'm No 8, your mum says go, what are you waiting for...

Hopeforever Sat 24-Nov-12 15:40:58

What are you waiting for, get your bag and go

5madthings Sat 24-Nov-12 15:43:37

go go go!

he will learn and its about time he does (your dh i mean)

Euphemia Sat 24-Nov-12 15:47:14

I second turning your phone off! Does he think women are born knowing how to look after babies?! He needs to learn, what to do if DS screams, etc., just like you did!

CouthyMowEatingBraiiiiinz Sat 24-Nov-12 15:47:18

Go! There's no better way for your DH to see what it is really like to get up at the arse-crack of dawn after a broken night's sleep.

Plus you'll get to enjoy yourself having a night off, AND get a lie in.

Don't forget to throw a few everyday jobs at him that you need done as you leave the door, like washing up, hoovering, a load or two of washing...


CaroleService Sat 24-Nov-12 15:59:51


lola88 Sat 24-Nov-12 16:16:02

I've just txt to say i'm going round.

He's not a bad guy he just has no idea what i do all day because he's never had to do more than one thing at a time, he has DS and thats all or we go out he cleans up. Childcare cleaning up cooking and all on hardly any sleep will deff give him a shock... or i will come back to shithole with him handing DS over before hiding in bed for a week

lola88 Sat 24-Nov-12 16:21:02

txt back saying ok but can you put DS to bed because i've had him all day eh since 2 not all day i txt back saying it's your turn for bedtime he txt back saying but DS will have missed you he's not seen you for ages n won't see you til whatever time tomorrow, so then i txt back saying that was a nice guilt trip thanks then he txt back never mind i'm just thinking of DS...HAHAHA and the games begin smile

forevergreek Sat 24-Nov-12 16:27:30

just say, he will be fine, give me a call before bed and i can always say night to him on the phone. have fun, see you both tomorrow

TeeHollyandTeeIvy Sat 24-Nov-12 16:28:41

Turn off your mobile!

longjane Sat 24-Nov-12 16:32:21

turn your mobile off and go out

have a lovely evening and sleep

StuntGirl Sat 24-Nov-12 16:32:46

Another one agreeing you should go, turn off your mobile and don't rush back in the morning. You can deal with your son because you learnt how to by doing it every day. Your partner needs to know how to deal with your son alone too!

MrsTerryPratchett Sat 24-Nov-12 16:37:50

I get that with bedtime. 'Oh, you haven't spent as much time with her, you should do bedtime'. He thinks he's being crafty.

Go and have a lovely time.

Euphemia Sat 24-Nov-12 16:38:58

And he needs to do it properly, with maturity and dignity, not turning the place into a bombsite, DS filthy, etc., and moaning and whinging that he's just not as good at it as you, you've had more practice, wah wah wah!

AnyFucker Sat 24-Nov-12 16:42:08

turn off your phone (tell him why...he is being an arse and spoiling your child free time on purpose) and don't roll back home until you have had a proper lie in and a leisurely breakfast

that should bring you until about 2pm Sunday, not a minute before

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now