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to be slightly suspicious of men who say they only like women with long hair?

(91 Posts)
FeuDeRussie Thu 22-Nov-12 10:03:36

I think it's fair enough to have certain preferences when it comes to what kind of look you like, but to say that you only like long hair on women, irrespective of whether it suits them or not, is a bit hmm IMO.

(Prompted by a friend who said today: 'sometimes I think women cut their hair too short, and it's like they're cutting off some of their beauty'...)

Ephiny Thu 22-Nov-12 11:49:31

It is a bit weird that a husband won't 'let' his wife have her hair cut. Like I said, DH likes short androgynous cuts, but I like my hair a bit longer because IMO it suits me better and I like to be able to put it in a ponytail. He wouldn't dream of complaining or ordering me to cut it shock.

There's nothing wrong with having a preference though.

PickledFanjoCat Thu 22-Nov-12 11:50:41

Oh my god cheaters was hilarious.

I watched it once and that bloke (the annoying presenter) got SHOT!!

Anyway we all prefer different things on our paramours. If that's all it is I think it's not a problem?

ChestnutsRoastingonaWitchesTit Thu 22-Nov-12 11:52:06

Long hair. As long as its only on their head right?

2rebecca Thu 22-Nov-12 11:54:49

My husband likes my hair to look sleek and straight (he's never commented on the length but I don't like it above my shoulders, too many years of having very short hair cuts as a child and being asked if I'm a boy) it rarely looks like that though as I'm lazy and straighteners turn my hair to straw. I prefer his a bit longer and usually me saying "your hair is looking good" is followed by him saying "I'm getting it cut tomorrow" as he prefers it shorter.
Expressing a preference in your partner's hair is fine, expecting them to put your hair preference above their own is strange and controlling.

Chandon Thu 22-Nov-12 11:57:26

I actually know what OP means.

i think to have long ahir as a requirement, means that the bloke in question would only want a woman * who is keen to please her man*, so he sees the long hair as a symbol of a kind of subservience. Whereas very short hair, and say, tough boots denote a woman is maybe more independent and not keen to just please men ( though some men, the nic kind, LIKE this sort of women exactly because they do not try to please...)

Though I may well be talking bollocks. grin

DS who is 10 has a crush on a girl with really long hair, and he dreams of touching it. it is a sensual thing, isn't it?

whatacolddaytoday Thu 22-Nov-12 11:59:43

Interesting thread! Its just a preference though, like some women will go on about "men in uniforms" or "grungy blokes" or whatever? smile I mean our appearance (men and women) is never going to be everyone's cup of tea so we just have to work out what WE like and stick with it? I like fairish, tall, slightly slimmer than average men. I get a good "phwoar" reaction when they are like that. Doesn't mean everyone who isn't like that is unattractive, indeed they probably don't give a shite about whether or not I fancy/approve or not!

My flatmate loves big women, as in big/tall and that's ok. I'm a smallish size but that's just genes - I don't diet and I'm athletic and strong and it's a bit peculiar that anyone attracted to me would have to justify their preferences! I must admit I personally wouldn't be attracted to a "larger man" as in plumpish - I like them lean and toned, no belly or whatever.

I have uber short hair and interestingly, I think men who "generally" have a preference for long hair appreciate it? As in, in "words" in sounds bad but it really suits my face, draws attention to my eyes, and fits well into my overall look. I mean I might slightly be more attracted to a lover if they dressed a certain way or something, but I think everyone just looks at the "overall package" when it comes to attraction! smile

honeytea Thu 22-Nov-12 12:02:40

YABU, I like men with short hair and no beard, that's just what I like.

Those people saying they are suspicious of men who fancy slim slight young looking women maybe that is just what they like or they met those women and fell for them rather than their child like hips.

How many of your partners prefere no/little hair on your vagina, I find that much more suspicious than a man loving a woman with a boyish/girlsih figure.

WorraLiberty Thu 22-Nov-12 12:03:20

When a woman says her DH 'won't let her have her haircut' you automatically take that completely literally?

Like when someone says, "If you do that again I'm going to scream" you automatically cover your ears and brace yourself?

Or do you think there's just a teensy chance she's saying her DH doesn't want her to have her hair cut but it's down to her what she does with her own hair?

HipHopOpotomus Thu 22-Nov-12 12:04:28

I think anyone who "only likes women who ..........(insert specific look)" is suspect.

What if their partner cut her hair or changed her look? Would he then look for another relationship? If so that is misogynistic and controlling behaviour and he would be considered an utter shit by me. If not, then clearly the statement "only likes women with long hair" is a falsehood.

It's a daft thing to say. hmm

treaclesoda Thu 22-Nov-12 12:05:56

I think its just a preference. My DH doesn't really like short hair on women, but he wouldn't dream of not 'allowing' me to get it cut. Its just his preference. Just as I don't really like anything other than extremely short hair on men.

He also has preferences when it comes to my clothes, in that he will say 'you look gorgeous in that' when I wear something he particularly likes. But he doesn't try to control the way I dress. And he doesn't have old fashioned views about a woman's role or anything like that.

I think, culturally, women first began cutting their hair in vast numbers after the end of WW1 and it was all part of a massive change that the war had brought about regarding women's place in society, so I suppose traditionally cutting your hair can be seen as quite a strong statement. I personally know many Christian women who aren't allowed to get their hair cut at all (not even trimmed, or a fringe cut in) for religious reasons, so for some people it is quite a big deal.

Fakebook Thu 22-Nov-12 12:06:31

Why suspicious? What do you think they will do with the hair? Strangle them or something? confused.

Spuddybean Thu 22-Nov-12 12:22:15

well HipHop, if DP changed his look drastically like grew his hair long or got covered in tattoos then yes i think i would leave him. i couldn't bare to look at him.

BunnyLebowski Thu 22-Nov-12 12:24:25

That's alright Spuddy. Long hair and tattoos you say?

I'll take him off your hands grin

FredFredGeorge Thu 22-Nov-12 12:24:59

The people saying it's suspicious to go for a particular look are pretty odd - and very insulting to people who have that look. Do you really want to suggest the small athletic "boyish" figure is only attractive to those men who would are actually only interested in children? And the women with those figures are just ugly to all "normal" men?

toofattorun Thu 22-Nov-12 12:26:37

The man said "sometimes" so why are you changing it to all the bloody time?
Are you upset because your hair isn't as long as he'd like?

Disappointedbuyer Thu 22-Nov-12 12:28:44

Where are all these men who like long hair. I have never meet one. Mine is longish and women are constantly complimenting me on it, but no man ever has. DH wants me to get a crew cut and just moans about my hair getting tangled round the hoover.

Disappointedbuyer Thu 22-Nov-12 12:29:05


Spuddybean Thu 22-Nov-12 12:31:29

ha bunny! you'd be welcome, especially if you swapped for one with short hair a beard and glasses. all 3 long term partners have had that, it's my holy trinity! smile

FellatioNelson Thu 22-Nov-12 12:34:18

Hmmm...I don't know. Sme as saying you only like slim women, or big chested women - I understand why it may sound sexist but frankly if a woman can reserve the right to say she could never fancy a man with a big beard, or one who was under 5' 3" then I don't really see the difference.

dexter73 Thu 22-Nov-12 12:35:39

My dh has grown a moustache for Movember and I hate it! I have told him he is never doing it again - luckily he hates it too!

2rebecca Thu 22-Nov-12 12:36:29

I don't see anything surprising about people possibly not fancying their partner as much if they totally changed their look. Part of what attracts us to each other is our appearance and the image we project.
If my fit sporty bloke became a couch potato and put on 10 stones I wouldn't feel the same way about him, in many ways he wouldn't be the same person.
No longer fancying someone just because they change their hair style is strange though.

2rebecca Thu 22-Nov-12 12:39:15

I hate moustaches and am very glad my husband isn't into charity gimmicks.
Let's all look creepy to promote men's issues yuk, just give a donation.

BunnyLebowski Thu 22-Nov-12 12:44:56

Spuddy I can do you bald, a beard and glasses wink grin

dexter73 Thu 22-Nov-12 12:45:01

Blimey he doesn't look creepy, it is just a bit bristly!

Alisvolatpropiis Thu 22-Nov-12 12:48:15

Do moustaches equate to men looking creepy?

My OH is also doing one for Movember. He can't wait to shave it off and so I've remained largely quiet on how much I don't like it. But I don't think he looks creepy!

Father Christmas has a moustache and a beard! grin

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