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I can take it if I am

(21 Posts)
HecatePropylaea Tue 20-Nov-12 14:50:43

12 year old with autism & ADHD. Such high needs that he is full time 1:1 and 2:1 off site.

Is it reasonable to say that part of what his 1:1 should do is support him to ensure that he doesn't keep losing his bloody stuff!

Jumper. Coat. etc.

Ordinarily yes, it would be the responsibility of the child. But when that child is unable to function at school without the constant presence, support and assistance of an adult who is assigned to him and him alone, is it reasonable to say that that adult should be aware that they need to get him to check he's not left his stuff lying about?

GleamingHeels Tue 20-Nov-12 15:00:07


StripyShoes Tue 20-Nov-12 15:01:00


Catsdontcare Tue 20-Nov-12 15:01:43


AmberLeaf Tue 20-Nov-12 15:02:53

On the whole YANBU. However if it was a case of 1-1 prioritising your sons immediate needs over coat etc checks then its undertsandable.

But if it is a regular thing then YABU

AmberLeaf Tue 20-Nov-12 15:03:29

oops sorry last bit should have been YANBU!

TaggieCampbellBlackFriday Tue 20-Nov-12 15:03:44

I woild be wonderi.g how? If 1:1. How do things get lost?

Poledra Tue 20-Nov-12 15:03:49

YANBU. Would say that, while it is perhaps not his 1:1's responsibility to pick up after him, it is their responsibility to nag remind him every bloody minute as often as required that he needs to be collecting up his stuff.

NatashaBee Tue 20-Nov-12 15:05:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TaggieCampbellBlackFriday Tue 20-Nov-12 15:05:30

And is 1:1 there for safety or to guide and teach? If the 2nd I think maybe part of learning is the social norm of not losing belongings.

TaggieCampbellBlackFriday Tue 20-Nov-12 15:06:14

Sorry. Does that make sense. V tired.

CailinDana Tue 20-Nov-12 15:06:54

It depends. His LSA might not be with him during times where he tends to lose stuff - in the morning before lessons start, during breaktime and lunchtime etc. Do you meet his LSA on the way into school every morning? It might be worth having a word with him/her and saying "These are the things he has today, he's always losing them, can you help him to keep track of them and maybe check that he has them before he goes home?" then let her know what he has with him. If the LSA doesn't see him till after assembly she might not know that his coat, jumper etc are going walkabout.

3b1g Tue 20-Nov-12 15:09:10

Can this be added to his IEP? It would make sure that everyone is aware of it at least. And YANBU.

takataka Tue 20-Nov-12 15:16:06

Have you asked the 1 on 1 person to make sure he doesn't loose his stuff? He/she might not realise it is an issue if you haven't said

From what I have seen of 1on1 teachers/TAs, it is pretty full on and I don't think that this has slipped by is terrible. It doesn't need to be a big deal I don't think?

Kafri Tue 20-Nov-12 15:27:09

Hi, YADNBU! I work with kids with Autism and challenging behaviour on a 1:1, 2:1 basis so I'm working on similar needs to your son. I always make sure I knw what my boys have with them to ensure it all returns safely. Whether its coats/hats etc or other things like transition items or comm aids.

That being said, there has been the odd occasion where things have been put down and left - I.e getting everyone organised at the swimming pool but its never a case of things going missing - and honesty with my boys parents 'I'm really sorry, I'm nipping back to the pool' is always appreciated.

The only thing we manage to 'lose' are board maker symbols so I spend many an evening reprinting, laminating and Velcro ing symbols to keep comm aids complete. ;-)

HecatePropylaea Tue 20-Nov-12 16:04:31

Sorry. Had to go on school run!

Yes, it's happened a few times now. He started there in September.

And yes, his 1:1 is for the entire school day. I handover in the morning and he is 1:1 until he is handed over at the end of the school day, so he is 1:1 at lunch and break.

I don't want to make it a big deal, but it's expensive! Jumpers are £15 each! but I don't want to come across as nagging or do anything to sour the really brilliant relationship I have with the school by coming across like I'm bitching about jumpers and coats, when they really go all out for him and his brother.

but, like I say, I just can't afford to keep replacing stuff.

I wouldn't expect them to follow him round carrying all his stuff (although he would LOVE that grin ) but yes, "X, have you got your..." would be great. The aim is of course to get to the point where he is independent. Well, as independent as possible. He will never achieve independence, sadly. But that's a process and he's not there yet or anywhere close.

Kafri Tue 20-Nov-12 16:23:00

If you have to keep paying for these items, then I would defo be saying something. Your soe is funded for his 1:1 for a reason - to support him in his needs. One of his needs is taking care of his possessions.

I look at my job as a real way to make a difference to the lives of the kids I support. Not only at school but as they move in to adult services. The more we can achieve in school by way of independence, the better off they will be as they move into adult life.

Looking after his things is just as valid a part of independence as learning to make simple meals, or getting dressed or personal hygiene etc (obviously those are the needs of my boys at school, not necessarily yours)

CailinDana Tue 20-Nov-12 16:23:26

I think 3b's suggestion to make it part of his IEP is a really good one. Keeping track of stuff is an important life skill and it could be taught across the day using a visual schedule. So in the morning you and his LSA velcro a picture of each item he needs to keep track of to his schedule and at certain times of the day - after break, after lunch, etc they check the schedule together to see if anything's missing, with the aim that eventually he's doing this independently and without the need for a schedule.

I think you are perfectly right to bring this up with the school. It is crazy for you to have to replace jumpers regularly.

FannyFifer Tue 20-Nov-12 16:25:25

If he is 1-1 then surely the person is responsible for his belongings as well as him.


AmberLeaf Tue 20-Nov-12 16:32:20

Yeah it definitely needs addressing, I can see that would get expensive!

3b1g Tue 20-Nov-12 20:02:27

DS1 (NT but poor organisational skills) used to have a hand shape with the five things he needed to remember written on the fingers. Eventually he didn't need the visual aid as he could just look at his hand and it would remind him of the five things.

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