about the word "frape"??

[BunnyLeBOOwski]

Logged onto FB this morning and was subjected to no less than 3 posts including this odious word.

In a fit of pique I posted a status along the lines of "For the love of God people, please stop using the word "frape". It makes you look insensitive and uneducated".

I know, I know, FB is the work of the devil and I shouldn't care but these are otherwise vaguely intelligent people and it is a hateful word is it not??

Or is it a harmless word and I'm overreacting?

Disclaimer: I'm at best pre-menstrual, at worst preggo so I may just be a tad snippier than usual .

[SantyClaws]

sorry if i'm being thick but what does it mean?

[BunnyLeBOOwski]

Facebook Rape i.e. when someone else gains access to a friend's FB and posts "I love bumsex I do".

Eurgh.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

I think yabu, well a bit.

The dictionary definition of rape :


n.

1. The crime of forcing another person to submit to sex acts, especially sexual intercourse.
   
2. The act of seizing and carrying off by force; abduction.
   
3. Abusive or improper treatment; violation: a rape of justice.
   

So "frape" would be a corruption of number 3 not a dismissal of number 1.

[SantyClaws]

pfft that's cringetastic

i used to work somewhere where you couldn't nip to the loo without locking your computer or you'd come back to a sent box asking half the office out or telling them you love them.

used to drive me potty

so on the whole YANBU

[Anonymumous]

Gosh, I thought you meant rape by a friend / date rape. Shows what I know!

[Kalisi]

YABU.
Although I am sure there will be a few people that will argue very passionately that you are not.

[AnyFucker]

I would judge

[Alisvolatpropiis]

Why would you judge AF?

The dictionary definition of the word is upthread. They're not doing anything wrong in using the word.

[Kalisi]

Hmmm, last post did not come across as I'd intended. I mean that I have heard quite a few people express their distaste at the word 'frape' so you are not alone. I do not personally believe there is a problem with it but those that do seem to feel more strongly than those that don't IYSWIM

[AnyFucker]

I would judge because it is crass and ignorant.

Do you really think these people have checked the "correct" dictionary definition, or do you think they are using the word ill advisedly because of ignorance?

I am going with the latter

[Alisvolatpropiis]

Rape has never been used exclusively for forced sex.

It doesn't really matter whether they know or not does it,as there is one dictionary definition and the usage falls into one of them.

Why presume people don't know and are ignorant anyway?

[ratbagcatbag]

Don't like it either, and pull people up on it.

[HoratiaWinwood]

Dictionary doesn't tell you what people in general think a word means, otherwise you would happily describe your child's new yellow wellies as "gay".

We have enough problems of a social misunderstanding of what rape is, without further muddying the waters by using the word casually and figuratively. We can say that Girls Aloud "murdered" a tune because they are criminally talentless and everyone knows what murder is.

[MrsHelsBels74]

I hate it, but then I usually have my judgey pants hoiked up to my chin anyway.

[kinkyfuckery]

I know the word 'rape' has alternative meaning other than non-consensual sex, but I too don't like it being bandied around in respect to Facebook posts.

[FromEsme]

Hate the word. It doesn't really matter what the dictionary definition is, it's perfectly obvious which meaning they are referring to.

I also think people who engage in this tedious practice are arseholes of the highest order who need to get a grip.

[SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus]

This thread has been done umpteen times before.

YANBU for thinking it's a horrible word but it's actually used in the correct context so YABU a bit.

[Cozy9]

You can't fix the meaning of a word, or tell people how to use it. Trying to do so just makes people use it in the way you don't like even more.

[Alisvolatpropiis]

But language evolves Horatia. As proven by your example of gay and saying Girls Aloud "murdered" a song.

Frape has passed into common parlance whether one finds it offensive or not,I don't think it's going to be going to disappear any time soon.

[SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus]

Kinky I don't like the word but why? There is another meaning for the word but people shouldn't use it because it's also used to describe something horrible?

I have heard plenty of people on here say things along the lines of "I could murder the kids" or "I could murder a pizza" etc. There really isn't any difference except one is used in the correct context and is deemed as disrespectful and the other isn't but is acceptable.

It's quite confusing actually.

[SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus]

X posts.

[HoratiaWinwood]

Language has always been used figuratively. I'm a minor language development expert, BTW, having a degree in Linguistics.

Putting childish comments on someone else's FB isn't anything like forcing a sex act on them, even figuratively. Hijacked is a more appropriate phrase as it is closer in meaning.

But it is part of the social misunderstanding and denial and belittling of rape, and the persistence of rape myths, that lets people use the word so casually and inaccurately.

"Fraping" is often funny and almost always the victim's fault. Still defend use of the word?

[BunnyLeBOOwski]

Well said Horatia.

And as AF says, I highly doubt that these people are researching the definition before using.

It's just another little word that perpetuates the rape culture we live in. And I just can't see that as harmless.

DP agrees and suggest 'facejack' as an alternative.

[HoratiaWinwood]

Ps "minor expert" is obviously a joke, but I am more aware than the average reader of language development...