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To lick wine off my kitchen floor

(98 Posts)
InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Sat 17-Nov-12 20:51:11

I have gone to the fridge to get my bottle of wine as I'm home alone and too poor to go out..

I then dropped the wine <sob> and it has smashed all over the floor <sobs harder>

AIBU to lick the wine up in between sobs?

PickledFanjoCat Sat 17-Nov-12 21:23:48

Fanj! That's awful. sad

Drink all the sourz then come up with a plan!

VerySmallSqueak Sat 17-Nov-12 21:25:04

Pop socks shock

Can you still get them in American tan ?

HokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Sat 17-Nov-12 21:25:07

Hazel is a genius!

<grabs Hazel's head in both hands and plants a smacker on her forehead>

Yes tights, tights are what you need!

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Sat 17-Nov-12 21:25:22

<whispers> what's a pop sock?

Themobstersknife Sat 17-Nov-12 21:25:55

Have you got a bagless? Hoover up and sieve. Maybes empty the hoover first...

PickledFanjoCat Sat 17-Nov-12 21:26:13

It's a half tight half sock travesty fanj.

HokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Sat 17-Nov-12 21:26:43

Those tights to your knee things.

Yamyoid Sat 17-Nov-12 21:29:00

Just want to delurk to send my condolences. That is a bad thing.

FuckityDuck Sat 17-Nov-12 21:31:06

Do you have a torch if so, get down point it to look for them nasty bits of glass, and lick.

But also as said before, maybe cute paramedic. Saturday night A&E with all the pissheads. hmm

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Sat 17-Nov-12 21:31:34

Ah I know what they are now. I don't own any.

Yamyoid Sat 17-Nov-12 21:31:41

I mean bad thing that the bottle smashed. I'd go for the straw and pop sock idea. I know some one that smashed a 20 year old bottle of champagne when opening it at a wedding. It had been saved for a special occasion.

Yamyoid Sat 17-Nov-12 21:32:17

Use tights instead.

honeytea Sat 17-Nov-12 21:32:34

Some of the pissheads in A+E might have some spare wine going!

HokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Sat 17-Nov-12 21:32:36

You must have tights, do you have a dd, does she have tights?!!

Myliferocks Sat 17-Nov-12 21:34:53

And this is exactly why I buy wine in boxes!
I have discovered that 1 box of wine holds 9 ( yes 9! ) large glasses of wine for £5.29!

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Sat 17-Nov-12 21:35:38

Ode To Wine

You were the light at the end of the tunnel
You were the the only thing I needed
I thought you were there for me but no
The floor needed you a lot more
Now I stand here looking at your remains
All I want is to scoop you up in my cupped hands
But I'm afraid your glass outsides will cut me
Farewell wine.

VerySmallSqueak Sat 17-Nov-12 21:36:53

Has anyone got their bottles out ready for recycling on Monday?

Could you do a 'neighbourhood tour' drinking the dregs out?

<desperate times,desperate measures>

FuckityDuck Sat 17-Nov-12 21:37:26

Yuck you would get the pissheads spit back vomit

Dishcloth that would do do you have one of them, linen, hanky friggin we are all freaks lmao grin

Myliferocks Sat 17-Nov-12 21:38:21

A sponge might work.

VerySmallSqueak Sat 17-Nov-12 21:38:33

<dries eyes>

That was beautiful Fanjo.

Truly beautiful.

FuckityDuck Sat 17-Nov-12 21:38:34

And where the hell is a box of wine for £5.29 omg. I want a shop like that grin

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Sat 17-Nov-12 21:39:03

I'm sat thinking what I always do in these bad times.

What would OliviaMNHQ do


Themobstersknife Sat 17-Nov-12 21:39:17

Silently sobbing and nodding at ode to wine...

Themobstersknife Sat 17-Nov-12 21:40:00

Yes we need Olivia. She will know.

FuckityDuck Sat 17-Nov-12 21:41:41

I still say straw, you cant suck glass though a straw would be banging on neighbours doors now, with an obscure story as to why I wanted a straw

ohhhh school project smile

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