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To inform the baggy combat wearing, makeup free and greasy ponytail club

(187 Posts)
LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 17:20:49

. . .who seem to think they are superior parents because of these attributions that they are in no way any better at parenting then i am with my make up on curled hair, slightly too tight jeans and a smile.

And announce that they probably do spend more time thinking about the way they look then putting ''that energy into playing with my children'' than they seem to think.

This is not a thread moaning about the people who dare to wear comfortable clothes and leave the house (i do too occasionally), or who are confident enough to go out without make up on because it matters not too them, but instead about those who declare it is ''because they are to busy to care and would rather play with the kids'' Passive aggressively or maybe those who roll there eyes and nudge there partner in there ribs with gusto if they see someone with a child in tow who fancied wearing high heels to Nandos.

anyone know what this is about?, doesn't the whole ''i'm so relaxed that i don't need to care what people think of me'' end up lost in the convincing everyone that they are doing there kids a favour by not wearing perfume and makeup.

Or is DS going to grow up sideways because of me for spending an extra ten minutes in the bedroom before DP goes to work? grin

Floggingmolly Sat 17-Nov-12 18:06:39

If people constantly nudge each other and whisper behind their hands as you walk past hmm, it's unlikely they're thinking you don't spend enough time with your children.
Is your makeup clown like? Is your skirt in your knickers? Most people are too busy with their own lives to actually notice or care what complete strangers are doing.

Whatnowffs Sat 17-Nov-12 18:07:10

Then do please continue to wear them. Im just jealous cos i have fat calves.

Pagwatch Sat 17-Nov-12 18:08:19

I have read the 'people who get dressed up each day are self obsessed and I would rather spend my time concentrating on the children' thing on here.
Same as the 'I am a sahm because I don't wnt to miss a moment with my child' thing..

Only on here though. In real life people don't care.
I have had a slightly snarky 'oh, are you going somewhere?'. I usually reply 'I am always going somewhere'

BOFingSanta Sat 17-Nov-12 18:08:51

You wear stripper shoes on the school run? I think that's why you're getting the funny looks, love. I doubt it's the curly hair.

noddyholder Sat 17-Nov-12 18:08:54


LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:10:54

No flogging it tends to be much more passive aggressive than that, And no my makeup is not terribly clown like fingers crossed but it is a matter of fact that it does happen, this type of judging does.

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Nov-12 18:11:33

I do the school run in that I drop DS1 at the school bus stop. What should I be wearing? I don't get out of the car.

Tee2072 Sat 17-Nov-12 18:12:40

I think I love my school gate. The parents barely talk.

LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:13:19

yes BOF , along with my leather skirt and blue eyeshadow, maybe this thread is a huge red herring.

I am doubting myself now, i thought everyone would get it.

LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:15:07

Forgot to mention DS is 23 months so no school gate yet, this is mainly a playgroup thing.

I am not even the type of person who thinks playgroups are bitchy this is the only thing i tend to notice.

Waspie Sat 17-Nov-12 18:17:42

Everyone is judged by their appearance to a certain extent in any situation aren't they? If I wore a cocktail dress and a pair of Jimmy Choos to pick up my son from school I'd get some looks in the same way that I would if I wore jeans, converse and a "I've got great tits" t-shirt* to the office.

* I do NOT own this t-shirt!

BOFingSanta Sat 17-Nov-12 18:18:04

Shecksayyyyyy grin

NoraGainesborough Sat 17-Nov-12 18:19:52

I bet you do though waspie. I think it would be appropriate for casual fridays. grin

BOFingSanta Sat 17-Nov-12 18:20:04

Not so much...

freddiefrog Sat 17-Nov-12 18:20:09

I've had a few of these comments irl

I'm no supermodel but I like clothes and fashion and make up. I enjoy messin around with outfits and hair, etc

I've had 'I'd rather spend more time with my children' 'every spare penny I have goes on my children, not pretty clothes for myself' 'you have too much time on your hands' and many variations.

I don't give a shiny shite what other people wear, I usually don't take a whole lot of notice.

I wear what I like and ignore the stupid comments, I don't need to justify my clothing choices or how I spend my time and money to anyone, as they don't need to justify their choices to me

Nancy66 Sat 17-Nov-12 18:20:24

Those are Courtney Stodden's feet aren't they? I'm a bit obsessed with her.

LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:20:49

I am a classy lady BOF but those feet are not ,mine i am 30 shades lighter and sport corned beef legs on a good day.

NoraGainesborough Sat 17-Nov-12 18:22:38

WTF nancy you recognize someones feet?

Does she know she has a stalker? grin

Slightly impressed by your powers of recognition.

LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:23:15

Love that you could recognize someone by their feet nancy , that's talent there.

BOFingSanta Sat 17-Nov-12 18:27:38

Yes, that's impressive grin

LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:29:58

in my head nancy is now ''the one who knows feet''

Lavenderhoney Sat 17-Nov-12 18:29:58

my first thought was that sounds like me at drop offsmile

I scrub up later for pick up though.

Tbh, I have seen mums at soft play with heels and short minis who won't interact and play with their dc. And I do think a different wardrobe choice would have been more suitable, but maybe they came from work..

pointythings Sat 17-Nov-12 18:30:49

I am too lazy to put on make-up and bother with my hair, which is short and grey, but clean. I am also too lazy to judge people though, so that evens it out...

LolaDontCryOverSlitThroats Sat 17-Nov-12 18:31:26

If it is affecting how they can play then the connection between the two is there, it is the connecting of two no reason that bothers me.

Waspie Sat 17-Nov-12 18:34:47

NoraGainesborough grin - actually someone did wear a slogan t-shirt far worse on dress down Friday's a few years back. The result was an amendment to the "appropriate office attire" commandment. Oh, and the wearer got transferred to the Sydney office (lucky git!)

Lola, wear what you feel comfortable in - you're being the best parent you can be and if people don't like what you wear to do that in then that's their problem, not yours.

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