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For asking bf to get tested for HIV?

(96 Posts)
ekojem Sat 17-Nov-12 14:38:49

Split up with my bf 5 years ago and we got back together two months ago (through fb).

Since we split up he has gone travelling every winter to Thailand and Cambodia. I've seen photos on his fb with plenty of local girls there draped over him, one even feeding him grapes! I've read you can pay these women to stay with you for weeks or even marry you if you give them money.

Also, he told me when he goes there (he usually stays 2 or 3 months) he smokes crystal meth. I read up about it as I was worried about him smoking that stuff and it said it makes you very horny that you will shag anything as you are out of your mind on drugs.

AIBU to ask him to have an HIV test before we sleep together again? We haven't had sex yet because he won't wear a condom. He keeps refusing to go for STI checks. I can't help thinking he is hiding something? He has also refused to tell me about the girls in the photos.

He is going back there in December for two months (he booked it ages ago), should I trust him to stay faithful?

Thanks Jem

BIWI Sun 18-Nov-12 15:58:32

Ah. ekojem = mejoke

IvanaHumpalotCountDracula Sun 18-Nov-12 15:55:31

Thanks Fut g r i m

oohlaalaa Sun 18-Nov-12 15:50:41

Ekojem - write off the money you have lent him. If he's not prepared to take an std test for you, he's not worth it.

FutTheShuckUp Sun 18-Nov-12 15:45:12

Tis the male equivalent of blue waffle disease so I'm told wink

RandallPinkFloyd Sun 18-Nov-12 15:42:57

Holy Jesus, special fried rice willy disease shock

I do not want to know what you were googling!

FutTheShuckUp Sun 18-Nov-12 14:03:18

Ermm- I work a lot of night shifts- light entertainment/shock value is sometimes needed grin

Softlysoftly Sun 18-Nov-12 13:59:10

*vommed not commend!

Softlysoftly Sun 18-Nov-12 13:58:38

Fut I just commend why do you know that link my eyes my eyes!

RandallPinkFloyd Sun 18-Nov-12 13:57:41

Well I knew it was a wind up but how did I miss that!

<Facepalm> grin

Glitterknickaz Sun 18-Nov-12 13:52:39

Of course it's a wind up.
Read the OP name backwards.

FutTheShuckUp Sun 18-Nov-12 13:42:32

Does his willy look like this


rogersmellyonthetelly Sun 18-Nov-12 13:05:12

If you are really honestly set on a relationship with this man, then no Yanbu to ask him to get a full screening for all stds including HIV. Personally, I wouldn't want to have a relationship with anyone who thought it was ok to go on holiday to somewhere and pay for sex, but it takes all sorts.

Rudolphstolemycarrots Sun 18-Nov-12 12:12:52

I think you need to get some counselling and move on.

Rudolphstolemycarrots Sun 18-Nov-12 12:07:50

you deserve better.

if he loved you, he would take the tests openly in order to keep you safe.

CoolaSchmoola Sun 18-Nov-12 11:53:21

This is what Crystal Meth will do for him...

Will you still love him when he looks like a rotting corpse?

Mrsjay Sun 18-Nov-12 11:07:00

I hope this is a wind up, nobody could be that stupid naive to think he would be great boyfriend material

I dont think it is people put up with a lot from people, women have babies with drug adicts criminals etc etc like fishwife said her sister had a baby with a loser it happens ,

Fishwife1980 Sun 18-Nov-12 11:02:54

Why would it be a wind loads of people date loosers my sister had a baby with a guy

Who had no job and already had 4 children one of which his brother had tried to sexually abuse and is in jail for but he still speaks to the brother and has frozen out the childs mother for calling the police shock

a real cath right but she wouldnt be told her self worth is really low and this is all she thinks she is worth

cees Sat 17-Nov-12 20:45:45

Yeah he sounds a keeper ......................hmm

I hope this is a wind up, nobody could be that stupid naive to think he would be great boyfriend material.

ChestyNutsRoastingAnOpenFire Sat 17-Nov-12 20:41:39


Fishwife1980 Sat 17-Nov-12 20:39:21

Sorry but i think this says more aout were the op is at in terms of self asteam

Someone who is not low would not evean entertain this looser

Anonymumous Sat 17-Nov-12 20:32:52

Enjoy the revenge of being the one to chuck him this time around. Then find someone better who deserves you. The End.

catgirl1976 Sat 17-Nov-12 20:26:04

Crystal Meth? Trips to Thailand?

Run. Run fast. Run far.

spotsdots Sat 17-Nov-12 20:24:55

OP the truth hurts but please like others have said run for your life.
(a) You broke up before, what gurantee do you have that it won't happen again?

(b) He's been sleeping with other women, prostitutes or not he might have picked some bugs including HIV.

(c) A man who says NO to using condom is wreckless with his life, therefore couldn't give a toss about your life either.

BloominMarvellous Sat 17-Nov-12 17:21:46

Oh FFS I hope this is a wind up!!!

If not then please run, you know it's bad or else you wouldn't have posted!

He sounds like a really dream!! hmm

crazyhatlady Sat 17-Nov-12 17:14:42

Is this a wind-up by any chance? I find it hard to believe anyone with half a brain would have to ask such a question. If not then yabu to consider sleeping with this man full stop.

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