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to leave dds together as i need to do housework?

(16 Posts)
familyfun Thu 15-Nov-12 14:22:41

dd1 is 5, dd2 is 2. they went through a fighting phase, snatching and hitting each other, but this is now passed and they love to play together but the only thing they play when together is running/chasing/climbing/jumping. no toys/games/craft can distract them, they just play rough, laughing their heads off, then one ends up hurt.

tried to speak to dp about it, saying worst times are hr before school when im trying to get all 3 of us ready and hr after school when im trying to get dinner done. dont know how to deal with them, everytime i leave the room to wash up/prepare dinner/get dressed they start the games and im in and out asking then shouting at them to stop.

dps answer- dont leave them alone. they cant be left as they play rough so split them up and leave the housework.

i dont think this is the answer, i have to get ready in morning, i have to do dinner, i like to wash up but suppose i dont have to, i dont want to drag a 2 yr old round with me and she wouldnt just stand my me anyway.

aibu? dp says as i dont have a better solution, i must just not leave them together

WileyRoadRunner Thu 15-Nov-12 14:27:02

blush earplugs and a laissez faire attitude to injury?

witchitagrub Thu 15-Nov-12 14:29:09

Explain that they are allowed to play together but if they're too rough you'll split them up, then follow through?

My DDs are 4 and 2 and can be a bit like this but they no that sanctions for hurting each other are tough so they generally don't.

LaCiccolina Thu 15-Nov-12 14:31:16

Ill get shot for this but have u tried the tv? DVD? The morning one u may have to grin and bear but evening could be alleviated I'm sure. Can they have milk & biscuits to share?

Dump sheets and towels in room and make a den?

Sounds unfortunately normal a problem. Dunno if that comforting!

D0oinMeCleanin Thu 15-Nov-12 14:31:56

iPod and a mantra of "Unless there is blood I don't want to know"

redskyatnight Thu 15-Nov-12 14:32:51

How frequently do you have to go in? If they see that mum is not going to go in and intervene every 2 minutes, they might give up and just get on with it.

Otherwise I suggest giving them a warning and then putting them in separate rooms.

For dinner, one (or both) of them can help?

elfycat Thu 15-Nov-12 14:36:12

I have similar aged DDs (4 & 2) and they're the same. I just get on with what I can while listening to the rough and tumble. I go look for loud bangs, screams (not the frustrated ones) or when they go quiet. I basically remind them that they're lovely and such good sisters and hope some of my optimism will rub off on them then run away for a few minutes

One time it went quiet and I found they'd decided to take all of their clothes out and spread them over the bedroom. So I'd managed 10 minutes of cleaning, and in the same time they created a job that took me 20 minutes to sort. I calculated that as a -10 minuted of housework.

WileyRoadRunner Thu 15-Nov-12 14:39:00

D0oinMeCleanin is spot on!

familyfun Thu 15-Nov-12 14:39:14

when they were fighting/argueing i stopped going in so much and left them to sort it out a bit more and it worked mostly although there is a 3 yr gap so had to make sure dd2 wasnt being overpowered too much.
now they are playing but running turns to jumping on/off sofa and dd2 invariably ends up hurt trying to copy dd1 and they are shrieking/shouting constantly which must drive the neighbours mad (it drives me mad).
dp says thats what siblings do.
i only have step siblings so dont know.
i have tried tv, any music coming on means they get up to dance, which turned to mad spinning till dd1 smashed her mouth off tv unit sad

familyfun Thu 15-Nov-12 14:39:58

there is very often injury and too much noise in a semi detached house.

familyfun Thu 15-Nov-12 14:40:57

in the summer we went to the park a lot after school, got home after a long walk to dinner and they were work out, they just have too much energy and are v excited to be together.

naturalbaby Thu 15-Nov-12 14:41:26

I've been doing this from day 1! I has a very clingy ds1 and couldn't get anything done so when ds2 arrived they both sat together while I did the housework and play really well together.

However..I now have a 4 1/2yr old, 3 yr old, nearly 2 yr old and they do pretty much need very close supervision because my 4yr old is shoving the other 2 a bit too hard. I do leave them as much as possible but ds2 is accident prone enough without ds1 shoving him across the room. Dinner time is the worst, I'm off to buy pizza and garlic bread later to make life a bit easier tonight.

CailinDana Thu 15-Nov-12 14:50:53

Take a "lalala not listening" attitude and have petrol in the car ready to go to A and E in the unlikely event of it being necessary. It's lovely that they play so well together - my sister and I used to do the same before we started hating each other! So they'll get a bit hurt, they'll soon learn after a few bumps and scrapes <says lady who smashed her face open in various places numerous times and still didn't learn>

familyfun Thu 15-Nov-12 14:56:47

yes part of me is just happy that they are now playing/laughing/hugging rather than hitting/snatching and argueing constantly.
dd2 gets so excited going to fetch dd1 from school, then they both change from quiet jigsaw and drawing loving dcs to wild animals grin

familyfun Thu 15-Nov-12 14:57:28

this morning i said to dd2 "love you dd2" and she replied with "love you mommy, love sister best" grin

Pandemoniaa Thu 15-Nov-12 15:00:52

ds1 & 2 were similar but actually, the rough play invariably looked and sounded far worse than it was. If I constantly intervened, things had a habit of turning genuinely rough. I'm not saying it is reasonable to allow anyone to get hurt but equally, you should be able to let them play together while you get dressed or attempt the washing up. Your dp's attitude sounds distinctly unhelpful too. Perhaps he could look after them if he is so determined that they can't be left alone together?

What I didn't let mine do was run around indoors like complete loons and jump on and off furniture though. That's not play, it's a recipe for someone getting hurt. Obviously children need to run off energy but doing so in a confined environment carries a certain risk.

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