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To not want to potty train my toddler yet?

(80 Posts)
scentednappyhag Mon 12-Nov-12 12:39:59

She was two yesterday. People have been telling me I should start potty training for the last six months.
AIBU to be getting tired of calmly explaining that I don't think she's ready right now, and WIBU to fling poo at the next person to give 'helpful' critique of my parenting failure on this subject?

Wheresmycaffeinedrip Mon 12-Nov-12 12:41:30

Yanbu. I get this from
My parents. Dd isn't even two yet and doesn't say that much either so wouldn't even be able to say wee please mummy.

Haylebop12 Mon 12-Nov-12 12:41:59

Ignore them. My MIL insisted her pfb was toilet trained at 12 months!

My dd is bright and verbally advanced but I did her at 2.2. She was dry instantly at night and within 2 days in the day.

If they think she's ready they can do it for you!

squeakytoy Mon 12-Nov-12 12:42:05

If you havent tried, how do you know she isnt ready though??

MrsHelsBels74 Mon 12-Nov-12 12:42:08

It's up to you when you potty train. DS1 is 2.9 & still not potty trained. We've tried but he's just not ready so I don't see the point in stressing us both out when he'll do it when he's ready.

pictish Mon 12-Nov-12 12:42:14

Yanbu. None of mine were potty trained until just before three - in time for starting nursery.
They were old enough at that point to understand what was expected of them, and why.

Some kids are ready to potty train at 2...but not a lot, and I honestly believe that many parents struggle to potty train their littlies because they try to force it to soon.

Haylebop12 Mon 12-Nov-12 12:42:49

You'll know when she's ready. As her mum you know her better than anyone. FACT.

mrskeithrichards Mon 12-Nov-12 12:43:58

I've never understood this ready thing, I just bashed on and got it done.

How do they know their ready?

KellyElly Mon 12-Nov-12 12:44:18

Ridiculous. So many children are potty trained at nearer three. I would say around 2.5 is the age most of my friends kids were trained. My DD was 2.9. I tried before that three times as it just stressed us both out. Just do it when it's right for you and DD and don't worry about what other people say.

doublemocha Mon 12-Nov-12 12:44:29

yanbu - both of my dc's were 2.75 (boy and girl). They both were dry both day and night immediately - honest! I probably got a lot of stuff wrong when they were little but I think I did potty training ok. I just didn't stress about it at all until I felt they were ready.

mrskeithrichards Mon 12-Nov-12 12:50:23


scentednappyhag Mon 12-Nov-12 12:52:21

I don't think she's ready as she doesn't seem aware that she is weeing/pooing yet, and it seems silly to me to start until she's able to tell me that she needs to go. But that's my point, I don't want to keep justifying why I haven't started yet, it's only DD and I who need to be affected by it.

FayeKinitt Mon 12-Nov-12 12:53:29

Don't listen! I had it the other way round, my lovely and well meaning SIL told me that attempting to potty train before 3 was pointless. Because she had slightly older children I listened to her.

Then when DD2 was born (when DD1 was 2.3) we thought a good way to make sure she had extra attention was to potty train her (lots of praise/rewards, sitting with her in the bathroom) and she managed no bother! 9 months down the line I could count on my left hand how many accidents she's had.

The annoying thing is nothing in her 'development' had changed when we did it. I firmly believe if we'd tried when she turned two she would have been fine then. So i wasted three months of nappies.

If your DC hasn't managed to potty train (I'm assuming you've had a go if you know she wasn't ready?) then no big deal, just tell them to STFU!

ioness Mon 12-Nov-12 12:54:06

yanbu - we tried everything with our dd. She wasn't ready. At 3.5 when I'd lost all hope, she suddenly decided she would now use the toilet/potty and never used a nappy again. Had two accidents in the first week, nothing since.

There really isn't any point in trying if they're just not ready.

EdgarAllanPond Mon 12-Nov-12 12:54:57

train whenever you like - parents prerogative.

once trained they learn to tell you pretty soon -by one way or another.

FayeKinitt Mon 12-Nov-12 12:55:39

Sorry x-posts

Meglet Mon 12-Nov-12 12:57:54


I tried mine at 2.6, was a total disaster. Tried again a couple of months later, again it didn't work.

In the end I waited until DS was 3.3 and DD was 3.4 and did it during the Xmas hols as I had time off work and the energy to deal with it. All ok within a couple of days and only a couple of accidents at nursery when they went back in the January.

Mrsjay Mon 12-Nov-12 12:59:59

18 yrs ago my mum said my dd would go to school in nappies she didnt I didn't start training her till she was after 2 but before 2 and a half she was dry by the time she started playgroup 2.9 (they had to be back then ) i did the same with dd , you don't have to do anything yet ,

BreconBeBuggered Mon 12-Nov-12 13:00:21

YANBU. I was thought to be pretty lazy because beyond letting my DC know the toilet and potty were there for them when they were ready, I let them take the lead. No pressure, no hassle, no wet floors or shitty pants. They were dry in plenty of time for nursery, and they won't have to put anything on their CVs about not being toilet-trained before the age of two.

Idocrazythings Mon 12-Nov-12 13:03:28

YABU to fling poo- I think put it in a pellet gun and fire it at them! My middle child was ready at two, my eldest just before 3 and youngest 2 1/2. Have never been able to get any of them to sit on a potty until they were ready too though- they just wouldn't. Once they were ready were pretty much dry straight away. (Apart from night times, that has proved difficult…)

sleepsforwimps2010 Mon 12-Nov-12 13:03:41

op my friend started potty training her son when he was 18months, he was 2.3 before he was dry!
she tells everyone he was trained st 18 months..... i was there round the daily puddles so know differently!!
our potty training started today! ds is 2.6.
he was ready about 8weeks ago but dd was only 4weeks old and i decided to wait till I was ready!
but i know what you mean about the pressure! mil is convinced that not only was dh potty trained before he was 2 he was also reading apparently!!
so we're potty training in secret... don't think we need the pressure.
you'll know when the time is right.

girlsyearapart Mon 12-Nov-12 13:04:47

I get this too from my mum re dd3.

So f ing fed up that a few weekends ago when she arrived to look after her I said she's wearing knickers today and here's the potty..

Return from mums wearing a nappy and my mum saying 'oh she's not ready yet is she?!' hmm

My mum didn't really like having her wee on the floor funnily enough.

Which I'm not keen on especially since ds who crawls at about 200 mph will go straight through it..

MsVestibule Mon 12-Nov-12 13:05:06

DD was 2.4; she had horrendous nappy rash so I thought it would be a good idea for her to have a lot of 'nappy free' time and it just went from there. Tried DS at 2.6, no chance. Tried 3 months later and he took to it straight away.

For both of them, there was no sign at all that they were 'ready'. I just went for it and hoped for the best. Who's telling you to start now?

steppemum Mon 12-Nov-12 13:26:42

apparently we were all out of nappies at 2. That put huge pressure on me until my mum let slip one day that we were out of nappies because she couldn't bear to keep washing them, so she sat up on potties, got rid of nappies and put up with the accidents til we got it.

so, not actually potty trained at all then...!

Do it when you are ready. Winter is rubbish time to train anyway
ds was very quick, sort of did it himself at 2.2, in the week dd1 was born hmm
dd1 started at 2 and took a year, wish I had waited, would have been less stressful
dd2 did herself at 18 months (advantage of older siblings)

EdgarAllanPond Mon 12-Nov-12 13:38:53

the average PT age globally is 12 months - that doesn't mean you have to do it then though.

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