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Anybody up?? My 3 year old JUST WON'T SLEEP!

(26 Posts)
BackToB4Beatrice Thu 08-Nov-12 00:32:23

She has never been great. Since getting a Bed it has spiralled out of control. She is now awake after being asleep for a few hours, screaming, trashing her room, and in a red hot rage. She wants to be up and playing. She has Gro clock, star chart, treats if she sleeps all night etc. The only thing I could do now is get her up, put the TV on and she will fall asleep in a couple of hours! But I can't keep doing that or she will never poor neighbours!

I want to cry, please help, hand hold etc

BackToB4Beatrice Thu 08-Nov-12 00:43:52


blackeyedsusan Thu 08-Nov-12 00:44:37

have you tried holding her very fimly in a hug til she calms down?
works fo ds, sometimes.

good luck!

WelshMaenad Thu 08-Nov-12 00:46:06

Will she settle if you lie down in/next to her bed? Story? Warm milk? Bath, even??

EmpressOfTheSevenOceans Thu 08-Nov-12 00:47:11

No advice sorry, but brew and sympathy.

BackToB4Beatrice Thu 08-Nov-12 00:50:51

Tried all those other than the bath. She is still so mad, and every time I think she is beginning to settle, she kicks off again. The only thing to do would be to bring her down, but really don't want too, although do really feel for the neighbours, as we live in a semi detached house, so I'm sure they must be able to hear her.

Eugh, feel terrible. For her, for neighbours, for me sad

ChunkysMum Thu 08-Nov-12 00:52:16

Oh dear. I have no words of wisdom to offer I'm afraid, but wanted to offer unmumsnetty hugs to a fellow sleep deprived parent
I really hope she calms down and goes to sleep for you soon.
Don't worry about your neighbours. Most people understand when it comes to young children.

ChunkysMum Thu 08-Nov-12 00:54:11

Had an idea: would she lie in bed listening to a story tape until she falls asleep?

BackToB4Beatrice Thu 08-Nov-12 00:57:56

ChunkeysMum- I had thought this, I may go and get one tomorrow, if that doesn't work, I'm all out of ideas! DH is out for the count. God knows how!

Thanks for the support ladies (or gents wink )

WelshMaenad Thu 08-Nov-12 01:01:55

Try a bath! If DS is raging crazy chucking him in water always mellows him out.

eatingrottenapples Thu 08-Nov-12 01:03:22

No real advice i'm afraid but I am to hand hold and to reassure that although it's,horrible at the moment they do grow out if it

HorridHeffalumpsWickedWoozles Thu 08-Nov-12 01:04:25

I second the story tape idea, I remember my own parents bribing me with the same thing and it worked. My favourites were (and still are, have even bought them for DD1 now) Alan Bennett reading Winnie The Pooh, Johnny Morris' Animal Tales, and various Roald Dahl stories. It was something to look forward to and invariably we never stayed awake until the end.

Really hope whatever you do you can all get some sleep soon smile

ripsishere Thu 08-Nov-12 01:48:50

brew for you wine for her. It may knock her out.

Goldenjubilee10 Thu 08-Nov-12 02:17:21

I'm up, just can't sleep. Does she just not need very much sleep? Ds3 appears to need less than I do and he rarely slept through the night at 3. He's 6 now so can be reasoned with. Sometimes I have to send him downstairs to watch tv at 5am so I can catch another hour! I do hope things get easier for you soon.

ThatVikRinA22 Thu 08-Nov-12 02:24:52

is she at nursery or anything that would tire her out during the day?
is it every night that she does this?

you have my sympathies - my eldest has AS and never slept - though he was placid and i could leave him playing and get more sleep!

will she settle herself if you do the story tape idea and let her play a bit in her room/bed?

i wouldnt lay with her, but i would let her into my bed....(used to do this with mine at same age)

does she just not need much sleep?

Mayisout Thu 08-Nov-12 02:39:53

Have no idea really but I am an insomniac and think that eating very sweet stuff or having a couple of drinks (this part doesn't apply to your DD) makes me wake during the night and feel v wide awake. So perhaps looking at her evening meal and making it blander but filling might help.

Softlysoftly Thu 08-Nov-12 03:08:55

Oh dear, no advice but a big dollop of sympathy and solidarity. Currently DD2 is up (5m she hates her cot maximum I get is 4hrs a night yawn!), DD1 is up, she's 3 and has flu and DH is up as I yelled at him for snoring blush.

Have you tried just sleeping her in your bed?

BratinghamPalace Thu 08-Nov-12 03:16:17

My dd2 was this. Really awful and reduced me to tears many times. A wise friend explained to me that the rage they feel frightens them also. It takes over. I used to bring mine downstairs, we would make a hot milky drink together, take it back up and the two of us would drink it in bed and read a book.
Worked most times. Good luck op, mine has grown out of now but it was a very bleak time for me. Big hug to you.
Ps, she is a delight now at 4!

BeaWheesht Thu 08-Nov-12 03:43:47

Oh ds was like this - now he sleeps 7-7.

I haven't been to bed yet because dd has croup - I am exhausted!!

BeaWheesht Thu 08-Nov-12 03:44:19

Sorry that sounde very me me me - meant to Say so you have my sympathy!

SavoyCabbage Thu 08-Nov-12 04:09:08

Poor you. Sounds like hell. Both my dc have story CDs and they love them. Also, we gave a classical music cd for if they have trouble sleeping. I think it makes them feel less lonely.

Last night my 6 year old was listening to some meditation cd I got when I couldn't sleep. I jumped out of my skin when I went to check on her.

piglettsmummy Thu 08-Nov-12 04:36:37

Noooo tv never!! That will only make the situation worse!!! How long has she been doing this ? I don't really have any advice other than she must learn to self settle in a dark room otherwise ur setting urself
Up for hell in the future!! Do you have Facebook? Well it doesn't matter actually! Google
"the children's sleep charity" they are ab fab!!! They will give u a few pointers that might help settle
Her better smile good luck!!

BackToB4Beatrice Thu 08-Nov-12 09:21:37

Thanks all you posts last night. She did fall asleep,eventually- but with me in her bed. Really really need to get this fixed, will by story tapes today. Feel utterly crap.

But I appreciated your support last night, fingers crossed it goes better tonight.

DaveMccave Thu 08-Nov-12 09:29:19

Could it be night terrors rather than her waking up do you think? My DD used to have them, shouting out in her sleep and sounding distressed, and the more I tried to comfort her the more she'd go into a rage until she was screaming and thrashing about for hours. I eventually learnt that although she looked awake when I first went in, she wasn't, and me trying to comfort her woke her up and sent her into a confused half asleep rage. Now a couple of years on, i can tell by her cries and shouts that she's asleep and I just leave her to it and she doesn't go into the rage.

valiumredhead Thu 08-Nov-12 09:46:41

These things tend to get worse before they get better - it sounds like it was a battle if will last night if you say she was outraged rather than upset.

I would just ride it out and make sure the bed time routines was always the same, bath, story,bed.

After that no interaction and keep taking her back to bed.

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