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To be dreading Christmas?

(150 Posts)
kensingtonkat Wed 07-Nov-12 20:07:21

I just don't want to do it this year. I didn't grow up in a religious family and we only ever did Christmas in a very half-hearted way.

DH's family makes a Bloody Big Grasping Showing Off Deal of it.

Everyone circulates long and elaborate Father Christmas lists - including the grandparents. I thought Father Christmas stops being real once you're seven, but it doesn't seem to get in the way of their requests.These people have everything they could possibly want and more than enough of the things they need. One year I asked for charitable presents from Oxfam Unwrapped and FIL told me it wasn't in the spirit of Christmas!

SIL goes completely overboard because she doesn't work, and makes very elaborate Martha Stewart style preparations in terms of food, drink, flowers, tree etc. She also hosts a glamorous drinks party on Christmas Eve with caterers and waiting staff. Then she produces Champagne Brunch and a huge Christmas Dinner. Because she has gone to so much trouble we feel compelled to join in. Oh, and DRESS UP like we're in Downton bloody Abbey.

I know it's unkind but I do spend much of the time thinking, "This is naff and excessive and in a recession you need to calm the f*ck down."

I also hate Midnight Mass, to which I am guilt-tripped into going against all religious principles.

I'm just sickened by the excess of it all. The greed and total lack of concern for the less fortunate. The sheer bloody futility of consumerism.

Djembe Wed 07-Nov-12 20:08:57

YANBU but I did laugh at the image of you grouching in the corner saying 'you all need to calm the fuck down' grin

Can I go instead it sounds ace

mutny Wed 07-Nov-12 20:12:33

Not being funny but they sound ace.

But I suppose if its not your thing and you HAVE to do it, it could be annoying.

How about (if its too late to back out this year) letting them all know, in January, that in 2013 you are having a quiet Christmas.

TakeMyEyesButNotTheGoat Wed 07-Nov-12 20:15:34

YABU I'd love that envy

YANBU with midnight mass. For the same reasons.

DeckSwabber Wed 07-Nov-12 20:15:49

What would you like to do?

If you don't have children, how about doing some seasonal volunteering? You could then turn up to one or two things and no-one can complain if you don't do it all.

Tryharder Wed 07-Nov-12 20:17:23

Oh stop being such a Grinch and enjoy it. It sounds fab!

monkeyfacegrace Wed 07-Nov-12 20:23:47


Christmas is ACE.

Dont be a fucking grump.

Life is for enjoying, recession or not.

You cant save the world, so dont try.

Eat, drink, be spoilt and enjoy dressing up.

miserable bitch

WelshMaenad Wed 07-Nov-12 21:14:03

Forgive my stupidity but provided that thru HAVE the money, is them spending it not actually a good thing in a recession?


ImperialBlether Wed 07-Nov-12 21:16:55

Sorry, OP, but it sounds as though they have a great time. It sounds a lot better than celebrating it in a half hearted way, as you were brought up to do.

What about your husband? Does he enjoy the celebrations? Do you have children together? If so, what do they think?

Pancakeflipper Wed 07-Nov-12 21:20:13

Book a holiday. Don't inflict your misery on them. My mother hates Christmas none of my siblings or me invite her anymore to stay for Christmas cos she has sulked and ruined too many so you could meet up with my mother and bah humbug away with a chocolate orange?

FunBagFreddie Wed 07-Nov-12 21:24:18

OP, I don't like Xmas either, if it wasn't for being a parent I wouldn't bother with it apart from the drinking. I'm already grumpy at the prospect of being expected to endlessly stuff my face with the ILs for the week, just so they don't get offended. Heartburn and wind ahoy!

Then there's the time between Xmas and New Year, a no man's land that's like a week of perpetual bank holiday Mondays.

I can't even spend the time getting pissed because I'll be with IL's and will have to be on my best behaviour and not make a tit of myself.

I'd rather work tbh.

YANBU. Some of us just don't like Xmas.

thixotropic Wed 07-Nov-12 21:33:08


Sounds ghastly.


ProphetOfDoom Wed 07-Nov-12 21:33:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TwitchyTail Wed 07-Nov-12 22:03:42

This is why I love having a job which means I sometimes have to work on Christmas Day and can pretend I have to even when I don't really

TheBigKidsDidIt Wed 07-Nov-12 22:09:55


I have the inevitability of Christmas, the way you just cannot avoid it.

I make an effort for the children, but if it were left to me I wouldn't have anything to do with it.

And your relatives make you DRESS UP! That would be such a dealbreaker, I would have to buy a leopard print onesie specially.

waltermittymissus Wed 07-Nov-12 22:14:46

They sound BRILLIANT. I am jealous.

Busyoldfool Wed 07-Nov-12 22:20:27

I'm with you OP and I have a similar SIL. Dreadful, dreadful, dreadful. I feel pressured into spending more money than I have, to fawning and grinning and saying how lovely everything is when I am hating every minute!! YANBU

ImperialBlether Wed 07-Nov-12 22:39:25

Funbag, how long do you spend with your ILs?

ilovesooty Wed 07-Nov-12 22:54:50

I'm with the OP. I think it sounds hideous.

Dozer Wed 07-Nov-12 23:03:00

Oooh, in an alternative reality I would very much enjoy being a random guest at the SIL's swanky do! Would be happy to listen to OP bitch away, as long as had plentiful champagne and nibbles.

butterfingerz Wed 07-Nov-12 23:31:15

Sorry, I'm of the 'sounds like fun' opinion... just put on some reindeer horns and go with it I'd say.

Sparklingbrook Wed 07-Nov-12 23:39:56

I am of the view that now in my forties I have done at least 40 Christmasses and should now be exempt. It's like going on the same holiday to the same place every year.

I go through the motions to please my DC. sad

YANBU-sounds hideous.

Rowanhart Wed 07-Nov-12 23:46:12

I'm officially jealous...

fuzzpig Wed 07-Nov-12 23:52:08

The big graspy Xmas lists are a bit hmm

Can you just not go this year? Just stay home?

MrsCantSayAnything Wed 07-Nov-12 23:58:49

yabu and

SIL goes completely overboard because she doesn't work,

Is bollocks. She MIGHT do it MAINLY because she enjoys it.

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