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to think DH could be abit more sensitive?

(15 Posts)
ditsydoll Wed 07-Nov-12 13:28:12

I'm 3 months pregnant, tired and trying to look after my 3yo DD. I have had some pretty nasty morning sickness and have really low blood pressure so I'm fainting a lot.

The house isn't always perfect and today DH decided to have a go at me for letting the house slip. He works night shifts so is in work all night and sleeps most of the day so I don't expect him to help with housework but think he could be abit more sensitive at the minute as I'm really tired and sick.

AIBU to be upset by this?

FutTheShuckUp Wed 07-Nov-12 13:29:13

LTB

Feminine Wed 07-Nov-12 13:30:49

YANBU.

As he has never been pregnant (or never likely to be :-) ) it is probable that he will never truly understand how wretched you must feel.

Not much anyone can say really, he shouldn't do it.

I'm sorry you feel so rough, I hope he starts to pull his finger out!

Whoknowswhocares Wed 07-Nov-12 13:31:50

Of course you aren't being unreasonable. Tell DH to do it himself if it bothers him!

fruitysummer Wed 07-Nov-12 13:32:25

Just because he works night shifts doesn't mean he can't move his lazy arse and help you.

My husband works shifts which includes nights. He is in the house more than I am and therefore has more sense than to criticise me.

You are not BU to be upset. You are U to excuse his lack of household duties because he works nights.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 07-Nov-12 13:35:28

Tell him to get his finger out and help.

DialsMavis Wed 07-Nov-12 13:38:55

What an arse hole. My DP is lazy bastard sometimes and as I am currently unemployed and he works really long hours most of the housework falls to me. But, if the house is a tip because I have been busy with The DC (my current job, for the hours he is at work) then he certainly would never have a go at me about it. He would either do it himself if it bothered him, or if he was too busy or tired then it would get done when I had the time.

I am not pregnant, Vomiting and fainting, if I was he would look after me, the DC and the house! I'm not boasting, he is just a normal person

Alibabaandthe40nappies Wed 07-Nov-12 13:40:49

Why isn't he helping you? He sounds like a twat.

samandi Wed 07-Nov-12 13:41:15

Of course YANBU. Of course he is BU. Do you really need to ask? confused

ditsydoll Wed 07-Nov-12 13:48:15

He does work really hard so I'm not too bothered about doing the housework but when I can and in my own time, I really don't think he gets how unwell I'm feeling and I just wish he was abit more supportive, but what do I say? He obviously thinks its ok to have a go about me not doing the housework.. iv told him how tired I am and how I'm struggling but he obviously thinks I'm pulling the wool..

EuroShagmore Wed 07-Nov-12 13:52:41

Keep a diary of how you are feeling/how often you are throwing up for a couple of days and then show it to him. If he is in bed after his shifts, he won't see how bad you are.

SoftKittyWarmKitty Wed 07-Nov-12 13:54:04

Tell him if it bothers him that much he can pay for a cleaner.

tallwivglasses Wed 07-Nov-12 13:55:21

Get his mum and friends on your side. Especially if he has any male friends who are dads. Get them to tell him to man-up and get hoovering, the insensitive twat.

DialsMavis Wed 07-Nov-12 13:55:23

I am the same re: not minding doing the house work as DP is working so hard. But, you should never have to justify not doing it to a certain standard. He is not your line manager/ the factory foreman of the house.

ditsydoll Wed 07-Nov-12 14:05:06

I know I did say that I was doing my best and told him to be abit more considerate because I'm so sick but he obv just doesn't get it...

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