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To think someone could sit at my house for an hour

(29 Posts)
Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 12:57:25

I am going to visit my mum in hospital tonight, its over an hour away so ill be gone a while. My dp is working nights. My dad is going to have ds ( they are no longer together so he wont be visiting ) but obviously ds has school in the morning. I was going to give him a key so he could bring ds back at 7 and get him into bed then he would only need to sit here until i get back between half eight and half nine. Jus spoken to him and he says no, if ds goes to him then he sleeps there all night . He wont keep him awake till i get back because he says its not fair on him but doesnt have any breakfast stuff ( whole other thread - he isnt working so has no food in at all and no heating on) or his school things.
Im really grateful that hes watching him for me so i can visit but i have been so upset every night ive come back from the hospital. im dreading coming home to an empty house and not seeing ds at all since 9am. We live really close to each other probably 5 minute walk at most. Aibu to bring ds home at 9pm sad or just to wish that he would come and sit with him

HoratiaWinwood Tue 06-Nov-12 13:01:20

What a horrible situation for you. I wouldn't have thought it was too much to ask that he watch DS at your house, no.

frootshoots Tue 06-Nov-12 13:02:56

Can your dad not stay at your house for the night?

BraaaaaainsButterfield Tue 06-Nov-12 13:02:58

Can't see why it wouldn't be preferable for your dad to sit at yours where I assume there is food and heating.

squeakytoy Tue 06-Nov-12 13:03:30

How old is DS? One late night of you bringing him home at 9pm shouldnt be too much disruption.

vodkaanddietirnbru Tue 06-Nov-12 13:05:24

what age is your ds? Could you send your ds with spare clothes/breakfast stuff? Or if you really want him back then go and collect him when you get back from the hospital regardless of what your dad says as it really isnt up to him anyway.

SpookTheCat Tue 06-Nov-12 13:08:16

If you have no other options of chilcare then i would go and collect him as soon as you get back. One late night wont do him any harm

i dont understand why your dad wouldn't sit at yours though, he seems to be creating uneccessary problems for you

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:09:50

my ds is five, i can send with him with some stuff i just really wanted to see him.Things arent good and if i dont go today i wont get to see her at all this week which i dont want to risk. My dad wont sit at mine, i dont know why. just wont entertain the idea at all, he could easily walk home when im back within 5 mins and yes he could eat/watch tv,have internet access here i dont know what the problem is.

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:11:14

i dont understand either, partner is on nights so would just be ds in bed and dad here. He has just got over a really bad neck where he had a week off school due to an injury so im concerned about him being cold, and sleeping there. His bed there is a floor level bed if that makes sense.

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:12:02

No other option of childcare. dp at work, sister is driving us to hospital and both grandparents are mid 70s and not in brilliant health.

CheungFun Tue 06-Nov-12 13:12:06

I think it would make more sense for your dad to watch tv at your house and then your son can be warm, fed and go to bed at his usual time. Have you asked your dad why he doesn't want to stay at yours?

AitchDee Tue 06-Nov-12 13:12:49

I'd collect him t nine, bring him home and put him to bed.

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:13:18

No reasonable answer, just keeps skirting around me saying that if he just came here at bedtime he could sit until i came back and ds would be in his own bed. I literally have no idea why he wont stay.

SpookTheCat Tue 06-Nov-12 13:17:43

I wouldn't want my Dc's to stay in a house where the heating is not switched on at all. The house must be freezing especially now that the outside temps are dropping.

Have you not got a friend that would sit with your DS instead?

IloveJudgeJudy Tue 06-Nov-12 13:19:04

Why can't you ask a friend or another mother in DS's class at the school? Ime at times like this, people will rally around and help each other. Really, if you'd asked me, I'd have said yes. I have found that someone helped me, I helped someone else, they helped someone else and so it went around.

RuleBritannia Tue 06-Nov-12 13:21:01

No neighbours who wouldn't mind an hour at your place? Or a neighbour's teenage child?

Justforlaughs Tue 06-Nov-12 13:21:26

Where are you? I bet there's someone on here would sit for you.

HeathRobinson Tue 06-Nov-12 13:24:41

I'd take ds with me. Your mum might appreciate it too?

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:24:55

Neighbours probably not, we know each other to say hi to and the odd chat but not that well. ds a very fussy child about who he stays with especially since my mum got so poorly hes very clingy but good idea friend with friend though. My dad has a heater on downstairs but doesnt heat the house if you see what i mean.

Caerlaverock Tue 06-Nov-12 13:27:25

Can't you just go and get your d's in the morning and feed him breakfast at home?

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:29:04

I think that might be what i have to do caerlaverock , we only live about 5 minutes but i dont drive so means ds walking home at around 9pm if hes still awake if i get him tonight.

Waitingforastartofall Tue 06-Nov-12 13:29:59

would love to heath itd give her a huge boost but sadly no children allowed have spoken to the nurses already

confuugled Tue 06-Nov-12 13:31:59

Nope - I'd go and pick up your ds at 9pm.

Tell your dad that you can pick your ds up - will your sister help you by driving you directly to your dad's and then does she have a car seat in so he can be legally driven home? So he won't really be woken up too much by it, sell it to your ds as exciting and magical to go to sleep in one bed and wake up in another!

good luck - sounds like there is a reason why your dad doesn't want to be in your house - have you asked him directly why he won't be in your house (as opposed to asking him sit in your house and that it would be better for ds - is there some reason that he thinks it would be better for him to be at his own house? somebody calling or wants to look at stuff on the internet that he has got all the links and passwords etc set up for (not trying to suggest that he is looking at anything dodgy; but not sure I'd relish dh going through my MN history if I was browsing on his PC iyswim!)

Narked Tue 06-Nov-12 13:34:28

Pick him up at 9pm.

Sorry about your mother.

HeathRobinson Tue 06-Nov-12 13:35:39

Oh that's a shame. Could you take him and alternate seeing your mum while you/your sister watch ds?

Hope your mum gets better soon.

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