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To think that the question 'why are you a vegetarian' is exceptionally rude

(284 Posts)
Partypartyrings Mon 05-Nov-12 08:01:52

I've had twenty-five years of it and I'm hacked off with it.

I don't give one flying shit what you eat, so why is what I eat so interesting?

Being a vegetarian is not something exotic, surely you've heard/met one before, don't bloody ask me, use your imagination.

And no, I don't fucking miss bacon, in fact it makes me heave.

And no, what I choose to eat is not some sort of judgement on what you eat so stop being so defensive about it.

Develop some manners- it is rude to question/comment on what somebody is eating.

Grr. There. Public service announcement over.

MrsWolowitz Mon 05-Nov-12 08:04:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CailinDana Mon 05-Nov-12 08:04:44

When you're not the "norm" you get silly comments on it. I get comments on being left handed, being Irish, wearing glasses rather than contacts, not shaving my legs etc etc. It's annoying but if you're secure in yourself you can brush it off. These days I mostly just laugh if a person makes a silly comment. I don't really feel the need to be polite any more.

MrsWolowitz Mon 05-Nov-12 08:04:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tee2072 Mon 05-Nov-12 08:05:23

You seem awfully defensive about being a vegetarian. Perhaps you aren't actually happy being one?

Perhaps people would like to learn. Or become one themselves. Or many other reasons for asking.

Smile politely and answer. It won't kill you.

mutny Mon 05-Nov-12 08:06:22

Wow, really?

SomersetONeil Mon 05-Nov-12 08:08:25

I've never asked that question. But... OKaaaaaay.....

<backs slowly away from OP without ever taking eyes off OP>

SissySpacekAteMyHamster Mon 05-Nov-12 08:11:17

As a vegetarian for a similar amount of time as you, I have had my fair share of comments on my choices. I don't mind people asking why I'm vegetarian and will answer them happily.

I do mind when people just want to pick at my choices and ask the question ready to shoot me down or argue with me. I tend to ignore the dickheads.

Fakebook Mon 05-Nov-12 08:11:49

Sooo...why are you a vegetarian?

lljkk Mon 05-Nov-12 08:12:02

yabu, I was vegetarian for 16 years & never minded being asked why. It's just chitchat. If people are rude about what you eat then they're probably rude about everything and that's a (much bigger) different problem than idle chitchat curiousity.

TeacupTempest Mon 05-Nov-12 08:12:09


I eat wild killed meat ( though in practise that's hardly ever) and fish. People are lwaysDo asking me why. Mosly I don't mind but sometimes it feels very much like I am being asked to defend and justify my eating choices. It's a pain.

lljkk Mon 05-Nov-12 08:12:22

(have you got a flame-proof suit on, Fakebook? wink)

kim147 Mon 05-Nov-12 08:12:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fluffyraggies Mon 05-Nov-12 08:14:52

I would imagine in those 25 years the question 'why are you a veggie?' has been framed in so many different ways and in many different circumstances.

Some of the time, surely, it has been purely out of friendly interest or even as an opener for a person wanting to become a veggie themselves and seeking advice maybe?

I'm very good at drawing and painting and get fed up with being asked ' why don't you do it for a living?!!' as if i'm perpetrating a crime against mankind by not doing it for a living! But i don't get that hacked off about it ...

Chill, OP grin

SomersetONeil Mon 05-Nov-12 08:17:34

'Exceptionally rude' is hoiking a phlegm ball into someone's sandwich, making off with their husband and then laughing. It is not asking someone why they're a vegetarian.

akaemmafrost Mon 05-Nov-12 08:18:16

I agree OP.

I was a vegetarian for 7 years, still don't really like meat, though do eat fish. Some people used to get positively angry when I told them in a "FGS! Why!?" kind of why, usually followed by undermining and ridiculing of my choice and listing the vegetarian cliches, also letting me know why MY choice to be a vegetarian wasn't making a difference to animal welfare in any, way, shape or form. Not making this up, it happened loads and mainly men I have to say.

It happens A LOT.

Partypartyrings Mon 05-Nov-12 08:19:34

I'm very happy being a vegetarian. I'm just annoyed at people asking me my reasons. It's rude.

Do I ask you why you eat meat? Why you've had x many children? Why you drive x car? No, I bloody don't.

It also implies that meat-eating is the standard, that I am deviating from something. In some cultures around the world vegetarianism is the norm.

PrincessOfChina Mon 05-Nov-12 08:19:57

I find my vegetarian friends have varying reasons for not eating meat - some don't eat it on moral grounds (so I would be extra cautious about meat products around them, like gelatine, cheese) and some just don't like meat so don't eat it. I feel it's polite to ask.

CailinDana Mon 05-Nov-12 08:20:59

It's not the norm in UK society. Hence the stupid questions.

You have asked stupid questions in your time. I guarantee it. Everybody does.

BadgersBottom Mon 05-Nov-12 08:21:31

Did you, by any unfortunate chance, step out of bed straight into some fresh cat shit this morning? No? Knicker elastic gone? Milk turned overnight? No coffee in the house? Only you seem ever so wound up and if you keep this up you could be dead by 6pm. For heaven's sake calm the fuck down!

fluffyraggies Mon 05-Nov-12 08:21:51

Ah - but within those cultures a meat eater would then probably get asked why they are carnivorous wink

mutny Mon 05-Nov-12 08:22:44

But the question 'why are you vegetarian?'
Itself is not rude. It depends on how its said, surely.
Some people may be genuinely interested and/or considering it themselves. So people may be rude, but the questions is automatically rude.
There are lots of reasons to be vegetarian why get upset.
I have a very unusual edit people ask why. Its because I spend alot of time strength training and its the diet to support that. I wouldn't get offended unless the person asking was really shitty.

PeggyCarter Mon 05-Nov-12 08:22:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fairenuff Mon 05-Nov-12 08:24:04

Some people don't like the taste/texture of meat.

Some people don't like the thought of eating flesh.

Some people believe it's cruel or unnecessary to kill for food.

And I'm sure there are other reasons.

They are not all the same, so it's not that strange to ask someone to share their thoughts and opinions. Just like you might on any other subject, such as religion.

If you don't want to share, just say so but I think you are unreasonable to expect people not to ask.

Personally, I would like to know, why are you a vegetarian, but if you don't want to tell me, just say, I'd rather not say. I don't think that would make either of us rude would it?

MrsWolowitz Mon 05-Nov-12 08:24:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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