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To be annoyed at DM for wanting DS2 (9 years old) to fly unaccompanied

(20 Posts)
AnnaLiza Sun 04-Nov-12 18:44:59

We're having lots of issues with DS2 and he's always been very close to my mum who lives 2 hours away by airplane in a different European country so today she's been forcefully (like she normally does) tried to convince me to put him on a plane to hers with unaccompanied minor assistance to spend a few days with her. I tried saying that I wouldn't be comfortable with that and DS2 also would not want to do it (this has come up before and he's said so himself) but she sneered and gave me the "don't be ridiculous" line.
AIBU for not wanting him to fly by himself and to be annoyed that she can't respect my opinion?

SpectralMissSpooky Sun 04-Nov-12 18:47:05

I'd not listen to the advice of somebody who sneers at your opinion. Tell her to bog off.

TheVermiciousKnid Sun 04-Nov-12 18:49:27

It's entirely your decision (with input from your DS!) and your mother is unreasonable.

Having said that, my daughter flew as an unaccompanied minor at that age (and my son when he was younger, but together with his big sister) and loved it!

DowntonTrout Sun 04-Nov-12 18:49:51

YANBU to not want to send him if you don't want to.

But, 9 yo is fine to fly as an unaccompanied minor. Especially on a really short flight like that. My son did it from age 8 with no problems at all, in fact he really enjoyed his little adventures.

Your DM is not BU to suggest it, but it is your choice.

mymatemax Sun 04-Nov-12 18:50:01

unacompanied minor assistance is actually hard to find & very expensive.
May be cheaper for her to fly over & collect him

MadCap Sun 04-Nov-12 18:52:11

I flew alone at that age quite frequently, but if your ds doesn't want to that's that really.

Mintyy Sun 04-Nov-12 18:52:11

Your son doesn't want to do it. Is it the flying or the being with his grandma? If he'd like to go and visit her and you don't mind that then could you re-think your stance on unaccompanied flying? It really is no biggie, even at 9.

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda Sun 04-Nov-12 18:52:32

Well it's entirely up to you what you do with your child. However flying with unaccompanied minor assistance is perfectly safe. My daughter has done it many times.

cozietoesie Sun 04-Nov-12 18:53:31

I flew unaccompanied for the first time at 4 years old - and had a great time. (I wasn't scared of flying back then!)

I'm told that when the plane arrived at its destination I disembarked, got to the arrival hall and waved off the flight assistant with a grand 'I'm all right now - I see my uncle. Thank you!'

Your call of course - but your DS should be fine if it's just the flying that's your concern.

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda Sun 04-Nov-12 18:56:29

unacompanied minor assistance is actually hard to find & very expensive.

No it isn't. Most proper airlines (ie not Ryanair) have it on every flight and we only paid about £20 for it.

IneedAsockamnesty Sun 04-Nov-12 18:57:27

i used to from about 5 or 6 quite frequently never had an issue with it however if your not happy then your dc shouldnt do it.

mymatemax Sun 04-Nov-12 18:59:05

Really flamin, I've been trying to get unaccompanied minor assistance from London to Gran Canaria for 2 yrs without luck.
Many airlines have stopped it on short haul flights.

Fairylea Sun 04-Nov-12 18:59:34

Yanbu. Especially as your son doesn't want to do it either.

My dd is the same age and she has just come back from a week with her dad in the USA and she flew with her grandparents there and back. Personally I think 9 is a bit too young but maybe my view is coloured by the fact dd went a long distance and not a short trip like your ds would be doing.

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda Sun 04-Nov-12 19:04:04

Yeah, I live abroad and have sent my daughter back to UK unaccompanied several times a year since we emigrated. Technically she hasn't even needed it for years because she's over 12, but she has AS so we book it anyway so she doesn't end up on a flight to Mars

AnnaLiza Sun 04-Nov-12 19:07:19

Agree. It's the fact DM doesn't even contemplate that you may be entitled to a different opinion to hers which I find upsetting, not the suggestion in itself. I later asked my DS to tell her himself that he didn't want to and when she spoke to he said "thank you but I'd rather not" her reply was (she was on loudspeaker) "oh come on!" angry

mymatemax Sun 04-Nov-12 19:10:17

Flamin, ive been trying to send my son to family in gran canaria every holiday for last 2 yrs BUT they wont take him under 16. Will look again, I dont want him changing in Amsterdam so have only been looking at direct flight.
I shall try again.

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda Sun 04-Nov-12 19:11:44

Mymate, we've use either SAS or BA as she's flying from Sweden.

firemansamisnormansdad Sun 04-Nov-12 19:12:05

I'm with mymatemax on this. Get DM to come over and escort him both ways. It's not the money, but the principle. If she feels so strongly that getting DS over to hers is the right thing to do then she should have his best interests at heart and accompany him on the plane.

mymatemax Sun 04-Nov-12 19:26:32

It depends entirely on the route & the airline then. I could get accompanied BA flight changing at Amsterdam, Berlin or Madrid (i think) and then on to another carrier but it is hundreds of pounds, far cheaper to book family a return Ryanair or Thomas Cook to take him.

Sarahplane Sun 04-Nov-12 20:07:28

Completely your call but I flew unaccompanied at 9 and loved it. They showed me the cockpit and let me 'fly the plane'.

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