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Boyfriend dragging heals with holiday - AIBU to book without him?

(8 Posts)
ConversationConstipation Sun 04-Nov-12 14:46:49

A few months ago my boyfriend came up with the idea of us going to America on holiday next year. We talked about it and because of my work commitments the only time I'd be able to go in next March. Doesn't give us much time but financially it's not a problem, it's just the planning and organisation we need to get moving with.

Anyway he brought it up periodically (as did I) with new ideas and suggestions as to what we should do whilst over there. He'd done a bit of homework and looked into flights etc so I told DS what we were planning - he's really excited.

However, 2 months on and nothing has been booked or even organised properly. It's November now - 4 months until March.

I brought it up with him a few nights ago and asked if he still wanted to go, he said he did but has just been too busy to look into it. I told him time was ticking and we need to get a move on with it - he agreed and asked me to look up visa/hotels and he'd look up flights/villa. I agreed.

I spent the night doing my part of the deal - days later I asked if he'd looked up anything - he replied "not yet, not had the time".

I'm getting pissed off with it now. Would it be unreasonable to give him until the end of November to do SOMETHING or just book a holiday for me and the kids without him?

We don't live together and finances are totally separate if it makes a difference.

DontmindifIdo Sun 04-Nov-12 15:07:58

don't nag again, just quietly do your own research, book the time off work now, end of November if he's not brought it up again, just book for you and the DCs. Do'nt mention it again to him.

As I said on your other thread, I think you might be unsuited long term so don't book an expensive holiday with him for so far in advance. Plus you don't seem to be getting a lot of commitment from him, so why should he get to come on your big family holiday?

mutny Sun 04-Nov-12 15:53:55

I am going st the beginning of Jan and haven't booked anything. Never do until the last minute.
Is this what he is doing?

alphabite Sun 04-Nov-12 16:05:27

I never book more than 3 months in advance. I often have left it till the week before!

VivaLeBeaver Sun 04-Nov-12 16:13:03

Why don't you get all the info together, work out prices. Say flights are x, were stopping here and it's x for the hotel, write me a cheque for your share and I'll book it. Sounds like my Dh, expects me to sort it all out.

HecatePhosphorus Sun 04-Nov-12 16:45:29

you know, some people are just talkers. Big plans that come to nothing.

maybe he's one. Or if not one, had an episode of it grin

In your shoes, I'd just tell him that you would be booking a holiday for you and the kids by X date. If he is planning on coming, that's his deadline to pay his share and get organised, otherwise you'll be going without him.

The other possibility is he's going to turn out to be one of those blokes who leaves everything to you. And you'll end up buying presents for his mum and reminding him when his sister's birthday is.

Half partner, half P.A.

If he seems delighted when you say you're going to sort it out and throws you the money for his share, then you know grin

roses2 Sun 04-Nov-12 16:53:49

Sounds like a typical man to me, my husband is exactly the same. Just make plans for you and your children, then when it comes to booking, ask he he wants to and if he won't commit then just book without him.

CaliforniaLeaving Sun 04-Nov-12 19:27:36

Don't book with him unless you know for sure he can pass the ESTA (visa waiver) questions or he won't be going anywhere and you'll be out money.

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