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To sell (rather than give) all my baby clothes & equipment to a friend?

(62 Posts)
ilikeyoursleeves Tue 30-Oct-12 07:17:54

A work mate / friend is currently expecting her first baby and I have just had my last baby (I have 3), so I am looking to clear out all my baby stuff and she is looking to buy. I have known her for about 10 years and although I'd describe us as friends, we aren't particularly close or anything, we get on well at work but have only gone out socially together about 5 times over the years. However we are a bit closer more recently since she has become pregnant.

Anyway, given we are friends it feels a bit awkward now for me to ask her for money for the baby stuff. I gave her all my maternity clothes for nothing but I have absolutely loads of clothes, plus the usual Moses basket, steriliser etc to get rid of. Given the price we originally paid for everything I think I'd need to charge something but given she is a friend I have no idea how much to ask for, it seems a bit awkward somehow but I know she'll insist on paying something too.

So Aibu in asking for money? If not, how much (% of original costs) should I ask for?

reddemonsinthegarden Tue 30-Oct-12 07:20:53

i gave all of my stuff away. I never wanted or expected any money for it all. life ISN'T all about money. Friendship is far more important.
(Not meaning to preach, sleeves; I obviously don't know your personal circumstances).

TwitchyTail Tue 30-Oct-12 07:22:05

Honestly, I wouldn't. I'm pregnant and would be very taken aback if someone asked me if I wanted to buy their second-hand stuff (and possibly feel guilted into doing even if I didn't want it).

What I would do is list them for sale on Preloved or similar, and try to sell them that way. You could always mention to her that you've done this and give her a discount on the lot - if she asks

waitingimpatiently Tue 30-Oct-12 07:22:42

Tell her you are selling it (on car boot sale or wherever). If she asks about it, bring her to your house, tell her the price of everything and if she wants it, she'll buy it. If not, get it on car boot or wherever.

Gumby Tue 30-Oct-12 07:24:14

I'd tell her you're selling it & if she wants the lot it's £30

Poosnu Tue 30-Oct-12 07:25:15

I'm not sure I would ask for money here. If you want to sell your things I would do it separately - if your friend asks you could tell her you need to sell. She might offer to pay something.

Dinosaurhunter Tue 30-Oct-12 07:25:35

I gave all my stuff away would never take money , in fact I have a pile of my sons clothes I add to when they get too small that I pass on to friends with smaller boys .

horsebiscuit Tue 30-Oct-12 07:26:47

That's good if she'll insist on paying something. I'd say about one third or 25% depending on how heavily used the item is (sounds like they have been through three DC).
I gave my stuff to someone for free. We're broke. She said thank you very much and then spent £600 on a brand new pram- more than three times as expensive as mine. More fool me. I don't blame her- I was a twit in not mentioning money. Not a close friend BTW.

fedupofnamechanging Tue 30-Oct-12 07:28:49

Have you already told her she can have/buy them?

If not, I'd put them on ebay and completely keep discussions about money out of your relationship.

This is fraught with potential problems - if you are charging her, then she will want to be selective as to what she buys. Are you then going to feel offended if she rejects certain things?

I suppose you could say, that you were going to sell them on ebay, but she can have first refusal, if she would like. Tell her that you have earmarked the money for something specific that you wouldn't be able to afford if you didn't sell these things.

I wouldn't view giving them away as a 'loss' though - you bought them to use for your children and you needed to have them, whether you could re sell or not, so any money you make is a bonus.

I gave away all my baby stuff - second hand things are not worth anywhere near their original price. In a way she is doing you a favour by taking it all off your hands.

pigletmania Tue 30-Oct-12 07:29:55

I would just sell it at car boot, e bay etc, and just tell her that you need the money and the rice of various items if she is interested.

MaudTheGardenTheBlackBatNight Tue 30-Oct-12 07:31:29

You say she is looking to buy, so why not say to her that you have lots of stuff to sell and she can have first pick? To judge by NCT sales, you can sell big items of equipment for about their original price, but clothes for less than that. As she's a friend you could offer her a discount but I don't see any problem in selling it rather than giving it to her. And bear in mind that if she takes the whole lot off your hands she's doing you a favour, too.

MrsKeithRichards Tue 30-Oct-12 07:31:54

You get very little for second hand stuff anyway. I'd list it on gumtree or wherever and tell her.

You don't want to give her the stuff but don't make her feel obliged to buy it and be realistic. 3 babies later your stuff is used.

SmoothOperandus Tue 30-Oct-12 07:32:53

Realistically just how much money do you think you could get if you listed the items on ebay for example? To that you have to add the aggravation of listing everything, sellers fees, and then posting the stuff, and with that you'll incur further postage and packaging costs. It depends of what you've got to offer but I would personally just be happy to pass it on.

Brycie Tue 30-Oct-12 07:34:14

I think it's fine to sell your stuff. She won't mind, she's already had lots off you.

Brycie Tue 30-Oct-12 07:34:30

Sell it to her I mean! I'm sure she'll understand.

MaudTheGardenTheBlackBatNight Tue 30-Oct-12 07:34:32

Err, about half their original price ....

bedmonster Tue 30-Oct-12 07:34:58

I wouldn't personally. If you were happy enough to pay for what you used then you have already said goodbye to the money.

YWNBU to go on and ebay/carboot them but if it was going to a friend, then no. I have just had DC3 (and final!) and have had to buy everything new again. Literally everything, cot, basket, travel system, baby carrier, baby bouncer, bumbo, steriliser, stroller, the works. Everything bar the stroller which we currently use has been donated to various other friends or family.

However, if you couldn't really afford to buy the things in the first place and really need the money then sell them on, just not to your friend. I would let her know you're thinking of ebaying everything (if it comes up in conversation) and that she's welcome to first dibs before it goes on.

MrsKeithRichards Tue 30-Oct-12 07:35:05

Big items for their original price? I hardly think so! My bugaboo is 6 years old now and cost me more than £600 back then. It's on baby 2 and I've had my moneys worth. If I can to sell it I'd be happy with £100 and think that it would an really cheeky to expect much more.

Check out your local facebook selling page.

Brycie Tue 30-Oct-12 07:36:19

OPeople are right in saying you waon't get much for it, and you should fator in the reduction of effort by not advertising, paying car boot, paying ebay etc. I think even a third of the price is too high.

HeinousHecate Tue 30-Oct-12 07:36:36

Take a look on ebay and see how much the sort of things you've got have sold for and quote that.

ClaireMarathonFeeder Tue 30-Oct-12 07:37:06

It does depend on the state of things, I have recently sold stuff to someone I know, but it was bought brand new for 3&4 baby twins, since I hadn't kept sny of my old stuff. So they were virtually new.

What I said though was"I am about to sell xyz, would uou be interested before I pug on ebay?"

In my case sge was very happy to accept smile

You can fo half price if it's nearly new (but not for clothes), but for heavily used stuff I would go for a nominal amount tbh

Eskarina Tue 30-Oct-12 07:37:52

Speaking from the other side as it were, a colleague (and one I have remained friends with even now we've both moved on) said to me when I was pg that she was clearing out her baby stuff and I should let her know if I was interested. Maybe because it was the big stuff - cot bed and crib etc rather than clothes I wouldn't have dreamed of not paying her for them. We had a couple of confused moments when she couldn't decide how much she wanted for some of the smaller things so we ended up agreeing a cost for the big things individually and I added a bit on for the extra bits.
But having said that I've also received lots of clothes and bits and bobs from other people and always ask if they want them back when I'm done (if they did I wouldn't take them because I can't cope with the whole who gave me what dilemma) or if I should pass them on to the next person in our church to need them. The answer is always to pass them on. I wouldn't pay for things like clothes because I want to choose them if they're going to cost me money.

I would let your friend know that you have bits to sell if she's interested and leave it at that. But I think being clear at the start that they are for sale not giving will be much easier than getting any further down the line and it getting awkward and messy.
Or would try to sell the lot at the next nct sale and give her anything that doesn't sell.

MaudTheGardenTheBlackBatNight Tue 30-Oct-12 07:38:43

That was a typo that I've corrected, MrsKeithRichards! Obviously used stuff doesn't sell for its original price. Our NCT branch used to reccomenf selling buggies etc that were in good condition for roughly half their new price. Tatty stuff needed to be cheap to sell.

Alligatorpie Tue 30-Oct-12 07:38:49

I gave all mine away, then had to re-buy for dd2.

I am currently buying winter clothes for dd2 ( we live overseas) on eBay and can't believe the prices - I would give stuff away rather than try to sell clothes for a quid!

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Tue 30-Oct-12 07:39:47

You could follow a few listings of similar items on eBay to see what they fetch.

You could charge for the big items and chuck the clothes in for free (baby clothes are very cheap)

I think it's fine for you to charge but she may well not take the lot on that basis. I gave our high chair away to someone who was just thinking about getting one for weaning - I said if it suits you keep it, if not, give it back. If I'd charged even a tenner, she would have thought about it a bit more no doubt.

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