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to wish my boss would stop saying, 'just between you and me' before telling me stuff i don't need to know?.

(7 Posts)
thatlldopigthatlldo Mon 29-Oct-12 19:10:10

Remind me never to tell her anything.

She keeps telling me stuff that other people have specifically asked her not to talk about with anybody.

Then....when the person does decide to tell me, I have to fake surprise.

It's so annoying. Just don't tell me!!!

AIBU? I don't think so, but it's a new job. I'm a team leader with her line managing me and sharing an office, so maybe that's what happens in management?

NapOfTheDamned Mon 29-Oct-12 19:29:47

It's very unprofessional and YANBU at all.

ScreamingManAndGoryOn Mon 29-Oct-12 19:34:20

No, not unreasonable at all. So unprofessional.

Never, ever, ever say anything to her that you don't want to be broadcast across the office.

Euphemiaaaarrrrgggghhhh Mon 29-Oct-12 19:36:05

I had a boss like this - it was a case of divide and conquer. He had everyone thinking they were in his confidence, while he slagged off and gossiped about every member of his staff behind their backs.

He was poison. Ask her to stop. Don't engage in the tittle-tattle.

NapOfTheDamned Mon 29-Oct-12 19:42:19

Can you say something like...

'I just had a rather awkward situation with Liz, she just told me something in confidence that you had already told me about and I had to fake surprise. I believe she thought she had previously told you in confidence, and not expected you to have mentioned it to anyone else,including me.

My acting skills aren't brilliant and it's really important to me to be honest and trusting with my team and respect confidences. Would you mind being careful what you tell me about in future? My management style is that I find it works better when staff tell me their issues themselves.'

thatlldopigthatlldo Mon 29-Oct-12 20:47:29

so far i've adopted a 'nod and smile' approach. and try not to encourage the conversation without being rude.

crappity crap.

Euphemiaaaarrrrgggghhhh Mon 29-Oct-12 20:55:42

Nod and smile is no good - it makes you look complicit.

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