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AIBU?

..to tell children off when they were making a row at parents' evenings?

43 replies

alcofrolic · 27/10/2012 16:33

Parent interviews were taking place nearby. I told some children off (three times) for running around, trashing toys, treating the furniture like playground equipment and screaming their heads off.

Their parents were sitting there doing and saying nothing.

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Sparklingbroomstick · 27/10/2012 16:40

YANBU. If both parents are able to go one of them should stay home with the siblings IMO.

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Sparklingbroomstick · 27/10/2012 16:41

What age are we talking for the schoolchildren alco?

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BackforGood · 27/10/2012 16:43

You "just" another parent, or a member of staff ?

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alcofrolic · 27/10/2012 17:13

5-7 years old.
Member of staff.

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JoanBias · 27/10/2012 17:14

Why are there children at parents evening?

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WorraLiberty · 27/10/2012 17:14

If you're a member of staff, surely that's your job? Confused

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ZZZenAgain · 27/10/2012 17:15

doesn't sound U to me. How did the parents react to what you did?

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GhostofMammaTJ · 27/10/2012 17:16

YWNBU, but I imagine you with a bottle of gin in a paper bag in your top desk drawer from your name. Grin

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Sparklingbroomstick · 27/10/2012 17:17

Exactly Joan.

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teacherwith2kids · 27/10/2012 17:19

Joan, at ours (both the ones I do at school, and the ones for my own children) children are expected to attend with their parents.

Tricky situations arise around siblings - e.g. both parents and the child in my class want to be there for the meeting, so who looks after the younger or older siblings? I set up a special area of my classroom for siblings, with books and a couple of quiet toys to occupy them for 10 minutes, so that the children are safe and the main meeting undisturbed - however I know that this is not universal practice. While they are in my classroom, I consider it my job to manage the behaviour of all the children - both the main child and the siblings. In the rest of the school while waiting for meetings, the head keeps a general eye and quells any riotous behaviour.

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alcofrolic · 27/10/2012 17:21

They did nothing. They didn't apologise or call their children to them.

The children reacted (for a time, anyway) - until I closed the door and started my next PI.

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Sparklingbroomstick · 27/10/2012 17:21

I don't know why both parents have to attend. Confused

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alcofrolic · 27/10/2012 17:26

We only see parents, so inevitably that does create problems.

teacher if siblings are in the room, how do you deal with their incessant demands for attention from their parents? How can the parents concnetrate on what you're saying?

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teacherwith2kids · 27/10/2012 17:31

I tell the siblings that they have to sit, quietly, in the area that I have prepared for them. If they are older, then I have often taught them. If toddlers or younger, they get to sit up at the table with their parents, but I tell them that they have to be absolutely silent.

I make it clear that I expect them to be quiet, and they are. Certainly I have had no problems of siblings demanding attention from their parents. Maybe I'm just scary!

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teacherwith2kids · 27/10/2012 17:33

Sparkling,

Whyt shouldnb't both parents attend? The mums often have more day-to-day contact with the school, so parents' evening is a time for dads to get to look round the school, look through the books, meet the teacher etc.

Regardless, siblings in 1-parent families would remain an issue so we might as well have a system that doesn't discriminate against them.

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ByTheWay1 · 27/10/2012 17:36

perhaps both attend because they are showing they are united in the care of their children, perhaps they both want to be responsible for their kids education and want to see their kids workbooks, perhaps both parents bring different things to the discussion - I ask the "right" questions according to my hubby - and he remembers salient points... we are a team...

our kids sit outside the classroom and wait for us. I have told other kids off for messing around in the past - sometimes just "the look" is all it takes.....

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teacherwith2kids · 27/10/2012 17:39

I should probaby clarify what the system is where I work. All parents wait in the hall, where the Head is in charge. We fetch families one at a time, and it is clear that I am in charge of whoever I take out of the hall - I do the 'right, when you get into the classroom there is an area for x, y and z, I expect you to be quiet there, child a you can stay with your mum and dad but you need to be as quiet as a mouse' conversation on the brief walk down to my classroom each time.

It's a school with a very high proportion of disadvantaged families, but within the school behaviour is outstanding, so that seems to rub off on behaviour at parents' evenings as well.

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ninah · 27/10/2012 17:39

children are welcome at our school, too
they know how to behave, fortunately - if they were being disruptive I would tell them

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halcyondays · 27/10/2012 17:41

DH both attend because we're both parents and want to hear how our dc are doing.

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teacherwith2kids · 27/10/2012 17:43

At my children's school, I leave my other child outside the room with a book. It's one of those early 20th century school buildings with classrooms all opening from a single central hall, where again the Head rules the roost and looks out for any poor behaviour. Never seen the type of behaviour you are descriubing, tbh - though one great feature is that it runs to timing of military precision, so everyone knows that if you arrive at 5,55 for a 6 pm appointment, you will be seen at 6 and waiting children will never have to wait more than 10 minutes.

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teacherwith2kids · 27/10/2012 17:48

Sorry, me again - as a school, we really encourage both parents to attend, to the point that we often make 2 appointments for separated / divorced parents if the split is sufficiently acrimonious to make it difficult for them to attend together. Or if one parent cannot attend for some reason, we make arrangements for them to come into school and see books etc on a separate night. Both parents SHOULD be involved in their children's education, and we want to make that as easy as possible.

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Tiredmumno1 · 27/10/2012 17:52

At one of my children's school they have a room where the children can play or read with staff supervising, I think it's a great idea.

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akaemmafrost · 27/10/2012 17:59

Our school does a crèche for children and their siblings while parents evening is on.

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alcofrolic · 27/10/2012 18:19

Our school is arranged with mixed year groups in separate units, so children are trailed from one unit to another during the evening.

Does anyone do parent interviews over a day or an afternoon?

teacher how does collecting from a central area work if you have a sibling and the previous teacher overruns?

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Sparklingbroomstick · 27/10/2012 18:24

DSs are older now so can be left but DH and I used to decide who was going on the day. We never both went, it was usually DH as he never usually set foot in the school.

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