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To be annoyed about people telling me my bump is too small for my number of weeks?

(41 Posts)
CalamityJ Sat 27-Oct-12 15:31:59

I would say 90% of people tell me my bump is very small for my weeks (24). Bearing in mind I could barely keep anything down for 4 months it's not surprising I've not put on loads of weight but at the 19 week scan the sonographer said the baby was growing absolutely fine and measuring normally (big relief given the sickness). But now I'm getting worried again because people keep saying my bump is small. Having said that the one person who reassured me was an ex midwife colleague of mine who wanted to guess how far gone I was and from looking guessed one week ahead (guessed 24 weeks at 23 weeks). So why do I get so annoyed at everyone else telling me I'm small?

BadgersBottom Sat 27-Oct-12 15:33:28

I don't know. Why DO you get so annoyed about what is just small talk?

Gimblinginthewabe Sat 27-Oct-12 15:33:58

they are probably trying to make themselves feel better that they got really fat when they were pregnant!

DeepPurple Sat 27-Oct-12 15:34:50

I had the opposite. According to 80% of people I was having twins hmm why people can't keep their opinions to themselves I have no idea.

Gimblinginthewabe Sat 27-Oct-12 15:39:07

Me too! Even the phlebotomist asked if I was having twins! I measured exactly right according to my midwife and ds was 7lbs 14 so not huge.

People just love to make comments.

PrincessPumpkinshoutsBOO Sat 27-Oct-12 15:39:48

I have seen enough threads on here and seen enough friends to know that bumps are all different. Some get bump envy as they don't have big beautiful beach ball bellies, a friend of mine only wore maternity clothes in her last 4 weeks. I am 13 weeks preggo and am already in maternity tops sad but we all had our lovely healthy babies at the end. It is your bump and you really have no say in how it grows, you could try saying that next time 'well it is what it is, it is healthy, and I didn't ask for it to be this size' but I'm quite arsy at the mo

larks35 Sat 27-Oct-12 15:39:59

I was small for both mine. They were quite small babies (7lb 3oz and just 6lb), born just on and just before due date. People commented all the time and then commented on how quickly I lost the baby weight! It didn't bother me at all. The post-birth comments were definitely down to envy, as admitted by them!

Iggly Sat 27-Oct-12 15:40:32

Being pregnant means, sadly, you're open to public scrutiny.

I remember being angry but actually the comments were wearing after a time and I just let them wash over me. As you should.

ditzydrawers Sat 27-Oct-12 15:40:59

I had that all the time and it used to worry and annoy me!

Heartbeep Sat 27-Oct-12 15:43:20

I had this throughout my pregnancy it is VERY annoying but people to mean to be offensive or upset you. For some reason when you're pregnant every person you meet feels they are at liberty to comment on your waistline. Just smile & nod!

FWIW, my bump was measuring small & I delivered early as the scans were showing a small baby. Baby was born at 38 weeks weighing 6lbs 9oz vastly bigger than scans predicted.

Good luck with the rest of the pregnancy!

TwitchyTail Sat 27-Oct-12 15:44:34

They probably think (misguidedly) they're giving you a compliment. My boss, who is a genuinely lovely person, frequently tells me I'm "still tiny" at 5 months. And if I'm totally honest, I'd rather hear that than be told I'm a whale (with the caveat that I know my baby is growing normally on the scans). Although best of all would be if other people just withheld from making any comments about size...

I'd just smile and say "plenty of time for that to change!" or something, and then start talking about the weather.

CalamityJ Sat 27-Oct-12 15:46:56

Glad there's support for me being reasonable to feel annoyed but yes I agree since I've become pregnant I have had to accept public scrutiny of my body. If I'd put on a stone just from eating too many Jaffa Cakes rather than getting pregnant would so many people feel entitled to comment on my weight? This thread was sparked by me popping out of the room during a break in a meeting and when I got back there'd been a straw poll on how far along I was! This was senior managers (men and women including a senior nurse and senior social workers!) They all guessed 4/5 months and were surprised when I said 24 weeks.

NellyBluth Sat 27-Oct-12 15:51:08

Nah, it's annoying. But I bet you next week everyone will be saying that you look bigger than you should, that's what always happens - I got both comments in the same day once! grin

PurplePidjInAPointyHat Sat 27-Oct-12 15:53:36

24 weeks is 4-5 months, isn't it? confused

I'm 35 weeks (8 months) and keep getting "Wow, you're... Neat and tidy!" type comments. Bump measures 35cm, ta very much!

CalamityJ Sat 27-Oct-12 15:57:33

I'd say 24 weeks is 5-6 months myself?

PrincessPumpkinshoutsBOO Sat 27-Oct-12 16:00:11

Well 26 weeks is 6 month's so I would agree 5 1/2 months at 24 weeks.

Aspiemum2 Sat 27-Oct-12 16:04:36

You can't win - when I was pregnant with the twins it would be

"Wow what a big bump, are they sure it's one?"
"No it's twins"
"Oh, it's tiny then"!!!

Fwiw my twins were both the full term size of a single baby when born and my bump was massive - god knows how big people thought it should have been though!!

Don't give it a second thought grin

WorraLiberty Sat 27-Oct-12 16:04:48

I had everyone including some midwives telling me this when I was pregnant with DS1.

I kept pointing out that as I was very slim, small framed and 5ft 3" with (at that time!) extremely tight stomach muscles, it was bound to be a small bump - just like my sisters had small bumps in their pregnancies.

I ended up giving birth vaginally to a 6lb 13oz baby.

And given my size 3 feet, that was more than large enough for me!

MissMyBellyButton Sat 27-Oct-12 16:08:00

I think people are trying to be nice - your bump is neat i.e. you don't look huge . As it happens, I measured very small and was induced at 39 weeks because of bump size measuring 32 weeks. This did not stop half the people I met telling me my bump was huge (could it be twins?) and half telling me I was neat. It's just small talk so you should try not to take it so seriouslysmile.

PrincessPumpkinshoutsBOO Sat 27-Oct-12 16:08:50

Genuine question Worra what has shoe size got to do with baby size? I have size 9 feet, and have had a 7.5 lb baby and a 10.3lb one, currently expecting #3.

Aspiemum2 Sat 27-Oct-12 16:12:36

Maybe she meant in terms of carrying around a bump on size 3 feet? confused

Isandri Sat 27-Oct-12 16:34:48

Everyone is commenting on my small bump too. I'm 38 weeks and it is all out front. Nobody believes I'm that far along and I get concerned looks when I tell them my dates. The thing that really makes me laugh is when people then comment on how it must be a small baby. I'm measuring exactly what I should be and the midwives think the baby will be around 9 pound. Just ignore what everyone says.

sanityawol Sat 27-Oct-12 16:41:26

I had one lunch break where in the space of a 45 minute trip around town I was told that my bump was huge, tiny, high up and low down.

I suppose that people just like to chat, and the bump gives them an 'in' that makes a change from the weather or traffic.

At least second time around I didn't have any random strangers stroking my bump!

neontetra Sat 27-Oct-12 16:43:24

I had this too - it is awful! My dd was born at 38 weeks and only 5lbs 9, so maybe they had a point! But so what - she's just petite, perfectly healthy, I needed no stitches and got my pre-pregnancy body back almost immediately (not that that matters either, but still).

MamaChocoholic Sat 27-Oct-12 16:56:17

I had this too. Ds1, my waters had gone, and the mw was asking me if I was sure I was term. He was 8lb. With the dts loads of people wouldn't believe I was having twins. Not helpful when I was losing weight and worried about their growth, but scans were all good and they were 6lb 5 each at 38 weeks.

Don't listen. If the scan and mw are ok then ignore ignore ignore. Or get used to the idea that everyone will feel even more entitled to comment once your baby is born!

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