To have had enough of London?

[Londonista1975]

Last Saturday the buses were up the spout in central London because of a union demo which caused me a bit of grief. It acted as a kind of catalyst about how I've been feeling about living here...

The dawdling hordes of tourists

Having no friends in my neighbourhood and having to travel miles to see them

Insane rents that are ever increasing

Not having a big amount of disposable income to do as much as I'd want, though I appreciate the fantastic free things here. But I don't always want to do the free stuff

A horrible commute that feels like a twice-daily workout and costs a fortune


I thought 'I can't do this anymore'. It is all too exhausting and I'm thinking I'm not suited to living here anymore. Maybe I never was. I look at friends up north with a seemingly better quality of life and wonder why I've been here for so long. Sometimes I feel utterly broken.

Has anyone else felt the same?

We don't have kids yet, by the way, so a move would be quite practical in some ways. Maybe Bristol or Leeds, but then maybe it's a case of 'green grass'...

[BabiesNeedInstructions]

We moved from London to Bristol this year.
Everything is better here except jobs - if you can find a job then do it. We went from 2 bed flat to 5 bed house and our neighbours came round the first night with home-made cake.
Haven't missed London for a single second so far.

[drjohnsonscat]

You need to name change!

You can have a great life here and you can get excited in a perverse way by the demos happening here because this is where stuff happens! The olympics were here on the one hand and the demos are here on the other iykwim.

But. You have to be up for it. It is hard work and if you don't get a thrill out of it and it's all become a grind then there are lots of fantastic options. Particularly if your job doesn't tie you here.

Personally I would never ever leave. But that's because I still want to cry whenever I see St Paul's and I still get a buzz walking through the City. I even love the big stations and the crowds walking across the bridges in the morning. If those aren't moving you then there are other lovely options.

[RottenLuck]

Of course the grass is always greener. But if you're not living the london life anymore and can earn enough in your chosen field elsewhere then go for it. It involves some sacrifice of some sort, I miss the varied culture and excitement but am part of a lovel community within reach of the excitement and that works for me.

[Backinthebox]

Some people love London. I happen to think it is a pit of misery and awfulness. I've stopped waving carving knives at my husband since I left London, and can't actually remember much of the 2 years I lived there now. I'm so glad I don't live there any longer.

[AdoraBell]

If you moved to the areas you mention would it be easier to see friends and work? Life outside of major cities is much calmer, I was born and raised in London and find it a tad overwhelming when I visit now. Do you think that you would be happiest midway, quiet place to live but shops and activities within easy reach?

Talk it through with your partner and see what you both think. Maybe start lists of pros and cons.

[McHappyPants2012]

in your position, what is keeping you in London

[peasabovesticks]

Correct me if I'm wrong but weren't you on here a few weeks ago slagging off anywhere outside London? If you are the person I'm thinking of your DP is a journalist.
Apologies if I'm wrong.

[TheFarSide]

My life in London improved massively when I found a job local to where I live (a cheap part of London with a community feel) and made friends with colleagues also living locally. Suddenly, it felt like living in a village - local pub, local restaurants, local gym, able to get to these places at a reasonable time as I was no longer commuting into central London, no more travel expenses ... yet still only 30/40 minutes from all the main London sights.

[Londonista1975]

Babies, the warmth of people is what I miss (originally from the midlands).

Drjohnsonscat I do know what you mean about the buzz even after a decade here but I don't feel it as much as you do. You're damn right about London being hard work.

Mchappypants, well, some friends and our work...and.....oh wait, there's nothing else.

[Londonista1975]

Hi Peasabovesticks, no that wasn't me.

[drjohnsonscat]

I don't have a horrible commute. That can take the buzz out of one somewhat! I think that may be the key to the misery.

[McHappyPants2012]

It seems like you have your answer

[LulaPalooza]

YANBU if that's how you feel, really and honestly, but I can't relate to it. I love this City. have lived here for almost 20 years and the only place I would move to is Cape Town, for the sunshine. I feel the same as drjohnsonscat.

[LulaPalooza]

You may be right re commute. I take the tube in the morning, bus home in the evening so I can go over Lambeth Bridge and see the Thames.

There is warmth in London. Or there is where I live... SE London. A place most people think is nasty and stabby.

[Haberdashery]

I don't find it hard work. I'm London born and bred and wouldn't leave unless for actual chateau in France or similar. But I don't think anyone should be living somewhere that feels like hard work. YANBU. If you've had enough it's kind of up to you! Go and find somewhere you like better. It's not compulsory to live in London, you know!

[drjohnsonscat]

at mayhem.

[ceeveebee]

If you're bored of London you're bored of life

I'm originally from up north but when I visit parents etc I am bored within hours. London has such a diverse range of cultural activities, restaurants, theatres, museums etc.

If you think public transport is rubbish in London you would be shocked in Manchester. Horrendously expensive buses, trains that run 3 times an hour and are often cancelled or full on arrival (usually only 2 or 4 carriages) and last train back home at 10.30pm. And you get people talking to you when you're trying to read (in fact if you do read a book on a train in Manchester you get some very funny looks)

Hairdressers and nail bars close on Sundays outside of london - bizarre

I don't think I could ever live in a suburban housing estate with a driveway and having to get in the car just to buy a pint of milk.

And I work in media and DH in banking so we'd struggle to find jobs paying anything like our salaries anywhere else in the UK

I love London

[catchmytrain]

I live in central London and I love it, but many of my friends have left the centre in recent years as they've started families. I can see how hard it is to raise dc here. We only manage really because we're lucky enough to pay council rents, on a zone 1 estate so no long commutes. But the price we pay is that our schools and health services are under a lot of pressure, another reason why so many mc friends have left the locality.

I love the leisure and arts opportunities here and fortunately I am within walking distance of many of them, but I don't think you'd really benefit from them if you live far from the centre. I think the suburbs (zone 3/4) are probably the worst bits to be in, as they lack the diversity/opportunities of the centre of town but housing is still expensive and you still have to pay a lot to commute. I used to live in a suburb of a more provincial city and it was fine, people were less dynamic but costs were definitely lower and I was certainly less busy as there was less to see and do.

[janelikesjam]

Trying to travel in London at the w/e is nearly always a nightmare. Poor transport directions, parts of rail lines and tube lines regularly and arbitrarily closed for "maintenance", various demonstrations and other traffic issues, blah blah.

YANBU.

Interestingly, on my thread on same subject earlier this year, I think I mention feeling "broken" by living in London ,so I think I know where you are coming from. I don't think the rest of the UK is a picnic by comparison, but if you take a look around you may find with luck somewhere that makes you feel happier.

[Londonista1975]

Adora, I'm from a city and can't imagine ever not living one and living in one of those cities would be easy to see friends there and nearby. But we need to look at work opportunities.

You're right that we need to talk.

[Londonista1975]

Thanks Janelikesjam, I'll have a look at that thread tomorrow night!

[WelshMaenad]

Can I even though I'm completely biased recommend Cardiff as a LOVELY place to live and work?

I honestly would not live in London if you paid he, I appreciate its fabulous for some people, but not for me. I bloody love South Wales. Cardiff us a fantastic yet compact city, you have the Bay area, lovely coastline within easy reach, ditto mountains, ditto beautiful countryside.

I guess it depends on what you do as yo whether you could find work here, but I would never willingly leave.

[Inneedofbrandy]

I love London and vist a few times a year. I live in Bristol and Bristols great, theres lots of culture and shops (that open on sundays) bars cafes gallerys museums but without that London buzz. It is a slower pace and people are so much more friendlier (the random convos with strangers). If your going to take the plunge and move down I would suggest close to the centre so you don't feel in suberbia. We have busses that run all night to!

[wheresmespecs]

OP, you sound like me ten years ago. I spent 12 years in London - nice while it lasted, but the sheer effort of getting around, esp at the weekend, plus the grim commute and the fact that the cost of living was so expensive just wore me down.

I moved to Cardiff and started a family. Cardiff is fantastic if you have kids - easy to get around, tons to do, bloody great park in the middle of town, and beaches half an hour drive away. Affordable houses (compared to much of the south east, at least) - galleries, a big museum, a few theatres.... and they even built a John Lewis for me.

Depends what you want out of a city and a life.