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to want to gouge my eyeballs out/pull my ears off when I see/hear this statement?

(32 Posts)
beetrootface Thu 25-Oct-12 00:46:09

Increasingly, both in RL and on the internet, I have seen the statement 'mum always knows best' when it comes to parenting. Does anyone here really believe in this statement? Does mum always know whats best for her child?

AIBU to be really angered when someone is basically justifying potentially dangerous/harmful parenting methods by using this sort of clap trap?

I feel really angry tonight after reading on another forum about a woman who has a very very young baby (11 weeks) who is waking constantly through the night crying and she won't feed him, she just sticks a dummy in his mouth but he spits it out and starts crying again. The majority of posters are telling her just to give him a feed so they can both get some sleep, but these posters are being slated and she is gripping on to the posters who are telling her she obviously knows best because she gave birth to him.

MurderOfGoths Thu 25-Oct-12 00:49:32

It is ridiculous.

a) because it doesn't take into account how many utter fuckwits there are out there
b) it presumes that only people with common sense are able to get pregnant
c) it ignores the other parent entirely

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Thu 25-Oct-12 00:51:23

I've been in this mum business 3 year now and I must say the mum knows best shit is utter bollocks. I'm live proofgrin

PandaSpaniel Thu 25-Oct-12 00:52:42

Good god, he is 11 weeks, of course he is bloody hungry! In this case You ANBU.

beetrootface Thu 25-Oct-12 00:53:57

Oh tell me about it! A few weeks ago my drama llama daughter came home from school complaining of a sore wrist DEMANDING to be taken to hospital. Looked fine to me. Listened to her whine on for ages then gave in. I even told the doctor she was a bit of a drama llama and he nodded and we both chuckled a bit.

It turned out it was bloody broken! I still feel terrible! sad

bringupthebabies Thu 25-Oct-12 00:54:51

But as opposed to whom? Medical professionals, the State, Mumsnet Rules?

I always read 'mum knows best' as a shorthand for mums (or dads) know their child the best because they are with them all the time and therefore pick up on all their little signals and know how to read them better than anyone else.

BeingBooyhoo Thu 25-Oct-12 00:55:31

it's a loada shite.

women don't suddenly become super intelligent all knowing beings when they become parents.

bringupthebabies Thu 25-Oct-12 00:57:06

Beetroot I did something similar - turned out mine had pneumonia not was whinging because he hadn't like the tea I's cooked! blush

beetrootface Thu 25-Oct-12 00:59:09

Oh Bringup, is he ok now?

PandaSpaniel Thu 25-Oct-12 01:03:02

bringupthebabies, yes us mums (and dads) do spend the most time with our children but obviously we don't always know best and are not afraid to admit it ^^ I always send my lil un to school despite him saying he is ill (he is ALWAYS ill on a Monday lol) but had to admit defeat when he threw up on the way to school once.

bringupthebabies Thu 25-Oct-12 01:05:44

Yes thanks, it was a few years ago now. He really enjoys reminding me 'of that time you said there was nothing wrong with me and made me eat my tea when I was ill and had to go to hospital. Can I have some...?' grin

Hope your DDs wrist is healing well.

beetrootface Thu 25-Oct-12 01:08:48

Oh shes fine now, she milked it for all its worth! Although she does throw it back in my face now and again "you didn't believe me, call yourself a mother!"

PandaSpaniel Thu 25-Oct-12 01:13:17

Lol at the above. Serves ya right you unfit mothers! grin

PandaSpaniel Thu 25-Oct-12 01:18:10

Not laughing at the children being ill, just that they are milking it, just to be clear.

PandaSpaniel Thu 25-Oct-12 01:18:52

Think I should go to bed...

humblebumble Thu 25-Oct-12 02:22:42


redexpat Thu 25-Oct-12 07:48:17

YANBU! If that were true then supernanny wouldn't be on our tv screens. And my schoolteacher friends will tell you that some parents do not know their little darlings are actually little devils!

sashh Thu 25-Oct-12 08:01:03

mum always knows best

Tell that to Baby P

MrsDeVere Thu 25-Oct-12 08:04:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Everlong Thu 25-Oct-12 08:10:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PoppadomPreach Thu 25-Oct-12 08:11:56

Goes hand in hand with "happy mummy, happy baby". Both utter shite.

RikersBeard Thu 25-Oct-12 08:13:08


About as logical as happy mommy = happy baby

Used to justify whatever course of action "mommy" would like to pursue, whether it's in the baby's best interests or not

Byecklove Thu 25-Oct-12 08:13:13

My mum didn't believe that I'd broken my foot - she did when the teachers called her and told her to come and get me! I don't hold it against her, honest.

I agree, 'tis never an excuse for bad parenting but I think there is a grain of truth to it. NOBODY believed me when I said there was something wrong with DS2. I knew something wasnt right so persevered and eventually (far too late, poor thing had been in pain for months) a lovely Dr ran some tests (foreign country) and he was diagnosed with severe silent reflux. So I think healthcare professionals, teachers etc should listen if a parent tells them something's up but perhaps not take it as gospel.

beetrootface Thu 25-Oct-12 08:40:03

I think what you're describing there is instinct Byeecklove rather than the happy mummy happy baby nonsense.

I don't know why I went back to see more responses on the womans thread, I want to gouge my eyes out even more this morning.

mutny Thu 25-Oct-12 08:44:20

I remember a woman on bounty telling a rather emotional young mum to wean at 8 weeks to get the baby to sleep. Same poster also said their hv had advocated giving newborns whisky (this advice was given within the last year) and that the OP should do as she wants as 'mummy knows bets'.
Tbh that poster went on to tell people that only children who were vaccinated could attend school. confused

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