the use of sexual language by teachers

[barcappen]

My 7 year old daughter has recently started Stagecoach drama,singing and dance classes. 3 weeks ago she started holding her crotch and dancing whilst singing " I'm sexy and I know it ". She told me that this was played every week at her stagecoach dance class. I was shocked and complained to the principle that I considered this inappropiate . She said that they were having difficulty finding suitable music but I disagreed and said there were hundreds of funky dance tracks. The class is for 6 - 8 year olds. Anyway, she said she would deal with it and it is no longer played. But now just 2 weeks later they are learning a new song. It contains the word "sexy " in it. The words were printed out and given to the children - they started nudging each other because they are taught at school that sexy is a "swear " word. Some children put their hands up to tell the teacher but all she said was " put your hands down ". I just think it's unecessary and inappropiate for this age group. Am I being unreasonable ? Would love to hear your views !

[LineRunner]

Why are you sending your daughter to this class? You really don't have to. You don't like it; it makes you - and your daughter - feel uncomfortable. I'd bin it.

[MamaBear17]

I don't think you are being unreasonable. I once went to a school concert where a group of 10 year old girls sang a Lady Gaga track and the lyrics (amongst others) were:
"I want your drama, the touch of your hand
I want your leather studded kiss in the sand"
My hubby is the type of bloke who is very difficult to shock but even he thought it was a poor song choice for little girls singing in a choir. I think I am a little old fashioned, but I am also a HOY in a middle school and I see the damage that can be done when kids are exposed to 'sexy' far too early.

[Inneedofbrandy]

I wouldn't have a problem with this, my ds regularly sings I'm sexy and I know it and I really want to show it. My dd loves rhianna and sings along to words worse then sexy. Oh there 5 and 7. There's even baby tshirts saying I'm sexy or sexy lil man ( I would never put that on my dc ever ) so I doubt they thought the word sexy was that bad. You are being precious.

[spg1983]

I think YANBU. There is music out there which is appropriate - think "Superstar" by Jamelia and similar. I used to be a dance teacher and had to go through the same child protection training and checking as a high school teacher (which is what I do now). Using that music is something I wouldn't expect a local teacher who is just starting out to do, let alone a national company like Stagecoach. Maybe you could try taking your complaint higher? I'm sure that at the very least they'll have an experienced teacher somewhere within their company who can advise your dc's teacher about tracks which are age-appropriate.

[BumpingFuglies]

It's popular music, they are all doing it. It's us that are uncomfortable with it, not them. I was pretty when I first saw DS2 at it - he's 7. But it's harmless. They are not making associations at that age. It's the age old find a word and laugh. Explain it your way and then just leave it. Don't stop their fun.

[FourEyesGhoul]

YANBU to think the use of the word "sexy" by and for children is unpleasant, but YABU to keep sending your child to a class which uses methods of which you don't approve.

[Inneedofbrandy]

I remember being in primary school singing it's just a little crush, barbour girl and britney hit me baby one more time. There will always be sexy in pop music unless you expect them to sing church hums or abc.

[Softlysoftly]

This is why although DD1 lobed dance I'm going to have to enrol her in ballet even though there is no way she's going to be a fairy like ballerina because street dance/pop etc seem to lead to fake tanned, fake haired, fake nailed nastiness with mindless schlep wannabe song choices.

[lovebunny]

your thread title is misleading.

you send your daughter to whore-class. you probably didn't intend to - did you watch a class before you sent her along? the things that go on in dance classes are disgusting to any reasonable adult. but mums love it, they'll be along to call me everything under the sun any time now.

so-called dance has been revolting for years - i suppose i'd have been looking at classes with my daughter round about 1987 and it was well established then. its ok if you're preparing for a life in the sex industry.

sack dance, until you find a respectable class (don't hold your breath). but i would complain to the school about telling children that 'sexy' is a 'swear word'. it isn't. its inappropriate but it isn't swearing. why mislead people?

[Inneedofbrandy]

Argh barbie not barbour ffs iPods

[solidgoldbrass]

Never mind. Teach them a few South Park singalongs instead. How about "Shut your fucking face uncle-fucker" for starters?

[KeithLeMonde]

I'm super, thanks for asking....

Our kids do a dance thing every morning at school and they seem to have found lots of good, popular, high energy songs that don't include sexual lyrics. I might be a bit of a pearl-clutcher on this one but I wouldn't want my kids singing songs about sexiness at 7.

[BumpingFuglies]

lovebunny - whore-class? Really? That's a bit strong

[Softlysoftly]

inneedof your argument is your DCs sing worse words along to Rhianna who, however good she is, is not appropriate in dress or lyrics for children .

Do we really think this shit isn't doing any harm? When a lot of the next generation aspire to mediocre stardom via getting being pretty and wearing tight clothes?

[Dominodonkey]

I think YAB a little bit U. They are not actually teachers, they are there to teach dancing and singing and for the kids to have a great time. They are doing that. The word 'sexy' is definitely not a swear word and I think that is a ridiculous thing for teachers to tell them.

Having said that I do think there are limits. I used to work on holiday camps and asked one of my colleagues to turn a record off as it was George Michael and he was singing 'I'll be your sexual freak" repeatedly. She could not see a problem.

[Inneedofbrandy]

No my point is children don't know what there singing and so don't attach meanings to words like adults do. I used rhianna as an example there is more but there will always be the next rhianna, like there wa a britney or billie piper when I was younger, or take that rolling around in jelly. I think it's more discerting to attach any sexual behaviour or meaning to a child singing a song with the word sexy in.

[echt]

Misleading thread title. They're not teachers.

[scentednappyhag]

lovebunny, your posts never fail to make me feel ...

[WilsonFrickett]

So leave the class. Just leave. It's not compulsory. And they're not teachers, either.

[Softlysoftly]

Ok that's clearer, i still think however that installing it so young (the acceptableness of sexual language and dance, in a way that says sex sells) leads to issues. If I say to DD2 "no not kind" and move her hand it means nothing (5mnths) but give it 12 months and those words have meaning, that action is ingrained and it becomes part of her psyche.

[Dominodonkey]

"the things that go on in dance classes are disgusting to any reasonable adult"

It's just dancing and calling it 'whore class' is unreasonable.

Agree on the 'sexy' as a swear word though.

[catgirl1976]

Whore class?

Cripes lovebunny......................... whore class?

OP YANBU - I think there is plenty of other music they could have chosen

[lovebunny]

lovebunny - whore-class? Really? That's a bit strong

well, no. i found it so shocking that i'm still astounded by it, 25 years later. and i really cannot imagine why any mother would want her toddler or young daughter gyrating her hips and grabbing her private parts (that's not aimed at the o p, it's what they were up to at the class i saw). there isn't a decent, respectable place for that behaviour, so why teach it?

[Dominodonkey]

love bunny You do understand that the one class you saw 25 years ago may not be representative of the thousands of other dance classes up and down the country don't you?

[catgirl1976]

Where was this whore class 25 years ago lovebunny?

What were they gyrating to? Rick Astley?