DBro is getting married next year, I am really happy and can't wait.
Future SIL texted me the other day to ask when I am going around to pick up my invite and the rest of my family (this is not further to any conversation we have had, but I am not going there with that). I asked who she had invites for as I don't see that much of some of my family. I gave her my dads address to post it as I don't see him that often, plus I will be the one who has to chase up "btw I still have your invite here can you pick it up" then it will be up to me to take everyone elses around or pay out to post them. I said I would leave the rest with my nan who sees various family at different times, far more than me.
Now she has day invites for my family (DH and kids), sister, dad and GPs. Evening invites for an aunt, 2 cousins and their spouses and another 2 cousins who have DPs (one only very recent) but are invited as single people. There is an aunt and cousin who don't live nearby like the others, my DB doesn't have a relationship with them so they aren't invited. I have no issue. The numbers are limited and as the brides GPs are paying for the reception, the bride and groom don't feel they can say "we want to invite more, can you pay more money" and they can't afford it themselves, plus they want to invite their actual friends in the evening. The ceremony is in a very small place and it is close family and a few friends only, the reception is bigger but numbers are still limited.
I was telling my nan about the invites last night and she immediately said "what about x" (aunt and cousin not invited). I explained the above to her. In general we are not a close family and I don't see the problem but I know she isn't happy about it and was saying about x talking about coming down for the wedding (she is assuming she is invited). I also don't know what the other cousins and aunt are going to say about not being invited all day when my DBro was to theirs then the other 2 about not having their DPs invited. I understand about numbers, it was an issue at my wedding and it split my family. Weddings really bring out the worst in my family and it does my head in.
I know I am going to end up in the middle with people asking me why this and why that. Why can't people just accept an invite and not question the bride and grooms guest list!!! It isn't up to anyone else, its not like we are all close and see each other regularly. Christmas is usually the only time we all see each other up my nans house (and this doesn't include the aunt and cousin not invited, she only comes down here once every few years then she doesn't see my brother anyway) and I know that from this year that is changing due to family moving away etc.
AIBU to think that it shouldn't matter who the bride and groom want to celebrate their big day with and people should just be happy for them?!
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AIBU?
Why do people have opinions on wedding guest lists, why can't they just be happy for bride and groom!!!!! AIBU?
47 replies
CrapBag · 22/10/2012 10:05
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