To think that I will not psychologically damage

[SecretCermonials]

My DCat by saying " no my fatty you have had your dinner" any more than I will give him species confusion when i pronounce he is "mummys cleverest beast" or make him join the SAS by telling him he is the "best furry bringer of mouse death in the world"
DP is concerned over the possible damage i am inflicting on his self esteem and delicate feline psyche
Disclaimer light hearted

[BalthierBunansa]

I don't know, I regularly called my cat 'fatty' but found out later he started skipping his meals and playing with his cat toys excessively. I would be careful if I was you!

[waterlego6064]

We say terrible things about, and to, our cats. It's a sort of very dark humour but I dread to think what others might think about it if they heard us.

[SecretCermonials]

Oh no balt am I on a slippery slope? I tell him he is a gorgeous beefcake too does that balance it? Ive even called him hench (i think that means fit but in reality I heard it on tv) maybe I should give him some kitty treats to rectify the damage?!

[mrsbugsywugsy]

Last time I told my cat she was fat she vomited her dinner up all over my best rug.

[SecretCermonials]

water when our cat 'speaks' he always has a very camp stewie like accent and says very naughty things

[pjmama]

I have spent years telling my cat she's a big fat pain in the arse and it's about time she popped off and stopped shredding my furniture. She still follows me around purring, I really don't think they give a toss what we think of them.

[SecretCermonials]

Ah mrs nooo this would be my comeuppance... And... SIOB he knows which rug I love the most!!

runs off to check rug

[MrsEddChina]

Our cats get threatened to be sent outside to the wolves when they annoy us, and one is affectionately known as fat cat every now and again!

Ps. Just to point out, there are no wolves near our house that we know of!

[MrsEddChina]

And the fat cat really is just big boned possibly

[SecretCermonials]

Hehe mrsEdd mine gets called MiniBOB when he is norrrty as in "I cast you out you miniature beast of burden" he tends to just chew his bum in reaction though

Mine really is a big boy fat dockyard cat he has to have dog sized flea stuff

[flippinada]

Haha op, I call mine the furry stink beast and lord high fuzz-butt.

He's probably plotting unspeakable tortures to inflict on me as we speak....

[BalthierBunansa]

Secret Hmmm I think you may be sending your cat mixed messages. I would increase the compliments, but don't be surprised if he ends up sitting in front of the mirror all day preening!

[SecretCermonials]

I think perhaps I should love bomb him so he doesnt desire to eat his feelings?

I havent been gift a dead or if im VERY luck still alive!! mouse in over a week... He is obviously making his stand

[BalthierBunansa]

Personally Secret, I think maybe eating the small animals food he's fetched you might show him how much you care and how highly you think of his hunting. You might want to try that?

[ScarahStratton]

I don't think FailCat's damaged for life, even though he's usually called 'Fail' rather than Desmond, which is his real name. Although he's quite possibly too thick to even notice.

[Hassled]

I call PsychoCat "Little Fucker" on a regular basis and sadly there is no obvious impact on his self-esteem.

[SecretCermonials]

balt I would of course, but cant find the correct recipe for the sanitary prep of such, as Im hugely pregnant, but I will make sure I tell DP he simply MUST do this to save poor wideboy boy cats feelings!!

Desmond is literally the best cat name, ever!

[SecretCermonials]

Hassled perhaps he likes the imagery? Perhaps in the cat world he is something of a lathario, and sports it like an ironic nickname?

[flippinada]

Desmond the cat....

I like it.

[5ThingsUnderTheBed]

We have two cats. DH calls one of them the most handsome cat in the world, but only when the other one is not in earshot as he doesn't want to hurt its feelings

[Hassled]

Perhaps. I think he's just a psycho fucker, though. I've had many cats over the years, and this is the only one I'm struggling to like. You know with some people you eventually just have to conclude they're not very nice? I think I'm at that stage with PsychoCat.

[SecretCermonials]

hassled I think thats entirely possible!

5 that sounds like DP his rationale for just the one cat is that he can legitimately claim favourite

flippin stratters has mortimer (i think) too truly queen of great names!

[flippinada]

Mortimer and Desmond are awesome cat names.

Mine is called Spike, because he's large and very fluffy.

[SecretCermonials]

flippin i think mortimer is actually a crow or raven.. Literally pet top trumps haha!

[Schrodingershamster]

I tell my friends cat she is lovely and soft and one day she is going to make me a nice fur scarf