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(28 Posts)
cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:21:02

Title thread says it all really.

I'm a teacher and I hate it. I used to really love it. I've had a baby and now I've gone back to work I really don't enjoy it. It's not like I want to be at home with baby either I just don't want to do my job.

DH said only really lucky people enjoy their jobs and I should be lucky that I have a job at all.

I'm well paid and only have to work 3 days

I know I just have to suck it up and do it. I don't know what I'd rather do. Feel a bit depressed I think at the moment, lack energy and motivation.

I feel like I'm letting the kids, the school and myself down. I'd rather spend the day in bed

Yama Mon 15-Oct-12 19:22:53

I think you may be more than a bit depressed. Perhaps go and talk to GP.

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:26:26

Seeing a GP on Thursday.

I've been being sick and not feeling very well

SoleSource Mon 15-Oct-12 19:30:50

Maybe call in sick until GP appt x

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:33:25

I spoke to head teacher today and I said I would come in (regretting it now!)

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:35:32

I feel so tired and not mentally strong enough to work

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:43:22

sad

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:44:48

sadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsadsad

HuggleBuggleBear Mon 15-Oct-12 19:50:58

Do you think you would feel like this about your job if you wasn't depressed?
Which is the main problem the depression or the job? If you just changed jobs but didn't tackle the depression the problem might follow you into your next job.
It's hard returning to work after maternity leave I think you need to give yourself time to adjust.

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 19:52:42

How long should I wait? I'm not being sarcastic seriously

I want things to be easier, I'm tired! I don't know if its because I'm ill

HuggleBuggleBear Mon 15-Oct-12 19:54:00

How long have you been back at work?

Loveweekends10 Mon 15-Oct-12 19:54:01

Don't do anything hasty about the job. Sort your post baby depression first because its clouding your view of your job. See your gp and maybe take more time off.

BatmanLovesHowlingAtTheMoon Mon 15-Oct-12 19:57:34

Get yourself signed off. Nobody will thank you for going in whan you are not well. Teaching when depressed is just impossible, as for 6 hours a day you are constantly 'performing'.

Think about what aspect of the job you are hating - the children? Planning? The staff? Paperwork? Dealing with parents? Marking? Pressure to get the class 2 or 3 sublevels ahead? A combination?

Think about if it is your school, or if you would be better off elsewhere.

I think if you have a good think, and maybe start afresh after half term, you might be able to identify what you want. Most of all - look after yourself. Put yourself first for a while.

SoleSource Mon 15-Oct-12 19:57:39

You haven't been well, ypu have a baby, that in itself messed me up and I have no mental illness. You are adjusting to worklife. You have had therapy and are adjusting to that. You need time to feel well and OK about you.
Home tutoring?

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 20:00:00

I've been back since sept.

I feel like I'm letting the kids down. I don't think I'm doing an awful job but I'm not on top of my game

BatmanLovesHowlingAtTheMoon Mon 15-Oct-12 20:04:38

Honestly, get signed off and don't feel bad about it. You need to look after yourself. I learnt this the hard way - I changed schools in the end (because that was what was right for me), but was signed off for three months due to the stress of it all. I wish I'd listened to what my body / mind was telling me when I first started feeling depressed.

You've identified you are feeling low, so you need to be able to work on it. You're not alone smile

Titchyboomboom Mon 15-Oct-12 20:07:26

I childmind and looked after a little girl whos mum was a teacher who had gone back to work and she felt exactly the same as you. She was signed off sick and took 6 months of and then went back. Teaching for her was hard to do when she was depressed - it is so mentally taxing and you need to give so much. A GP visit is needed and don't be afraid to take the time you need

ItsMeYourCathy Mon 15-Oct-12 20:10:11

I could've written this op myself. Exactly the same feelings. I'm going to try to change schools. I hate it so much. I catch myself fantasising about being ill and hospitalised to get away from the place and clearly this is a sign that all is not well sad

Runningblue Mon 15-Oct-12 20:28:55

Agree with all the posts above re getting to gp and sign off. And, any kind of counselling so you have a neutral ear to help clarify your thoughts might be worth looking at?

Euphemia Mon 15-Oct-12 20:31:20

Get signed off: give a supply teacher some work. wink

Seriously, the job takes it out of you when you are in full health - stop now before it gets worse.

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 20:32:41

What does being signed off involve?

DD goes to childminder 3days a week. I need the money that having a job involves

JamesBexleySpeed Mon 15-Oct-12 20:34:11

Cheeky, I think you are missing a lot of back story here that you have talked about extensively on your other threads.

I don't think it's just about not enjoying your job at the moment.

whois Mon 15-Oct-12 20:34:31

Your DH is right. Most people don't love their job and you would be a fool to resign.

If your mental health is poor again, then you need to get to yor GP and have some time off. And some treatment.

cheekypickle Mon 15-Oct-12 20:36:06

Mentally I don't feel too bad. I just don't enjoy the job! I generally feel upbeat, enjoy my little girl , love my husband, love home life

INeedThatForkOff Mon 15-Oct-12 20:45:09

You say you're not on top of your game and you feel that you're letting the kids down - I have to say that I suspect this is very common to PT teachers who have very young children at home. I'm guessing that pre-parenthood you put everything into it and just became used to the all-consuming nature of the job. It takes a very committed teacher to sustain that afterwards (and personally, I feel that it would be at the expense of the family).

I have spent the last couple of years feeling this way. I'm about to have another baby, and I know that when I return to work I'll feel even more inferior than ever. The 'invisibility' of the PT-er also gets me down. However, at some point I know the balance will change and I'll be able to put more and more into the job again as my DCs get older. That's what keeps me teaching - I know it's not ideal but I think it's entirely natural.

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