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Not to want to see charity collectors in my supermarket every weekend?

(33 Posts)
Flossyfloof Sun 14-Oct-12 14:56:08

Yet again when I nipped to my local supermarket earlier to get just a couple of bits I was embarrassed to see some people collecting for charity. Someone else was there yesterday. I gave yesterday and didn't want to give today (a different charity). They seem to have someone right in the doorway every weekend and it is impossible to avoid them, either going in or coming out. I do give to charity but when for whatever reason I am not going to it makes me feel very mean and embarrassed.
I know that if they didn't stand there people probably wouldn't give and I do appreciate them giving up their time - but I don't like being made to feel uncomfortable. AIBU?

FamiliesShareGerms Sun 14-Oct-12 14:59:31


Flossyfloof Sun 14-Oct-12 15:00:31

OK then!

Trills Sun 14-Oct-12 15:00:40

If they are making you uncomfortable or harassing you than YWNBU to complain to the supermarket.

If you just feel uncomfortable because of their presence then that's your problem, not theirs.

Flossyfloof Sun 14-Oct-12 15:02:01

It is me feeling uncomfortable mostly but some of them actually ask for donations. That makes me feel baaaaaad.

Trills Sun 14-Oct-12 15:03:44

"Sorry no, I do my charity giving online so I can Gift Aid it"

"Sorry, no, I have my charity giving sorted thanks"

"No, sorry."

"Not today"

(Clearly I'm very English, I feel like I have to say sorry)

Mrsjay Sun 14-Oct-12 15:04:48

well you could either put a few pence in their tin or not If you feel bad then that isn't there fault how else are charities supposed to get money, but TBH the collectors wouldn't damn you to hell if you don't put money in the tin ,

Mrsjay Sun 14-Oct-12 15:05:12


germyrabbit Sun 14-Oct-12 15:05:18


Orangelephantshavewrinkles Sun 14-Oct-12 15:05:59

They are not allowed to ask you to give or indeed jangle the tin. Your op is a little harsh though and I would say YABU.

Mrsjay Sun 14-Oct-12 15:07:28

They are not making you feel uncomfortable you are making you feel uncomfortable,

Trills Sun 14-Oct-12 15:08:31

Charity collectors do expect that many people will not give anything as they walk past. They will not be shocked or upset or angry that you don't wish to give.

SilkandSteel Sun 14-Oct-12 15:08:34

They are not actually allowed to ask directly, or even shake a tin! I agree, it gets a bit much particularly (not necessarily everywhere) when there is a charity collector, then an AA/RAC stand, then inside the store someone accosts you to talk about energy suppliers. It does get a bit wearing saying no time and time again.

Acumens100 Sun 14-Oct-12 15:12:31

I was accosted in a Sainsburys once by someone demanding money for some carers charity. She really tried to shame me. I wish I had said to her that I am a carer and I've never seen a penny or a minute of support from any bloody charity in my whole life! But I didn't. I just never went in that Sainsburys again. That's the answer, I guess. Just don't shop there.

KatyPeril Sun 14-Oct-12 15:13:58

I'd rather they do this than start knocking on my front door!

Hopeforever Sun 14-Oct-12 15:14:16

The easiest thing to do is look directly at them and smile. You are acknowledging they are human and there, but not needing to give them anything or explain why you are not giving.

McHappyPants2012 Sun 14-Oct-12 15:17:54

I don't mind cash collectors, what I hate is bag packers. Leave my shopping alone I have a little system smile


Its not your supermarket. And feeling embarrassed is your issue not theirs.

I dont like them either. But I get over it.

MrsRobertDuvallHasRosacea Sun 14-Oct-12 15:19:29

I give to some and not others.
And politely say, I have no change or not today thankou.

I will be selling poppies soon, and will hearing"oh my poppy is on my other coat" a lot. smile

Trills Sun 14-Oct-12 15:20:38

Last year I didn't walk past a single poppy-selling person.

I don't know how, or why, but at no point did one cross my path.

Flossyfloof Sun 14-Oct-12 15:22:45

I usually organise poppies at my work. A neighbour does them as well. It is probably the only thing I would give to at the door.

MrsRobertDuvallHasRosacea Sun 14-Oct-12 15:25:32

Sadly Trills there aren't enough people volunteering.
All the stalwarts are basically dyingsad or too old to stand outside in November.

I would never give to charity at the door.

ZZZenAgain Sun 14-Oct-12 15:26:25


ilovesooty Sun 14-Oct-12 15:30:13

As long as they're not harassing you I agree with those who say your feelings are your own responsibility.

JenFrankenstein Sun 14-Oct-12 18:09:12

I hope it wasn't us as we were bag packing today. We always tell our girls to ask politely if you want help with packing and if they are not needed to stand well back out the way and always say thank you. We also remind them all heavy items on the bottom, frozen stuff together etc at the start.

Younger girls are usually in pairs or will have a leader very close by to supervise. We try to keep an eye on all the girls as much as possible without hovering over them constantly. We try not to make anyone feel uncomfortable and if any of the girls are mucking around we will pull them off the till. If someone was to accept packing help and then not give any money we do not think any less of them. It is purely voluntary to give a donation and we do remind the girls of this.

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