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AIBU?

to think you shouldn't ask for an 'honest opinion' if you're going to get shirty when you're given it

31 replies

freddiefrog · 13/10/2012 18:38

DH has taken up painting. He's always been arty but has gone into it more seriously now.

He's been doing some painting today and asked for my 'honest opinion' as he felt something wasn't quite right but couldn't put his finger on it

Now, I'm no art critic, but I told him that I thought it was really good but i thought a couple of things were a little out of proportion to each other, hence why it didn't look quite right.

He's now sulking.

Why bloody ask?

Grrrrrr

OP posts:
CrikeyOHare · 13/10/2012 18:43
Grin
mutny · 13/10/2012 18:46

Yanbu. I hate when people do that.

Clearly they don't want honest opinions, they want you to lie so they can convince themselves later that you 'honestly like it'. Its bollocks.
it sounds like you said it in a nice way, so tell him to get his head put of his arse and not ask in future. :)

IllageVidiot · 13/10/2012 18:48

Oh god, yes.

Because 'it's just wonderful darling - you are the artiest, most genius like, devastatingly handsome, bedroom demon to ever wield a paintbrush' was what was echoing in his head but sadly he actually got honesty.

Tough - that goes for all blatant compliment fishers - you get what you deserve, stop it.

ikigai · 13/10/2012 18:53

I do this Grin. In my defence my family are the type to come up with an exhaustive, itemised list, often returning days later to mention something else they've 'just thought of'.

But I love constructive criticism at work - if someone compliments my work without following it up with 'but...' i feel cheated Hmm

Nubbler · 13/10/2012 19:08

Yeah but it might be this is the one problem he finds hard to remedy, having tried. Proportions are difficult. People rarely want full and frank feedback, rather a vague suggestion of an area that needs more work. I say this as a perfectionist when it comes to criticising others but who prefers tact when my stuff get commented on. Irritating I know ...

nkf · 13/10/2012 19:13

It's a misunderstanding. He asked for your "honest opinion." You thought he meant to tell him honestly what you thought. What he meant was you should say something like, "Honestly, that picture is just amazing. So amazing it makes me want to tear off all my clothes right now and then give you the blow job of your life." See. Simple misunderstanding.

freddiefrog · 13/10/2012 19:16

NFK Grin

My mistake. I shall remember next time!

OP posts:
YouSmegHead · 13/10/2012 19:25

Introduce him to aibu and you'll look like his number one fan Grin

squoosh · 13/10/2012 19:28

Well he can't be an artist without an artistic arsiness temperament.

FredFredGeorge · 13/10/2012 19:31

Was the banana much bigger than the plums in the still life? I think men make that mistake a lot?

freddiefrog · 13/10/2012 19:51

LOL! Grin

OP posts:
cuttingpicassostoenails · 13/10/2012 19:55

Oh dear, he's one of those hobby painters who need to have their egos stroked. If he was serious about his art he would not ask for feedback unless he respected the opinion of the person he was asking and was willing to take on board their comments.

If he cannot take criticism he should not ask for it. As a serious artist he would have to learn to politely ignore comments from anyone whose opinion he does not respect.

A fragile ego in anyone who wants to be an artist is a recipe for unhappiness.

CrapBag · 13/10/2012 20:02

YANBU. I give honest opinions if asked. If you don't want the truth then don't bloody ask. If you want a lie, go to someone else.

MummytoKatie · 13/10/2012 22:27

If someone asks for your honest opinion then they really mean they want you to lie convincingly.

freddiefrog · 13/10/2012 22:30

I wouldn't mind, but he said himself something was a bit off.

I can't be too nice about it, he might want to hang it up in the living room Smile

OP posts:
cheekydevil · 13/10/2012 22:32

Sounds a bit like AIBU

fairyfriend · 13/10/2012 22:32

Cuttingpicassostoenails- now you sound pompous. The OP's DH sounds like a nice guy!

ivykaty44 · 13/10/2012 22:34

an aged aunt used to paint - really only because my grandmother did and painted well - she painted a beautiful owl, but it was twice as big as the tree it was sitting in Smile

YouMayLogOut · 13/10/2012 22:36

YANBU

freddiefrog · 13/10/2012 22:38

Ivykaty Smile

This is a landscape - sea, fishing boat and a lighthouse, except the fishing boat is bigger than the lighthouse. The appearance depthwise isn't quite right if you see what I mean

It is really good though

OP posts:
ivykaty44 · 13/10/2012 22:41

He needs to get some perspective on this Wink

freddiefrog · 13/10/2012 22:43

Grin!!!

OP posts:

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Nagoo · 13/10/2012 22:46

ivykaty Grin

cheekydevil · 14/10/2012 05:49

Perhaps it was a cruise ship?

Proudnscary · 14/10/2012 07:47

Eww I do hate a sulker. Draw a stick man doing a wee from the boat and then LTB*

*Leave The Botticelli? Bacon?

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