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to feel like a really crappy mum?

(15 Posts)
ditsydoll Sat 13-Oct-12 16:51:47

My DD is 3 1/2 and I'm about 8-9 weeks pregnant.

I spend most of my day with my head in the toilet vomiting and the rest of it completely exhausted and find the most simple of tasks really hard at the minute. Poor DD has spent far too much time infront of the tv and tonight all I could stomach was to do spaghetti hoops on toast for tea when normally she's fed really well.

DH works 7 days a week and funny hours so I'm on my own most of the time. I just feel like all poor DD ever sees me do is throw up and look utterly miserable at the minute. Feeling so awful and crappy. Hoping the morning sickness leaves ne soon as I couldn't cope with 8 months of sickness like last time sad

Catsdontcare Sat 13-Oct-12 16:55:41

Totally sympathise I had horrendous morning sickness and poor ds1 spent a lot of the time in front of the tv! I can't hear bob the builder theme tune even now without making me feel sick!

The one thing I used to do everyday was fill the bath right up with lots of bubbles and toys and get in with ds1. That way I could interact whilst lying back and being close to the toilet and we'd sit in the bath for ages and jst top up the hot water when we got cold!

Hotcoffeeisamemory Sat 13-Oct-12 16:58:34

Oh lovely x

You are so not a crappy mum.

It will pass.

Now, hoops on toast is a lovely tea.

And your dd will have loved watching the tv all day.

No harm will come to our dd if she has something on toast dinners for a while. Honest.

If possible, could your husband/ good friend make some meals that you could freeze and microwave for your dd.

Don't feel bad. Most of us have been there xxxx

ditsydoll Sat 13-Oct-12 16:59:09

Haha yeah we do send a lot of time in the bath, for some reason it helps to ease the nausea too. Iv barely kept anything down in about 2 weeks now and feeling pretty light headed a lot of the time. Really looking forward to my 12 week scan so I can actually tell people and grandparents can help me out abit.

boredandrestless Sat 13-Oct-12 17:00:26

You're not a crappy mum. I could just eat spaghetti on toast right now! smile

Do you have anyone who could help you out? A friend, neighbour, relative? Could you afford to pay an enthusiastic teen to play with your DD for an hour or so, and do the pots for you?

I had hyperemesis throughout my pregnancy and cannot imagine feeling soo poorly AND having to look after a child 24/7. You're doing well and you will get through it.

ditsydoll Sat 13-Oct-12 17:01:21

Freezing teas is a great idea, I'm sure I could manage heating some teas up! Just the thought of cooking anything raw makes me feel really ill.

Thanks ladies

ditsydoll Sat 13-Oct-12 17:04:56

I haven't told my relatives yet and don't really have any friends to ask.
Hopefully I won't feel sick for the whole pregnancy, I just don't know how ill cope if I am. I thought pregnancy was hard first time around but its really different having to put a brave face on it for DD and the huge guilt I feel when I can't be my usual self with her.

ScrambledSmegsEvilTwin Sat 13-Oct-12 17:08:56

Oh, I feel for you. I had horrible ms this time round up until about 20 weeks - I didn't when pregnant with DD. It gets pretty embarrassing when your 2yo pretends to vomit in the street and calls it 'being mummy' blush. Really should have remembered the travel sickness bags more often!

You're really not a crappy mum. You sound very unwell though - have you been to the GP yet? If you're feeling light-headed then that's something to take seriously. Try and stay hydrated at least. Take care, and don't feel guilty. You're doing the best you can in very difficult circumstances.

MikeOxardForHalloween Sat 13-Oct-12 18:49:42

Aw, you're a fab mum. There's absolutely nothing wrong with spaghetti hoops on toast (yum) and a bit of telly. Pregnancy is a really hard time, especially if you have bad sickness, you have to do what you have to do to get through, we've all been there. Massive hugs. x

ditsydoll Sat 13-Oct-12 19:10:40

Thanks everyone. Feeling a little better this evening and have managed to keep some toast down! Victory lol. Hopefully DH will be home soon and I will be able to have a good old moan smile

monkeysbignuts Sat 13-Oct-12 19:24:07

yabu!! you are not a crappy mum and stop being so hard on yourself.
I am 39+6 with my third and spent the first 15 weeks with my head down the loo, my 5 & 3 year old are fine smile They have survived mum being miserable and sick, then sleep deprived and grouchy.
You are giving you're daughter a sibling to play with and when they are older it will be lovely!

It will pass and get easier I promise smile soon you will be knee deep in nappys, covered in baby spit up lol. good luck x

DesperatelySeekingPerfection Sat 13-Oct-12 19:41:55

You are not a crappy mum!

Yum toast and hoops? Every night? Yes purrrrlease.

Tv all day? My brother watched TV all day when he was small and he is now a frickin' genius.... Go figure!!!!

Do not feel bad, there will be no lasting damage to your DD. in fact, she's probably enjoying it and its not as if its lovely sunny weather outside.

Hope you feel better soon. X

boredandrestless Sat 13-Oct-12 20:13:23

Bear in mind you don't have to tell them you are pg, just tell them you have a bug/food poisoning and that you would really appreciate an hour or two of them lending a hand. wink

Hope you feel better soon, but if you don't please go to the docs.

McHappyPants2012 Sat 13-Oct-12 20:20:33

Sounds like a nice tea.

You not a crap mum, you are pregnant.

NotEnoughJamOnTheBread Sat 13-Oct-12 20:23:27

Hey honey, I've got 4 DCs and the three eldest don't remember a thing about those early months. All they can really remember is me with a huge bump in the last few months. In fact I'd day their memories are a bit wooly until about the age of 5 or 6 so please don't stress about it.

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