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AIBU?

to just not care how I look?

135 replies

CailinDana · 10/10/2012 09:33

I feel a bit of an odd one out in this, so anyone out there join me? How I look doesn't even occur to me. I look in the mirror in the morning to make sure there's no jam on my face and I brush my hair but beyond that I think I just look like a woman and don't really give a hoot whether I'm wrinkly, or have not great skin or whatever. I wear make up on the odd night out, more because it's sort of a habit than that I think it makes me look any better. I'm lucky that I don't put on weight easily so I don't really think about my figure either. I would never consider any sort of beauty treatment because I can't honestly see the point. Am I weird? Or will I suddenly look in the mirror in ten years (I'm 30 now) and be horrified Shock

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ivanapoo · 10/10/2012 09:37

Not weird, it sounds like you're lucky. No body/appearance hang ups. As long as you're not making a point of not caring for deeper rooted reasons of course.

I'm not a particularly highly groomed person but find the ritual of putting on make up/ doing my hair and choosing an outfit I feel good in quite relaxing and fun.

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SoleSource · 10/10/2012 09:38

Yanbu I do not care how you look either.

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dexter73 · 10/10/2012 09:39

SoleSource Grin

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CailinDana · 10/10/2012 09:40

I see what you mean ivana, and despite having some definitely large issues, I don't think my appearance is linked to them. I'm always really surprised when a friend of mine says "Oh I hate the way I look, I hate my this and that and the other." To me they just look like my friend, I would never even notice anything "wrong" with them and it makes me sad that they feel so bad about themselves, for no reason really. I suppose I think you get the body/face you're given and while there are small adjustments you can make (excluding surgery) you just have deal with what you have. As long as it works, it'll do!

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CailinDana · 10/10/2012 09:40

Heh SoleSource Grin

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flyoverthegoldenhill · 10/10/2012 09:40

nearly x posted with Dexter Grin

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Boomerwang · 10/10/2012 09:41

I don't know. I never give any attention to my own looks apart from keeping fuzz-free (where did that phrase come from?) but I'm not sure if I should be making more of an effort.

I'm overweight. As soon as I get overweight I give up on the rest of myself and just become an ugly slob.

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alienreflux · 10/10/2012 09:41

you do care how you look, cos you check if you have jam on your face!!
you are lucky in that you feel confident without making much of an effort, if you are happy, and your oh doesn't recoil in horror, then great!

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MrsKeithRichards · 10/10/2012 09:41

Yanbu

On the same token not everyone who does give a shit has issues, or nothing better to do or low confidence nor do they all neglect their children.

Just getting that in before it all starts!

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CailinDana · 10/10/2012 09:43

I don't even shave. I know I must sound like a slob, but I don't think I am. DH thinks I'm gorgeous. I haven't a clue really and I've given up trying to get it.

Boomerwang I think if it's affecting your self esteem then maybe you do need to do something about it?

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alienreflux · 10/10/2012 09:43

boomerwang :( big can be beautiful you know, just cos you've got extra junk in your trunk doesn't mean you are unattractive, giving up and feeling shit makes you unattractive xx

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MrsWolowitz · 10/10/2012 09:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CailinDana · 10/10/2012 09:44

Well yes I draw the line at going out with food on my face! I did stop before going out last night and say to DH "is my face clean?" as I'd just been eating pasta Smile

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SunshineOutdoors · 10/10/2012 09:46

I aspire to being like that. Reading Caitlin Moran's How To Be A Woman has helped me loads. I think you're lucky.

Just out of interest, do you read/look at women's magazines at all?

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SunshineOutdoors · 10/10/2012 09:47

I do like wearing make up though... But for fun rather than trying to look natural/cover up perceived imperfections iyswim

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Chandon · 10/10/2012 09:54

Do you shave under your arms? Do you shave your legs ever? Or even wax?

Would you pluck a stray long black hair sprouting from your chin? (little surprises mothar nature has for us once we are past 35)

Would you use moisturiser, perfume? Do you have your hair cut in a nice style?

Or are you just a light-weight in terms of not caring Grin

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Leena49 · 10/10/2012 10:19

No I care thankfully. But not to the extent that I'm sitting in nail bars at 45!

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IsSpringSprangedYet · 10/10/2012 10:20

YANBU - I don't or wouldn't care how people looked either, done up or not. They look as they do.

Having said that, I wish I looked a little healthier but can't really do much about how I look at the moment anyway, as I am knackered so I will look tired and run down. Can't do much but just get on with life.

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BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 10/10/2012 10:49

I'm lucky that I don't put on weight easily so I don't really think about my figure either - you do care or you wouldn't say you are lucky :)

Of course YANBU - if you are happy with yourself than that is brilliant....wish I could find self acceptance that so far eludes me. I dont spend ages grooming myself and having manicures etc but I do loads of exercise to keep fit, do all the skincare regime, de-fuzz, wear make up etc etc. I have to say though, I want to look good for me, not for anyone else.

Each to his own is what I say.

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samandi · 10/10/2012 10:51

I wouldn't say I don't care how I look, but I certainly don't wear make up every day or worry needlessly about the state of my nails or shape of my nose ... I do think it's important to be fairly presentable, especially in professional environments, by which I mean brushing your hair, being clean and wearing smartish clothes, that kind of thing. Anyway you sound pretty healthy in attitude to me :-)

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Feminine · 10/10/2012 10:54

YANBU to not care.

at just 30 though, I can't imagine there would be much to worry about anyway Grin

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irishchic · 10/10/2012 12:04

Yeah OP, but wait till you are 40, then you might be saying different...

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Brycie · 10/10/2012 12:06

I think it's a bit odd to say that. Maybe not odd, it's just like you don't care what impression you give people. I suppose that's ok.

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CailinDana · 10/10/2012 12:07

Well yes Feminine, I do wonder if in a few years I'll feel a bit differently :)

I shave if I'm going bare legged or swimming which isn't often, but other than that I don't shave at all no. That's one area where I do care and wish I didn't -I absolutely hate shaving and would love to be able to go out with bare, hairy legs but having seen how others who do that are treated, I don't have the balls.

That's fair about the figure thing Betty - I think if I started to get fat I would worry, particularly from a health point of view.

I don't use moisturiser or perfume, in fact I really hate perfume due to having a ridiculously strong sense of smell, and I cut my hair once a year, once it gets too long to dry quickly. There's no particular style to it, it's just cut straight across.

I haven't ever read women's magazines, they seem to be mostly ads, aren't they?

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CailinDana · 10/10/2012 12:07

I don't quite get you Brycie - could you explain?

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