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to ask DH NOT to take a piss in the morning

(154 Posts)
BurntToastSmell Tue 09-Oct-12 20:22:46


- we live in a tiny 2 bedroom flat (DH shows no interest in leaving it despite my pleading).
- I've got a 2yr old DD & 9 mth old DS.
- DH leaves early for work in the morning. The bathroom is right next to the kids' bedroom. When he has his morning piss he manages to wake me (I'm not bothered about this) and wake the kids (I am bothered about this).
- I'm at home all day alone with the kids, and I'm not being precious when I say, it is physically exhausting. I'm on pills for anxiety and depression and often find it difficult to cope.
- When DH doesn't get up early for work, the kids sleep for at least another 2 hours. This definitely helps me to cope better with the rest of the day.

I reached the conclusion that it must be DH having a piss before work that wakes the kids up. So I suggested to him that he not piss before leaving for work (anytime up till 5am is fine). And he completely blew up at me. He got very angry.

I didn't think I was being overly unreasonable with my suggestion, as I've been preventing myself from pissing after 5am for months now. (Yup, it can be uncomfortable at times - but getting up at that hour and having the kids all day on your own is even "more^ uncomfortable).


Canidae Tue 09-Oct-12 20:44:37

How about a large plant that he could water every morning? smile

YABU to ask him not to pee but can ask him to put down some loo roll to muffle it a bit.

BurntToastSmell Tue 09-Oct-12 20:44:46

I have no idea what it is about him peeing that wakes us all up. I'm always awaken from a deep sleep, and it's always as he's pissing. We have wipe-clean floor that are creaky, so maybe that's it. I've been holding in my morning pisses for months, so - he should too! Screw you guys grin

JustFabulous Tue 09-Oct-12 20:45:01

Charliefox - seriously?

ratspeaker Tue 09-Oct-12 20:46:47

You need a good old fashioned chamber pot
He could then pee in that and leave it in the bedroom for you to empty later.
Hopefully he wont need a dump

Of course it could be that its someone moving around, door opening and closing thats waking the kids

BurntToastSmell Tue 09-Oct-12 20:58:13

Guys,. you are going to find it hillarious that every morning he exits through the window instead of through the door. 100% true.

Chubfuddler Tue 09-Oct-12 20:59:42

Is there a reason for that?

50smellsofshite Tue 09-Oct-12 21:00:21

I worked with some Swedish men a few years back and they told me it was very common in Scandinavian countries for men to sit down and pee.

I have no idea if this is true. Anyone?

BurntToastSmell Tue 09-Oct-12 21:02:28

Chub - cause the main door is very loud and right next to the nursery.

GrimAndHumourless Tue 09-Oct-12 21:02:33

you need to crochet a baffle

<taps nose>

Tuttutitlookslikerain Tue 09-Oct-12 21:04:11

Christ, you must be really light sleepers or your DH must be really noisy!

My DH gets up at 5.10am and I don't even hear the alarm clock go off!

BurntToastSmell Tue 09-Oct-12 21:04:49

Sitting down to pee makes complete sense.

- relaxing
- less concentration required
- cleaner (less splashes)
- warms the seat for the next person
- and most importantly, it's more QUIET

JacqueslePeacock Tue 09-Oct-12 21:05:17

A urine baffle??

honeytea Tue 09-Oct-12 21:05:30

I worked with some Swedish men a few years back and they told me it was very common in Scandinavian countries for men to sit down and pee. I have no idea if this is true. Anyone?

That's not true.

Anonymumous Tue 09-Oct-12 21:06:10

CharlieFox, my DH won't let our sons stand up to pee because they are both terrible for gazing round the room while they're doing it and peeing up the walls, over the cistern or into the bath. So, yes, they have to sit down and hold their willies down - or face parental wrath!

ivykaty44 Tue 09-Oct-12 21:08:38

someone needs to invent the wee muffler

Chubfuddler Tue 09-Oct-12 21:09:26

I actually think you need to get your children used to sleeping through light background noise. Not peeing and climbing out if windows is odd.

apostropheuse Tue 09-Oct-12 21:11:05're cracking me up! grin

OP ...why the hell does he exit via the window???

Maybe you could buy some of those disposable bedpan bottle they give to men in hospital - then he can use it in the garden on his way out. It surely must be biodegradable! grin

MayTheOddsBeEverInYourFavour Tue 09-Oct-12 21:12:00

God your poor DH he's not allowed to pee in his own home and he's not allowed to use the door either!

You do realise your very U and sounding like a bit of a nightmare don't you?! grin

MoreBeta Tue 09-Oct-12 21:13:06

Sit down, don't flush, don't slam the door.

It really is that simple.

<voice of experience>

JacqueslePeacock Tue 09-Oct-12 21:14:46

We don't flush while DS is sleeping (nightmare sleeper), but not to wee at all would be beyond me!

JacqueslePeacock Tue 09-Oct-12 21:15:36

Do you maybe have a compost heap in need of dampening? grin

TheTermagantToaster Tue 09-Oct-12 21:15:40

Most Japanese men sit down to pee, so says DH.

OP, have you considered a white noise CD on low in the nursery?

TiggyD Tue 09-Oct-12 21:16:34

You are the most evil person so far this century.


secondseverncrossing Tue 09-Oct-12 21:19:01

My cousing lives in Switzerland and apparently he is not allowed to pee standing up after something like 9PM in order to avoid causing too much noise to the neighbours (live in a flat).

pictish Tue 09-Oct-12 21:19:51

So...he climbs out of a window in the morning, and is now expected not to pee?
Is this for real?! grin

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