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to ask who has had botox or fillers or plastic surgery of some kind?

(278 Posts)
wrinklesandproud Tue 09-Oct-12 19:55:08

(namechanged for this).

I can honestly say that having any of the above has never entered my mind. I'll be 40 next year. I have some wrinkles on my forehead, a neck that seems to be looking increasingly wobbly and wrinkly, and crinkles all round my eyes. But I just thought that was what happened as you got older. No-one I knew until very recently has ever had any 'work done'. Botox was something you read about in Grazia magazine.

But we've moved recently to a new area and (public) school and it seems that with the people where we live it is the norm to go for regular botox and/or fillers and/or other surgery from boob jobs to liposuction. This is discussed the same way buying a new dress would be chatted about over coffee. For the first time in my life I feel as though I am the odd woman out for just going au natural. I am starting to be swayed by their way of thinking, whereas previously I never could have imagined me having any of this stuff done.

So I'm just curious to know how many mumsnetters have either had any of these things done (if so what) and if not, would you consider it?

I sort of feel as though having stuff done is cheating, but if you're the only sucker not cheating, you end up as the loser.

digerd Fri 24-May-13 11:54:25

I was 59 when I noticed in the harsh lights of the public loo in the airport, that my forehead was all scrunched up and I looked like one of those people in Startrek.
I decided to try Botox, and it was wonderful. I had a smooth shiny forehead like it had been before. I felt so much younger as looked it.

But, next time wasn't so perfect and went back for a top-up. I ended up having SPOK eyebrows - they were shaped in an upside down V. Also noticed that while the frown lines couldn't move in between the eyebrows, when I did frown, the skin wrinkled both sides farther back over the brows - so couldn't win.
The frown lines, horizontal lines and crows feet did not wrinkle, though. But couldn't be bothered after a while and not had it for years.<Too past it now and not worth it, anyway>sad

Branleuse Fri 24-May-13 12:02:32

i think my boobs are a lovely embellishment.. smile

The thing is, I could think about it and do what other people think i should do, and try and be happy with what other people think I should be happy with, OR, I could think about it and do what makes me feel better about my physical appearance.
I chose to please myself.

I researched it really extensively, chose my surgeon very carefully, was very careful to follow guidelines for safety. Id already had general anaesthetic before, so was ok about that, and im really happy with my boobs now. It changed absolutely nothing else about my life. I dont flaunt them. I dont encourage other people to get them. Im just happier inside because I dont feel like ive got a 90 year old pensioners boobs in a younger persons body.

I never felt like it was my responsibility to make people think that looking old was great, or that having a very pear shaped figure was just as attractive as any other.
I also dont see it as my responsibility to show people that having saggy 'tennis ball in a sock' breasts were great. If you have them and you think theyre fine and you embrace that, then im really pleased for you. Theyre probably lovely, as im sure YOU are, but i really like my boobs now, a whole lot more than i did after they inflated and deflated so much after 3 pregnancies, I was able to afford it, and im really ok with it

Branleuse Fri 24-May-13 12:04:04

i dont think people always know about botox and fillers etc,

I think its easy to tell when someones overdone it, but certainly not the majority of people.

eccentrica Fri 24-May-13 12:20:52

"I could think about it and do what other people think i should do, and try and be happy with what other people think I should be happy with, OR, I could think about it and do what makes me feel better about my physical appearance. I chose to please myself."

I just think it's a bit odd how so many people's "personal choice" about how they want to look just to please themselves is exactly the same as everyone else's "personal choice" - thinner, less wrinkly, bigger boobs, etc etc.

Of course on some level I'd like to get rid of my post-baby belly fat and pump up my boobs. But I don't want to feed that insecurity in myself, or prop up an industry which is basically dedicated to making women feel shit about themselves.

It's a narrative about empowerment (my money, my body, my choice) which doesn't recognise how much that choice has been shaped and pushed upon you by a money-making business which evidently does not give a damn about its customers' health.

Read any fashion magazine and you see hundreds of pages of ridiculously skinny, pubescent girls modelling clothes and selling perfumes, then pages and pages at the back of adverts for cosmetic surgery. It's so obvious. First of all destroy women's confidence and make them feel they look shit if they're not a 14-year-old anorexic. Then offer them the magical solution straight away.

handcream Fri 24-May-13 12:30:22

I have deep wrinkles. It makes me look older than I am. I am in a role where I am customer facing and having Botex makes me feel better. It doesnt destroy my confidence at all.

I have it because it blooming well works as opposed to all those Estee Lauder claims and creams costing over £100 which dont!

But I 100% agree with you about girls modelling clothes and advertising skin care and they are in their early 20's.

Did anyone see the pictures of Sharon Stone recently at 55. She has had loads of work done but very well, she literally rocked that event and strod in as though she owned the place.

Do wonder why some celebs have what they have and then deny they have done anything when it is clearly obvious they have!

Branleuse Fri 24-May-13 12:46:43

I dont think it is the same as everyone elses personal choice. I mean, obviously to a certain extent, and appearing relatively youthful, healthy and....nubile is something a lot of people aspire to. It is also something a lot of people just ARENT that bothered about either, clearly.
We mostly want to look human, roughly representative of our gender and to knock a couple of years from the clock.

Apart from that, i think theres a fairly wide variety of personal taste involved

squoosh Fri 24-May-13 13:11:06

'I think big (certainly, enhanced) breasts are somewhat, dare I say it, trashy.'

And naturally big breasts are what, 'probably' trashy?


handcream Fri 24-May-13 13:15:13

I have trashy boobs (32G) and size 10. Its the children who have done this to me!

Getting droopy as well. Bra's like Platex Doreen are calling.....

squoosh Fri 24-May-13 13:15:57

I'm pretty vain, love expensive skin care, love makeup but I doubt I'd ever go down the botox/filler route, something about it makes me think we've gone a bit too far with our quest for body modification. Plus I've seen too many horrific examples.

Also, on a slightly more superficial note, once you have botox and everyone tells you how fresh you look you're kind of anchored to the upkeep. I'd imagine once the effects wear off people are equally likely to comment 'Christ, she looks haggard all of a sudden'.

squoosh Fri 24-May-13 13:17:16

<Gives handcreams trashy boobs a reassuring and only semi sleazy jiggle>

squoosh Fri 24-May-13 13:20:32

The one thing I really hate is when people get fillers to their upper lip so that it's of equal volume to the bottom lip.


Very few people's top and bottom lips match, it just distorts the lip line and make you look ducklike.

GetOrfMoiLand Fri 24-May-13 13:26:23

I have had botox - and will continue to do so. I have it every 9 months or so. I have it just between my eyebrows and it stops me frowning all the damn time.

I have a very frowny face - I walk around frowning pretty much. Plus spend all day looking down at a computer looking at spreadsheets so frown at those fuckers as well.

I was starting to get lines which were pretty noticeable. I don't want to look younger than I am - I just want to look my age (mid 30s) and not so bloody miserable. I would not consider having my crows feet done - I like them, and think they are attractive, but frown lines are not.

Nobody ever noticed. It wasn't for anyone else, it was for me. I don't look like Kim Kardashian's mother. I don't look like I have had anything done.

BONUS far less headaches now.

Yes, it is vanity, but what's wrong with that? grin I go to a very reputable nurse who comes highly recommended and it is a cheap price to pay for me to not feel haggard.

GetOrfMoiLand Fri 24-May-13 13:30:52

squoosh for some reason I frown a lot less now even when the botox has worn off. Probably why I go so long between treatments (have had 3). probably just get out of the habit. It wears off very subtley as well - you don't go from having a smooth forehead to Grotbags overnight. grin

I also think that I am better off spending x amount having botox every 9 months and using face cream from Lidl. I never believe the spurious claims that expensive make up companies make, it's all a load of boswellox. I just slather on spf40, never sit in the sun and prevent myself from frowning. Works for me, anyway.

I don't think it is a slippery slope - I don't think I would ever consider fillers for instance.

handcream Fri 24-May-13 13:48:14

Where I think we go wrong is cosmetic houses selling vry expensive face creams that wont really do much that a cheaper version will and WE BUY THEM!

I am just as guility. I wonder if its the fuss your made of at the counter as opposed to just pulling a cream off the shelf without any assistance.

MrsMelons Fri 24-May-13 16:23:25

I have had a boob job but never surgery on my face or botox. I am not sure I would have the nerve to do it but I guess my 32Hs detract from my wrinkles grin

MrsMelons Fri 24-May-13 16:25:30

BTW my boobs do not look trashy, they are very natural and sound much bigger than they are. At 30 I did not want droopy deflated breasts thats all. They are not like Jordans!

Estherbelle Fri 24-May-13 16:45:41

I'm 34 and have had Botox in my forehead for 2 years now - I usually go for a top up every 4 months My partner (who I met a few weeks after I had my first treatment) is anti cosmetic surgery and has no idea I have it done. In fact he said it would be a turn-off if I ever had anything like that, because I look so natural as I am - if only he knew!! I talk quite openly about it with some friends (a few who've since tried it themselves) but I have other friends who I wouldn't dream of confessing to because they've been vocal about how they think it's "shallow", etc, even though those same friends consider me the opposite of shallow.

I'm extremely happy with my boobs, but even if I wasn't I think I would be too squeamish to have implants - especially because you have to have them replaced every 10 years or so. I would definitely consider liposuction though if I could afford it, but somehow I don't think I'd be able to undergo the treatment without my partner noticing!

MrsMelons Fri 24-May-13 16:55:14

Liposuction is a lot more instrusive than breast implants and a tough recovery by all accounts. My are over muscle implants so not that instrusive.

Its weird how we are all sqeamish about different things.

MrsMelons Fri 24-May-13 17:51:24

instrusive? Intrusive! My typing is awful today!

PasswordProtected Fri 24-May-13 20:32:18

I had botox for the first time a month before my 50th birthday & have it when finances allow. I just look like I have slept well. If you can find a good practitioner you should look "normal" not facially immobile.
However, with all these treatments your own genes play a major part.

BegoniaBampot Fri 24-May-13 21:05:14

Shaking my head at the 20 something yr old who was pleased she had no wrinkles due to Botox and fillers - crazy. I can see why folk are sucked into it but I just think it's a shame. So folk who are relying on nothing ae looking at themselves in the mirror thinking 'fuck, I look rough compared to everyone else' as everyone else is booted up. That will be your daughters in a few years bt probably even more pressure t look good by then.

roastednut Fri 24-May-13 21:56:15

I'm interested in botox for vanity and headaches. If anyone can recommend a good practitioner in leeds/yorkshire area then please let me know smile

Wuldric Fri 24-May-13 22:02:30

Gorblimey, everyone over 45 here has botox. Just everyone. Check the arches on the eyebrows - that slightly startled look is a dead giveaway. I get mine done at my dentist. I book at the same time as my 6mth check-up. No ghastly side effects that you have noted.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 24-May-13 22:08:43

Agree with DonDraper and Cabrinha's posts.

i'm happy enough with myself. Certainly happy enough not to risk anything going wrong with any interventions.

I resent the disdain for older women's faces and bodies.
I also think that the plastic surgery aesthetic results in something that is not a normal face.

I agree with whoever said up thread that the risk of not knowing when to stop would prevent me.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 24-May-13 22:12:43

And yyyyyy i agree about the frankly insulting practice of using teenage or slightly older women to advertise womens clothes. I had a figure like them then, so it's not bleeding jealousy. The difference is, that I di not wear adults clothes.

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