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to not go to my own birthday party?

(9 Posts)
mamamibbo Mon 08-Oct-12 14:37:01

i have made it very very clear i dont want a party (its a 'big' birthday)

ive told my mum i dont want one absolutely definately do not throw me a party

she thinks i have to have one so shes going to throw me one -- so she can say that she did it al for me and look good--

the place she wants to have it isnt suitable for small children and i have 3

would i be unreasonable to tell her i wont be there?

Viviennemary Mon 08-Oct-12 14:39:46

YANBU. If you have warned your Mum and said you didn't want a party. Say you've got other plans for any date she chooses.

Jins Mon 08-Oct-12 14:39:58

I don't think so but then I didn't go to my own 'big' birthday party either.

I think if you've said you don't want one before she decided to arrange it then she's going to have to accept the answer 'No'

Bunbaker Mon 08-Oct-12 14:42:18

Just tell her you hate parties and if she throws one you won't go anyway. Why is it so difficult for her to understand that?

diddl Mon 08-Oct-12 14:44:05

You´ve told her that you don´t want a party.

If she organises one-more fool her.

Why would what she wants for your bday be more important than what you want?

Kendodd Mon 08-Oct-12 14:44:44

Ask her to give you the guest list so that you can phone everyone to cancel.

picnicbasketcase Mon 08-Oct-12 14:45:31

YANBU. You've made your wishes clear. If she ignores you and does it anyway, so be it.

whistlestopcafe Mon 08-Oct-12 14:46:34

I upset a few people recently because they think that they were not invited to my 40th. I didn't have a party or do anything yet I have managed to cause offence. hmm

Hippolyta20 Mon 08-Oct-12 15:24:18

YANBU. If it doesn't seem to be sinking in, perhaps write it down? Try and do it as positively as possible (appreciate she cares/prepared to make the effort etc) but that it is your day and it is not what you want. That way:

1 - She can't argue back and has to read it
2 - If she does go ahead anyway and you don't go, she can't say she didn't realise you really didn't want one or similar.

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